My nephew (5) wets the bed every night, which is normal, but he soaks through a pullup, his pjs AND the sheets, sometimes twice.

[EleanorHandbasket]

?

SIL was saying this yesterday, with regards to not being able to go on holiday with us.

She has said it before as well. Now, my DD wet the bed until she was eight and was sorted out with a course of medication in the end, I've been on the receiving end of 'helpful' comments from family about cutting down drinks and nighttime lifting and blah blah blah (none of which worked for us), but she never soaked through a nappy, let alone pjs and the sheet.

I'd like to suggest she take him to the gp but I wanted to canvas for opinions here first, in case it is totally within the realms of normal. I don't want to offend her or poke my oar in.

He drinks plenty and and uses the toilet during the day with no problems.

He did have some bowel issues as a toddler, horribly constipated/constant leakage but that is all fine now, I don't know enough to know whether this is connected.

Any advice?

[EleanorHandbasket]

Sad and lonely bump.

Anyone?

[Damnautocorrect]

I found with my ds pull ups are rubbish, they barely hold a dribble so I've stopped using them as he would wee through them and the sheets. He's 4 and it happens once a month or less and we can usually predict iras he's slept longe or fallen asleep in the car, or drunk more.
The twice a night would begin to worry me but not the volume.

[EleanorHandbasket]

She's using those ridiculous pyjama pants things, I have suggested going back to proper nappies but was brushed off.

I'm wary of offering any more advice. But I'm a bit worried about him..

[nannynick]

In my experience of caring for children, wetting every night at that age I would not view as being normal. No doubt a percentage of 5 year olds may wet frequently, whilst some may wet never. I think NHS considers a child to be a regular bedwetter if they are wetting twice a week, which 1 in 6 five year olds do.

Seeing a GP sounds like a good idea to me, especially of the usual things have been tried. Things can then be ruled out, such as UTI, diabeties.
Once medical reasons ruled out, it is very hard to establish a cause and it often resolves itself over time.

Poke your oar in if your relationship with SIL will take that but it is up to SIL to decide to see GP. Surely she knows it could be something to do.

[SpockSmashesScissors]

DS1 is soaked every night, I think it is normal for some children.

Do they never go on holiday because of this She could speak to the school nurse, she might have some ideas or equipment to borrow, even is just for help managing on holiday.

What sort of holiday, is it UK? Could you get a cottage with a washing machine and dryer, and take extra quilts and bedding.

What sort of pullups is he using, DS has the drynites ones, I think he was in the bigger size at age 5 as they hold more, and we used two of the disposable bed mats too for on holiday etc. drynites

DS has actually just had 4 dry nights in a row, first time ever at age 9, am quietly cheering but trying not to get over excited.

[SpockSmashesScissors]

Just to add DS through the school nurse is under the eursis clinic, and wetting every night at age 5 is perfectly normal for some children, even children a lot older, as I say DS is 9 and they are very keen to stress it is normal and he is not alone.

[EleanorHandbasket]

It's abroad, but in a hotel where they would change the sheets daily. It's not until next summer anyway.

I just can't imagine a small boy producing so much weethat he soaks through a nappy, and pj's, and the sheet, twice a night.

It makes me think that there's either a problem, or sil is creating one (this is fairly likely).

Dd was wet every single night until just after her 8th birthday, but never soaked through a nappy.

[EleanorHandbasket]

Yes, we were told it's completely normal, and I've been very careful to stress that to sil as well. It's just the sheer volume of it that I can't get my head round.

[SpockSmashesScissors]

sorry enuresis clinic

[SpockSmashesScissors]

I have to admit I did wonder if it was a bit of an excuse because she didn't want to come, but didn't like to say

You sound lovely, wish my SIL was as friendly.

[EleanorHandbasket]

And before anyone shouts at me for poking my nose in, iI should say that sil asks me for advice about this all the time. And I tell her what worked for us, and suggest bed mats over the sheets and proper nappies rather than expensive pull ups and no red drinks, and then sheignores me. And then asks me for advice again the next time I see her.

So I'm wart of giving advice even when she asks for it because she just gets humphy and ignores me anyway.

[EleanorHandbasket]

It's not just wrt to the holiday, she's been telling me about the extreme wetting for years now.

