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Need for approval

(4 Posts)
ConstantWorrywort Mon 24-Mar-14 11:36:05

DD is 7, and an only child. How do I know if the approval and encouragement I'm providing is sufficient? How much need for approval should I consider as being on par for a 7 yo? I know it's hard to reach the right balance 100% of the time, but I do not want to overdo or underdo it 100% of the time either. Sometimes a piece of "art work" is a page of squiggles, but should I call them squiggles or "beautiful works of creativity"? Is this a puzzler every parent faces regularly, or am I neurosis personified?

Goldmandra Mon 24-Mar-14 11:40:43

Sometimes a piece of "art work" is a page of squiggles, but should I call them squiggles or "beautiful works of creativity"?

Don't call it anything. Ask her about it. What she was thinking of, why she chose those colours, etc. Get her to think about what she got from the experience so she starts to notice the intrinsic rewards we get from doing things.

If you're approving of something she's done, explain why you are pleased, e.g. I'm glad you tidied your room so quickly because it will be nicer for you to relax in and we'll have time to doing some baking together now.

ConstantWorrywort Mon 24-Mar-14 12:40:54

Thank you, Goldmandra.

BlueChampagne Tue 25-Mar-14 12:53:13

Excellent advice from Goldmandra. Would add that this is something every parent goes through, particularly with their first child, and regardless of whether that child is an only child or not. First children are almost always only children for a bit!

Do what comes naturally unless you feel you would have benefitted from more approval and encouragement at that age. I'm sure you're doing fine.

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