What's the best way to deal with shyness?

[LadyT]

My 4 y.o. DS has started to become really shy whenever we go to new places. He's always been a bit clingy for a few minutes, then once he feels comfortable he's off, in his usual whirlwind manner. But on the last 3 occassions (both adult & child gatherings), he has been clingy for an hour or more. I don't want to distress him by pushing him into situations that make him uncomfortable, but I don't want to pander to this new insecurity, so that it becomes a habit. Any ideas on how to overcome this?

[bluejelly]

My dd was very shy aged 4 and is so much more confident now. School has helped her enormously.

[juuule]

Have a look at \link{http://www.hsperson.com/pages/child.htm\Highly sensitive child}

Might help.

[Mercy]

It sounds like a phase to me, a truly shy child would have shown signs at a much earlier age.

I wouldn't do anything tbh, let him be 'clingy' for as long as it takes. He's only 4 after all

[beansontoast]

oooohhh ill check out that book too...
my little fella is shy too...always has been..like his dad ...but as you say once he feels ok just goes for it.

mmmm...i think id let him 'cling'...i wouldnt think it would turn into a habit.

[juuule]

I thought it was a really good book. It recognises that what we know as shyness is in a lot of cases just a different way of dealing with new situations.
A person who can just dive in is not better/worse than someone who takes time to weigh up a situation first and then dives in. The book also says that such people are essential to populations as a whole and rather than a child being made to over-ride such personality traits they should be able to be themselves.
The book says it much better :o and plenty more besides.

[mousiemousie]

Let him cling while he needs to as anything else will make him feel even less secure!