[princessnumber2]

It's quite common. So I'm to by the docs at our enuresis clinic. Especially up to about age 7. And not that unusual much later too. We had problems every night with soaked pull up and pjs. So we got 3 mattress toppers and used them on top of sheet. Google aquasolari bed pad. When going away we just took a few of these. The advice is lots of drinks in the day but nothing for about 2 hours before bed. No caffeine or fizzy drinks either. However all the meds, alarms and daytime management still don't help some kids and they mostly just grow out of it.

You could suggest asking for a referral but I thought that most GPs wouldn't refer to enuresis clinic till about 6 years old as most cases resolve themselves by that age?

[Glittertwins]

We have a similar issue with DS. He can go weeks at a time with no issue at all then bang, 4 nights in a row totally soaking everything. We don't believe it is any kind of infection, he is a really deep sleeper and simply doesn't wake up. I don't know if a referral would help as he is only 5.

We have now got a small analogue alarm clock that is set for just before midnight. He knows how to turn it off then go to the toilet. We had to move the clock away from him as the sneaky thing was turning the alarm off and not getting out of bed. He is also sleeping on a ready bed as that is a lot easier to wash and dry than sheets, mattress protector and sometimes duvet (launderette job).

[mikkii]

We had the same problem with DS. the NHS will not refer to the enuresis clinic until the child is 7. The advice we were given is:

Lots of drinks throughout the day (about 6 cups);
No drink for 1.5 hours before bedtime;
Last drink not to be milk as the fat content makes it more likely they will wee;
No caffeine;
No black currant as it irritates the bladder;
No nightlights as the room needs to be dark for the body to produce the hormone that slows down the production of wee overnight;
Two wees, this means one when getting ready for bed, a second one last thing before you settle down.

This worked for us, we only had 3 appointments at he clinic and DS was dry. The things that changed for us was drinking more during the day and stopping having a nightlight.

DS still has very occasional accidents, so I still put bedmats under the sheets, but I also use them at he head of the bed for puke protection!

Regarding dry nites, as DS got bigger, although I could still put him into size 6 nappies they did not hold enough wee. I would buy the brand that was on offer.

[starfishmummy]

She should definitely talk to a school nurse as they can refer to continence specialists. They may be entitled to have pads on the nhs - they would probably be "nappy" type, but in bigger sizes, to fit the older child and which hold more.
In the meantime I can recommend this type of bed protector which we used to buy for ds and used as well as nappies. They aren't cheap (I used to buy several packs at a time to get free next day postage) but they were excellent - they go over normal bedding so if they get wet they can just be changed without changing the whole bed. She may be able to get some samples to try.

www.attendslifestyles.co.uk/incontinence-surface-protection-8/attends-80x170-tuckable-251.htm

My ds has sn and is tube fed overnight so used to do huge nightime wees!

[Glittertwins]

Sorry to hijack but does anyone have any ideas what to do about a sneaky 5 yr old who goes back to bed after turning the alarm off without going to the toilet?
We moved the alarm clock right by the door to get him out of bed and we just don't know what to do now.

[KrazyKurls]

DS (5) wets most night and they are massive wees! Maybe boys hold more? We don't bother with nappies/pull ups just bed pads, he has younger brother and sister in nappies so don't want him to feel like a baby.

Incidentally he doesn't wet on holiday or during school holidays, it seems to be he is do tired when at school that he doesn't waken in time so it's a full nights bladder IYSWIM

[NeverendingStoryteller]

My DS at that age was still soaking his pull-ups, his pjs, and all his bedding, often twice every night. The problem with pull ups for little boys is that they have erections during the night - the pull ups mean that their penis is then 'held' in the upright position, even after they have lost their erection, and therefore, urine shoots upwards, away from the padding in the pull up, soaking everything through.

We dealt with this in two steps (I was returning to full time work and wouldn't be able to manage the washing anymore). First, we stopped using pull ups and returned to nappies. This seemed to solve the problem of everything getting soaked and it greatly reduced the amount of washing, and the distress for DS, who was genuinely mortified at how wet his bed would be.

