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PLEASE help - 8 m.o. ds started screaming/screeching incessantly and I can't stand it much longer

(9 Posts)
firstimemum Fri 26-May-06 18:49:50

He seemed to discover this new noise of screaming / screeching in the loudest, most ear-piercing shrill way a few weeks ago and ever since, he does it all day. I cannot stand it, so much so that I have actually felt violent towards him (don't worry, you don't need to report me to social services - I would never do anything to hurt him). The only advice I can find in my books is to say "NO" and look stern when he does it - I've been doing this and also clapping loudly to distract him but neither is working. He does it when he gets tired or bored but trying to put him to bed or interest him in something doesn't work - he is just intent on screaming at me. I am starting to feel that I cannot go out with him - he screamed continually on the bus yesterday, then inside the V&A Museum when I visited to see a couple of paintings, then today when I met a friend for a coffee. He is making me a prisoner in my own home and I am feeling very upset and disliking him. I just yelled at my husband the moment he walked in the door from work and ordered him to get ds out of my sight.

He has always been a fairly intense and demanding baby but smiley and generally happy too.

Has anyone has this problem and what is causing it and what can I do??? Please please please let me know if you have any thoughts. Thanks so much. xx

Twiglett Fri 26-May-06 18:54:30

say no put him down and turn away from him for a minute

every single time he does it

I'm sorry .. kids do strange things

he's doing it because he's just discovered he can .. and when he does it mummy does really funny things like go red in the face and shout and clap her hands ... cool ...

trick is to ignore them

then ride out the next few weeks whilst he readjusts

unfortunately he'll just move on to something else

gingernutlover Fri 26-May-06 18:55:09

god you poor thing, dd went thru a phase of makling an err err whinging noise and I thought that was bad - to be honest I ignored her as much as poss (obviously checked nothing serious wrong) and she stopped after a few weeks, not much help sorry

she has now started screaming only at grandad - see other thread

sparklemagic Fri 26-May-06 19:13:24

I would agree, ignore him completely when he does this, walk away so he feels the lack of attention....

my DS did this too, he LOVED screaming at the top of his voice though thank god he only seemed to do it when we stripped him off for his kickabout on his changing mat at bathtime - but we used to blush with shame, thinking the neighbours would be reporting us to social services cos of the noise!!

And actually it didn't go on for very long - a month or two at most. It's all a phase

CorrieDale Fri 26-May-06 20:00:16

DS did this too. We ignored it, every time. He soon stopped.

firstimemum Fri 26-May-06 20:25:54

Thanks. Will try ignoring it and see how I get on. Living in a 2 bed London flat makes it a bit difficult to really ignore it though. Maybe I will dig out those earrplugs I bought in the early days ... DH and I have just had the most dreadful nasty fight but at least I think it might help him realise how difficult it has been. I don't have any of my family in this country, so there is nobody to give me a break and dh is a senior lawyer so works long hours. Thanks hugely for answering my thread on a Friday night when you could be doing much more interesting things!

suzi2 Fri 26-May-06 21:36:33

My DS did this around 5 months for a couple of weeks and then it passed. But it has reared it's ugly head the last few days again - he's 9.5 months. No answers, but I know what you mean about it getting to you! DH was saying this evening that if we walked past a house with that screaming going on we would probably call the police!

littleDevils Mon 29-May-06 14:15:42

hi! i've just joined. i need help controlling my 8 month old little one i cant talk it anymore, i cant leave the room without him screeching his head off let alone prep dinner!!! any advise

CorrieDale Tue 30-May-06 13:44:08

'more interesting things' lol! Earplugs sound like a fine idea. No eye contact might help too - i.e. no reward at all for screaming. Perhaps you could try dumping him in the pushchair and wheeling him around the block - you'll get a few stares but I find that the screech doesn't sound quite so loud in the open air. Have you joined any toddler groups? i know you still won't be getting a break but a) they might give him something else to think about than the interesting noise he can make and b) you'll get some sympathy/make friends wtih the other mums. And keep repeating to yourself: this is a phase and will pass. And finally, senior lawyer or not, get your DH to spend the afternoon (out!) with DS while you sit in a quiet flat with a book/dvd/your own thoughts. You're working full-time too, remember, and YOU have a much more stressful/responsible job.

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