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Very worried 15 month old DS had ASD

(48 Posts)
Hedger Tue 04-Mar-14 12:10:06


I am so worried about about 15 month old DS and was hoping for some advice. For the last three months or so I have begun to think he may have ASD. He has always slept well, ate well, crawled and walked at the right times, etc. but the things that worry me are as follows:

- He doesn't have much eye contact. He will look at us from time to time but not as much as other babies his age. He does smile and laugh but perhaps not as much as other babies his age.

- He babbles a lot (and has done for a long time) but no words at all.

- He doesn't seem to follow instructions like other babies his age. For example, at his baby classes he doesn't follow any of the movements (clapping hands, etc). We can get him to play with toys and can teach him how they work (putting things in slots, etc) but we really have to spend time showing him and he won't consistently do it.

- He doesn't seem that interested in things. For example, we took him to the zoo the other day and he just wasn't that interested in the animals. He seems like he's daydreaming a lot of the time.

- He doesn't really interact with other people. Again, at his baby classes, he ignores the other babies and adults and wants to be off doing his own thing away from the others most of the time.

- He doesn't point at all, show us anything or seek to get our attention.

- He waved goodbye for the first time the other day but only after a lot of coaxing.

- He loves swinging doors and spinning things.

- He only responds to his name some of the time. Often he ignores us.

I watched a video yesterday of babies his age comparing ASD behaviours with normal behaviours and that's when it really hit home. We just started employing a nanny a few days ago and she says she can see the same lack of interest and communication.

I am just so upset I keep bursting into tears and I don't know what to do with myself - I feel like my world is crashing down around me. I am going to the GP tomorrow to ask for a referral but what I suppose I am looking for is (a) reassurance (has anyone's child's had similar traits but overcame them with time?) (b) advice as to autism experts in London (we are prepared to go private to get early treatment) and also any support groups or helplines for just someone to chat to as I really am struggling with this.

Thanks so much in advance.

Paintyfingers Wed 05-Mar-14 00:30:16

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ardiente Thu 06-Mar-14 17:47:50

OP, my DS behaved exactly the same way when he was 15 months: no pointing, little eye contact, not following instructions, nightmare to get him interested in any of the baby classes activities. I took him to the Paediatrician who took a look at him and said he was perfectly normal and just wanted to do what he wanted to do. He is now 2, talks a lot and is super sociable, interested in many activities, etc. Like you, I had this sinking feeling that he wasn't behaving like other children, but now I realise I shouldn't have been so stressed. Get him seen by professionals to have a clear picture of what is going on and go from there. Good luck.

Hedger Thu 06-Mar-14 18:20:00


Thanks so much, you are all so kind to take the time to reply.

PJ67 and Ardiente - My goodness your posts are reassuring! Thanks for sharing that - it makes it a bit easier to think there might be a glimmer of hope. I am a real worrier by nature so maybe there is just a small chance I might be over-stressing and looking for worrying behaviours. I hope so!

We are seeing a well respected speech, language and communication therapist tomorrow and a neurological paediatrician next week so hopefully I will have a better idea then what I am dealing with.

I'll report back - I am so pleased I found Mumsnet, it is very therapeutic to be able to write about my worries and have such lovely support from you all.

RnB Thu 06-Mar-14 18:36:30

OP you are absolutely doing the right thing being on the case. My son was similar at the same age - I asked the HV to refer at 18 months and we got a diagnosis at 23 months. This was essential in accessing resources and starting the Statementing process. We started early intervention at 26 months and he made fantastic progress. He is now 12 and is a wonderful boy.

I wish you both well. Feel free to pm me if you like.

stoopstofolly Thu 06-Mar-14 18:36:43

You could be describing my DS at 15 months. I was concerned, the nursery also raised concerns- lack of interaction, off in his own world, babbling but no speech etc... Its sounds like we watched the same video and I recognised a lot of my son in it.
He's now 3.6 and pretty much NT. He's a bit of a loner (like his dad) who enjoys taking things apart and building models but who also plays well with others and has lots of friends. A lot of my concern was probably down to the fact that he was a slow developer in the social sphere (just like his dad!) but the main problem turned out to be his glue ear. The NHS are not good at referring young children so we went privately (I can recommend a chap in London who's expert in very young children) and he had grommets fitted at 2- with amazing results.
Investigate all the options and don't worry too much. Even if he is somewhere on the spectrum this isn't necessarily a bad thing- my DB is AS and has made a huge success of his life in business and academia (and married a lovely patient woman!)

Hedger Thu 06-Mar-14 18:53:43

RnB and Stoopstofolly - thanks for your posts, both reassuring in that maybe he doesn't have ASD and, even if he does, maybe it won't be severe and he will respond well to help.

Forgettable Thu 06-Mar-14 19:40:45

Good luck my dear x

MabelBee Fri 07-Mar-14 07:14:21

We had our referral to the community developmental paediatrician at 16 months so it definitely isn't too early for you to start the process. Referrals on the NHS can take forever, so the earlier you go, the better. I had ClaraFox's "there, there, you are a bit anxious aren't you?" condescension from 5 GPs I went to for help before we got our referral from the health visitor instead. It took 2 months for us to see the paediatrician and we are still waiting for speech and language therapy over a year later, so get the ball rolling. My thinking is that even though we are too young for diagnosis, the more intervention you can get your hands on the better. One of the most helpful interventions we have managed to get is Portage who have weekly sessions at home with my daughter and she has come on loads since they have started. They are helping to narrow the gap between her and her peers when it comes to playing and participating and it is really noticeable in the 6 months we've been seeing them.