Then, during a school holiday, we rented an alarm, and I slept in his room for two weeks - not ideal, but it was worth the effort in the long run. Every time the alarm went off, he would be bundled out of bed and would be put in front of the toilet to finish his wee. It only took a week until he started getting himself up. The alarm was amazing, but it did take some adult intervention to get it to work properly as a solution. For many kids, they don't hear the alarm going off so the alarm doesn't 'work'. Of course, in our case it worked because I was hearing the alarm and would wake him. I know it sounds inconvenient, but it was the best thing we did. Glittertwins - hope this advice helps you, too.

DS was then dry almost every night - he is now 7 and doesn't need to get up in the night to use the toilet. However, just one caveat - there were a few wet beds after the success of the alarm. We finally figured out that these wet beds coincided with those nights when we had switched off every light in the house. DS, it turns out, is a little bit frightened of the dark, and would have an accident while trying to get his bravery together to make the trip to the toilet! We started leaving a light on every night for him, and we stopped all accidents from that point onwards.

So, lots of advice re: kid, but I'm afraid I don't have any tried and tested advice regarding your SIL. Perhaps, if she asks you what to do, you could turn the question around and ask her what she thinks might work for her little one? Maybe, she's not interested in you solving her problem, but just wants to talk about her difficulties? Maybe try some reflective answers. When she complains about wet beds and lack of continence, perhaps you could asking how this makes her feel or suggest that she might be feeling tired with all that extra washing? Let her talk it out and she'll probably come up with her own solution?

Hope it all works out for them both (and for you) :)

[OnTheBottomWithAWomansWeekly]

If you can possibly get her to get him checked for diabetes, please do (if it hasn't been done already), my friend did this recently (7 yr old, soaked a double bed to the extent that there was a pool of wee under the bed) - usual blood sugar reading 7, child was 30. Couple of days off a serious coma according to the doctor.

It's a very simple finger prick test with immediate results - at least if it's ruled out that's one less thing to worry about (hopefully it is not likely to be diabetes as the problem seems to be ongoing re the wee, which it wasn't for my friend - it was so unusual she went directly to the doctor the next day)

[Rowgtfc72]

DD wet the bed at night, very sound sleeper, peed like a racehorse. Only thing that saved the sheets were Tesco size 6 nappies (she was five yrs old) with the sides done up and stepped into like pull ups so she didnt feel like a baby. Definitely would suggest a diabetes check though.

[SummerRainIsADistantMemory]

Dd is 8 and wets massive amounts every night.

She's on bedwetting meds now and is still wetting most nights even on the double dose.

There's not much that can be done tbh once physical causes are ruled out. Dd was under paeds for daytime wetting so they keep seeing her every few months but it hasn't made any difference.

[party245]

Excessive night wetting is a symptom of constipation/impaction so it is worth making sure that this is all OK, in my experience it is possible for parents to be unaware if symptoms of constipation are not classic ie no straining or hard stools.

Day wetting or the need to wee frequently (ie more than once an hour or more than 8 times per day) are also symptoms of constipation.

[Glittertwins]

DS has no problems on that front, party but its good to be aware of it thanks :)

[MummaMinnie]

This is our experience and it's amazing how common this is. No one likes to talk about it though. My DD was 8y8m when our GP agreed that she should be referred to the enuresis clinic. She had never been dry at night and her previous go at not wearing PJ pants (at 7.5) had resulted in almost a week of twice a night wetting. Every night she wet her PJ pants and sometimes they leaked too. We received a form from the clinic about two or three weeks later and sent it off. Literally the next day or so, she came into our room in the morning after waking up and said that she'd forgotten to put on any PJ pants that night and was dry! We decided to go with the flow (so to speak) and not put any on again. I double deckered waterproof sheets and sheets so that if she did wet the bed it was quicker to wipe her down and change, strip the top layer and get her back to bed. She was dry for the whole first week but then had episodes of being wet every other day or two sometimes a bit longer. Her first dry night was in the August and we went to the clinic at the end of October. We got all the advice about drinking LOTS during the day (lots of nagging from me about drinking at school) and then stopping 1.5 to 2 hours before bed. No blackcurrant juice etc etc. She was on 2 sachets of Movicol a day so not constipated. No lifting either. She was dry by the next appointment in December. More than 10 nights in a row is considered dry. Now she wakes up and goes to the toilet. If she is really tired or not well then we might get a wet bed but it's no more than about one night a month now. I think for DD she just wasn't ready until last year.