terrible two's(9 Posts)
my nearly 2 year old has terrible tantrums and I find it really hard to cope with. Yesterday it was that she didn't want her hood up on her pram - it was blowing a gale and throwing it down so I made her have it up....but she ended up hanging out of her pram, I mean literally upside down and I worried she would hurt herself and maybe fall out!! She also won't tolerate the cosy toes so she would end up cold and wet. My partner says let her get wet so she can learn...what do you think and does anyone have a child like this??
God if it's not one thing it's another isn't it.
I've got twins, 2.8 now and I swear they take it in turns. They're fiercely independent, won't accept help, have to choose everything themselves - totally normal as far as I can tell but really frustrating! I try not to fuss about the small things - plate colour, sock selection etc but with anything to do with safety or health of them and anyone else I will insist. I try very hard to remain calm, explain why they have to do as I say (eg hold hands crossing the road to keep you safe from cars) and I reward hugely for cooperation. I also try to keep 'no' to a minimum eg can I have a banana? yes you can, after lunch.
And LOTS of deep breaths!!
DD1 is almost two and has some irrational grudge match going on against the pushchair raincover. I just put her in decent outdoor clothes and brave the elements unless it's REALLY chucking it down (I can never fold the bastard things back up myself so hate using them). She's had tantrums and been pushing the boundaries since about 13 months old and her younger sister's showing similar signs of being a feisty little bugger too - god help me! I try to hold onto the fact that if she's tenacious, stubborn and determined now - it should do her well in later life - even if it drives me to an early grave in the process!
I also have been known to mentally rate her tantrums out of 10 - you can make nice little ratings systems up and it brings me a little bit of sanity when I feel like I'm about to lose it!
My DD is 17 months and can throw a pretty good tantrum. Tbh most of the time I walk away; trying to be calm saying 'thats enough xx, its not nice and theres no need, come and find me when you are done'.
Unfortunately its more complicated when she has a meltdown on a packed train. I have no issue letting her get it over with strapped in the buggy but I can feel the glares and 1 minutes feels like 10!
I console myself that she is a feisty intelligent little thing and fierily independent - she's just trying to work out her place in the world.
Thanks for the advice, makes me feel better not on my own. I do think my little one is very clever...too clever for me sometimes!! I am always having to rack my brains trying to think of ways to entice her to lie down to let me put her nappy on (toilet training may make things better in the end as bye bye nappies!!). Yes, tantrums are fine in the house but in public and about such a simple thing like a hood (not even got to the rain cover yet!!) it drives me mad. Next time think will leave her to get a little bit wet and see if it works and she may want the hood up in the end!
Just read this as my 2 1/2 year old is having tantrums of epic proportions at the moment. Not sure if it's been the arrival of his baby brother 3 months ago or overtiredness as he's refusing to nap now, but either way it's driving me to distraction. I agree with the at home solutions of walking away etc. but not so easy to do that when out in public. I was in the middle of feeding the baby in a crowded cafe the other day and everything was fine as DS had a drink and snack to keep him busy. Then he dropped his snack and you'd have thought the world had ended! I hurredly replaced the snack with a bit of another one, but he couldn't understand why he couldn't have another whole one and threw himself on the floor kicking and screaming. I decided the best option was to grab them both and escape, however the pram tipped over with the weight of all the bags and coats on the back, so I was totally flustered and everyone was staring. By the time I got them both into the car screaming, plus the pram, bags, etc. etc. and drove off I vowed never to take them both out in public again. Then I realised that what I thought was an open window was actually that I'd left the boot open in my haste! Luckily I hadn't even got out of the car park yet. Arrrggghh! What do we do with public tantrums?
Hey all; sorry to hijack but how long do you let your mini's tantrum without intervening (obviously easier at home)? Mine is 17 months and just started...i'm a bit lost!
DD hates her pushchair hood and raincover, so we don't bother. I got her a good, warm, waterproof coat with a hood, take the view that in really bad weather we're not going to be out in the elements for too long anyway, and that she's not the Wicked Witch of the West and won't melt.
sorry for the trauma tinyflutterby, but made me laugh as it is just the sort of thing that would happen to me! I never see that happen to other people, don't worry you are not on your own! I would have cried if it was me! You have to laugh afterwards though and have a glass of wine when all in bed! You did right to evacuate though I think! xx
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