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Clingy 2 year old

(4 Posts)
pommedeterre Fri 28-Mar-14 11:02:19

DD2 has just turned two. She has always been 'clingy' if you interpret constant breastfeeding and no sleeping unless being cuddled until 10 months as 'clingy'.

She will hang off me and scream unless I am cuddling her when we are at home. It is impossible to get anything done at times.

This behaviour is only with me. Dh and the nanny report a totally different child to the one I spend time with. She also insists on having a dummy at all times with me, and is fine without it with them.

I work three days a week and one morning a week have one to one time with her when I try to do something with her like swimming or playgroup. I probably would play with her more hanging out at home if every chore that needs doing didn't take 4 times as long as it should to get done!

DD1 was never like this. Am currently pg with number 3 and feeling upset and frustrated about my relationship with dd2.

Any tips?!!

Mrs2boys Fri 28-Mar-14 13:12:21

If she's not like this with everyone then I think this just proves that you are her all time favourite person wink . In all seriousness though it can drive you nuts trying to get anything done when they just cling! It's frustrating for both of you.

My DS1 was a lot like this. He was high needs from birth, needed a lot of physical contact and comforting, constant soothing really. Eventually as his language improved I could say 'You stay here with teddy, Mummy will go do x' always always say 'I'll be back in a minute.' And make sure you start small and build up. Often with DS1 I'd literally just go out the room for 15 seconds, then come back in a gain, just to reassure him that I was indeed going to return! It's really hard. When DS1 got to be about 2.3- 2.6 ish (can't quite remember the exact age) but I could say 'Please can you look after mummy's watch for me while I go put the washing away?' for some reason he got comfort from holding something of mine and he believed I would come back for the watch (why he thought I'd return for a flimsy watch and not for him, I don't know!).

Anyway, just wanted to reassure you that it will get better. DS1 is 6 now and such a confident, lovely, happy, secure child. He's not clingy in any way at all. He's perfectly happy to go to school every day.

DS2 (2.3) is not quite so clingy but even now he still wants to be in the same room as me constantly and often runs up just to kiss and cuddle my leg which is lovely but means a lot of the time I am cooking or cleaning I have a little cling on but anything beats the screaming and crying from DS1!

Sounds like you're doing a pretty good job and remember she's only like this because you are so important to her. Sometimes it's haaaaard to remember that.

clabsyqueen Fri 28-Mar-14 23:07:16

Oh gosh, I feel your pain.
My 2yr old DD allegedly NEVER needs her dummy with the childminder but the minute she see me she screams for it.
My 7month old DD2 will play happily in the company of anyone until she sees me. Cries constantly unless I'm holding her.
I'm stumped. Sounds flattering eh? Feels far from it.

pommedeterre Sat 29-Mar-14 09:00:15

Thanks guys. Nice to know I'm not alone!

It feels like everyone else has a lot more fun with her than I do which makes me feel sad. In not great at patience either so I get stressed quite quickly when the screaming and demands for cuddles start.

I used to just carry her on my hip and do everything one handed. Now she's nearly 12 kgs and I'm 15 weeks pg it's no that easy!

Might try the watch tip!

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