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Gender-Variant 5yr Old DS - Roman Catholic School

(6 Posts)
HerNibs1980 Sat 20-Jul-13 15:04:19


For the past year now I have noticed my middle DS prefers dressing up in his younger DD dresses, playing with her dolls, does not enjoy rough and tumble games with his older DS, and generally acts like I have another DD. smile

I mentioned it to friends who scoffed at me before spending time with him, where they have now said they've never witnessed it so clearly in one so young. Out of interest I googled it and found a leaflet about Gender variance, which described my DS perfectly. It said he may grow out of it or it may stay with him for life. Which doesnt bother me in the slightest as I am so open minded and love him to death for being him regardless of his gender behaviour.

My only concern is my children attend a Roman Catholic school, (we are not religious at all, but it was the only school in the area that had spaces in the years I needed when we moved to the area. The school is lovely, but I am worried that they will have an issue with him if his gender variant behaviour continues. Does anyone else have any experience with this or know any more about it please?

Thank you in advance. smile xx

PeriodFeatures Sat 20-Jul-13 19:12:45

Hi. You sound like a great mum. I'm not sure what to say about the school issue.

There is an organisation called mermaids that support families with children who gender identity disorder (hate the word disorder btw) Gender variance is much nicer. They might be able to give you some advice.

My DH was a similar 5 year old! The photos of him playing as a child that age do not reflect the reality of his gender at that time at all!!

PeriodFeatures Sat 20-Jul-13 19:14:25

BTW my DH had some treatment for his gender variance on the NHS in a private catholic hospital! Don't worry too much.

DIYandEatCake Sat 20-Jul-13 20:50:13

All schools will have policies on discrimination and bullying, regardless of religious affiliation, and he will be being taught by a qualified teacher who should only be concerned about his education and wellbeing. If you're worried about the carholic church's stance on same sex relationships, i think that's a completely separate issue to a 5 year old's play and clothing preferences. He is still very young and it may be just a phase - my friend's little boy had about a year of dressing like a girl and preferring girl toys and company, at a similar age, but is now going through a real 'superhero' phase... If you're worried about him being picked on by other children etc perhaps try to speak to his class teacher to make sure he's being looked out for.

brettgirl2 Sun 21-Jul-13 07:44:26

Christianity is about being good, tolerant and caring. They will love him grin for who he is . I taught in a Catholic secondary school a few years ago and we had a big variety of children and families.

Nexus6 Mon 22-Jul-13 17:32:29

really great to hear such an understanding and supportive parent your child has! I think that will really help to give him confidence as he gets older, that's vital for those years in school. I hope the school is accepting as you but as you have already experienced there will always be the few that will not understand etc.

I think as DIY said all schools have anti bullying etc policies so maybe just see how everything progresses. I think it will be less of an issue at this young age and if there are any issues they will become apparent when he reaches teenage years.

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