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I need a strategy to deal with DS's unsociable behaviour.

(6 Posts)
Mum2Ela Fri 26-May-06 13:31:45

He is only 18 months and is v gorgeous,does v sweet things like wave when we leave anywhere, gives lush cuddles etc etc.

But he has this other side where he bites (not me, other children), and pulls hair etc. This usually isn't when he is having a tantrum (thankfully they are few and far between). It looks like he is doing it to get a reaction and its completely unprovoked, although sometimes if the 'victim' is his sister it may be borne out of frustration.

Thing is, he is so young, I feel there is very little I can do. But I am not sure if this is the wrong way of dealing with it, that perhaps I should 'nip it in the bud' so-to-speak.

But is he too young at 18 months to know any sort of consequence?

TheMammy Fri 26-May-06 13:34:03

Mine is 17months and when he hits or bites his sister I remove him from where they were playing at and put him in his cot for a minute time out. Not too young to learn that no means no IMO

wessexgirl Fri 26-May-06 14:17:29

Friend's ds was like this and she made a point of just removing him from the room/situation and then lavishing attention on his 'victim'. He got no attention and the behaviour disappeared after a couple of months.

Mum2Ela Fri 26-May-06 14:27:44

TheMammy I have been doing that is he does something soon after we get up in the morning, but I am not sure if I want to get into the habit of doing that as we are out of the house a lot during the day so its not practical. It does seem to work in the mornings, though, but I wonder at that age how much of a connection between the 'crime' and punishment they make.

Mum2Ela Fri 26-May-06 14:30:33

Wessexgirl I had tried that, but it usually ends up with DS balling his eyes out and positively throwing himself at me for a cuddle. I might try it again tho, I am thinking that consistency is the key.

It bugs me that sometimes when he does something people say that he does it because he is a 'boy', 'oh, thats what boys do', 'he's a proper boy' etc. etc. Grrrr, I don't want my 'boy' doing things so I am embarrased to take him anywhere for fear of having to constantly apologise for his behaviour.

MrsBigD Fri 26-May-06 15:06:16

dd was a biter and hitter and I usually removed her from the situation and withdrew attention. It either did eventually do the trick or she grew out of it. I'll never know.

IMH at 18 months they're definitely old enough to understand NO. DS now 20 months at that age definitely knew when he was doing something he wasn't supposed to do as he kept looking at me with an angelic innocent grin and then did it anyway.

At the moment we are having a problem with pushing/jealousy... then again his sister (4.5y) pushes him so he pushes back but now he initiates and then she gets terribly upset... siblings eh?

I know what you mean with the 'proper boy' remarks though... so annoying... boy = naughty??? why?

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