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The psyche of a 4 year old ... HELP! (rant)

(4 Posts)
MrsBigD Fri 26-May-06 09:39:28

DD was in hysterics this morning about going to nursery so had to keep her home with the nanny.

Quick pre-amble: DD started saying she 'hates' nursery a couple of weeks ago and first of she wouldn't tell me why - got a rather 'mature' 'I don't want to talk about it'. Also she started to hide and cower in corners if being told off (what she considered being told off) at home which is unusual as so far she simply stormed into her room, slammed the door and screamed at the top of her voice to let us know that she disapproves of being told what to do

Finally it came down to another child at nursery being a bit naughty towards her as he kept pushing her away from 'his' friend.

Yesterday morning it came to a point as just before nursery opened that boy chased dd away and pushed her over (had a thread about that yesterday) so both I and his mother intervened and he was made to apologise.

The teachers were made aware of the 'situation'

Then this morning dd wouldn't even be bribed to go to nursery but went into hystericals so I decided to leave her at home with the nanny and went in to have a chat with the teachers.

They were baffled! Before yesterday they hadn't noticed any problems between that boy and dd. Also dd always seems happy, friendly and nice at nursery, causing no problems and following instructions etc. Even on days where I have come in and told them 'she's under the weather/grumpy/tired etc.' the teachers wouldn't have known any different hadn't I told them.

Not sure whether we were talking about the same child

So the question is why does dd suddenly seem to be down trodden/worried/defensive as opposed to her usual rather confrontational stance?

Is she 'playing' mama or might there be any other underlying cause? Not that I'm thinking that there is anything sinister, but it's just so weird and confusing as I really don't like dd seing unhappy - especially if I don't know why she is unhappy.

Anybody on here has insight into a 4 year old psyche? if so please enlighten me

thanks for reading

Jimjamskeepingoffvaxthreads Fri 26-May-06 09:51:18

How close to starting school is she? ds2 - 4- due to start school in September, still enjoys nursery but has turned into a disagreeable strop at home. he argues about everything. He's not really downtrodden, but will get in a stew over anything. I know a numberof children who have been like this at his age, and tbh I think he just needs to start school.

I'm not sure from your post whether that is a possibility, but could it be?

FioFio Fri 26-May-06 09:52:57

Message deleted

MrsBigD Fri 26-May-06 10:00:08

Hmmm that could be it

She's due to start 'big school' in September.

She's a December 2001 baby so actually one of the oldest in nursery but also the smallest.

It's just so weird because the teachers said that she looks like she's enjoying herself at nursery.

ARgh being a parent sometimes really s*cks

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