For what it's worth, I also did a lot of crying during the period where I started admitting that there was something wrong. That starting point can be very hard.

sebsmummy1 Fri 07-Mar-14 09:35:31

Mabel what made you think something was wrong if you don't mind me asking?

MabelBee Fri 07-Mar-14 09:50:18

It's tricky to define because it was gut feeling. She is a twin and both had some late development initially because of prematurity, but it became more and more apparent that something was different about her. I started asking for help for her at 7 months old but at that stage it was almost impossible to articulate or even pinpoint what I was asking about. She makes eye contact, I was told, is a good weight. Stop worrying. Even now, at 2.5 years old, with referrals to portage, physio, gastroenterology, salt, dietician, feeding clinic and after our CDC 2 day assessment I still have no answers and still don't have any idea how to define what I'm dealing with. It is very vague and intangible. There is just something not right.

MabelBee Fri 07-Mar-14 10:28:43

Actually, I'm not sure my post is strictly correct. I find it quite difficult to post coherently about this. My initial worries were about happiness (try explaining that to a GP!). She just wasn't a happy infant. She seemed happy as a newborn baby but started crying at 6 months and didn't stop. She didn't seem to want to progress at all, wouldn't play with toys, would scream her way through every outing. Would only calm down if I sang the same song, over and over, for hours. At playgroups when other children were toddling around, playing or participating, she was rolling on the ground screaming and covered in snot. A lot of her problems these days are centred around anxiety. Her current referrals are addressing her severe delays in speech and cognition and some as of yet undefined stomach issues. She is "of concern" to professionals but the vagueness, I think, comes from being pre diagnosis and wanting doctors/therapists to tell me she is absolutely normal but still knowing somewhere at the back of my head that this isn't going to happen. Hoping but without hope. I suppose that her problems are being taken seriously is vindication that I wasn't just being overly anxious and a bit precious when I first started asking for help. This doesn't make me feel better.

StrawberryGashes Fri 07-Mar-14 10:39:41

I was told that these were all normal baby things too, my son now has a diagnosis of ASD amongst other things. If your instincts are telling you somethings not quite right then you're right to find out more. The CHAT test can be done at 18 months and observations can begin now too. It's certainly not too early. Ask for a referral to a paediatrician.

If you're really worried and you feel things aren't moving quick enough you can look at early interventions and see what you can start doing yourself with him. These interventions won't hinder the development of a nt child but can help a child with ASD.

Purplelooby Fri 07-Mar-14 11:18:10

Hi. Firstly you are not being 'overly' anxious. Our children can evoke emotions in us that we had no idea we were capable of feeling. You are upset because you are scared and I've been there too.

I wanted to let you know about something that helped my son with eye contact. Up until about 11 months old he simply didn't make eye contact and I read a helpful post. Sorry I've lost the link but it was about teaching them to make eye contact and communicate - so if you are a mother who is very 'in-tune' with your child's needs they don't bother to communicate with you.

An example is holding up a toy they want and encouraging them to make eye contact with you then handing it over. Or during feeding giving the spoon when they 'ask' be that by eye contact or pointing or speaking, whatever you are working on. This worked wonders with my son. He still has concerns but is so much better at 18 months.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 Fri 07-Mar-14 12:15:10

Aww Mabel. It is hard. I remember. PM me if you want to talk ever.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 Fri 07-Mar-14 12:17:41

And you too OP and anyone else in fact.

MabelBee Fri 07-Mar-14 19:35:51

Thanks Fanjo. Just soldiering on.

Enjoyingmycoffee Fri 07-Mar-14 19:40:37

Pls pls do not worry. This was almost exactly my boy at 15 months. It did not occur to me that something could be wrong.

At 3.5, he is just about the most loving sensitive emotionally astute person I know.

Enjoyingmycoffee Fri 07-Mar-14 19:42:10

Oh he does have speech and language therapy though.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 Fri 07-Mar-14 19:55:07

My Dd is also loving and sensitive wink

Hedger Fri 07-Mar-14 19:56:19

Thanks everyone. We took him to see a speech, language and communication therapist today and as a first step he is going to have his hearing checked. I am hoping against hope he just has glue ear or something. Will report back...

RnB Fri 07-Mar-14 21:16:26

Er my son is also 'loving, astute and emotionally sensitive'! He also happens to be on the autistic spectrum

StrawberryGashes Fri 07-Mar-14 21:59:51

Mine too RnB, very loving and emotionally sensitive infact.

Parkbench123 Mon 12-May-14 23:11:26

I've posted on here a few times about my concerns for my son, but just noticed this old thread and I wanted to say what a helpful and positive thread this is. Hedger, have you had any feedback on possible glue ear? My 9.5 month old son is showing all these signs - just seems to ignore us so much of the time, and everything else you mention. sad Thanks to everyone who commented on this post too! smile

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