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How long would you leave a 2.1 year old tantrumming?

(13 Posts)
nappyaddict Wed 22-May-13 13:15:26

2.1 year old is crying because I made her sit at the table to eat her dinner. She is still sat on the chair, not eating her dinner and crying. I am just letting her get on with it until she calms down but how long would you leave her be if she doesn't calm down within a reasonable time?

FunnysInLaJardin Wed 22-May-13 13:17:10

10 minutes, after that I would go and say 'do you want to stop crying now' and see where we were with that particular tantrum.

MerryMarigold Wed 22-May-13 13:19:05

Hmmmm...I would give her max 5 minutes at the table. If it becomes screaming, I would say, "I don't want to listen to this, you can go to your room until you calm down." Then take upstairs to room.

nappyaddict Wed 22-May-13 13:25:19

It's now been 10 minutes and have tried to distract her out of it but have succeeded in making her worse. How long would you leave her in her room to calm down?

Tee2072 Wed 22-May-13 13:29:11

Until she's done. My son once lost it for nearly 2 hours.

MerryMarigold Wed 22-May-13 13:29:23

I would leave another 5 minutes and then go in. My dd was like this but is now 4.8 (it's getting better!). Now I leave her until she is calm, but can't remember at a young age what I used to do. I think with hindsight I wished I had left her there until she calmed down, however long it took. I would go in maybe every 5 mins so she knows she is alone, but that she has been isolated.

FunnysInLaJardin Wed 22-May-13 13:30:35

yep, put her in her room and wait for her to get bored of it

MerryMarigold Wed 22-May-13 13:30:50

Also, don't try and distract her out of it. That's giving her positive attention for doing something wrong.

fluffyanimal Wed 22-May-13 13:30:57

Well now you've started with this one you'll have to see it through but in general I think it's a bad idea to get into battles over meal times. Did she not want to eat her dinner or did she just want to sit somewhere else to eat it?

As for the tantrum, I'm well mean I am, I ignore until they stop.

nappyaddict Wed 22-May-13 13:33:41

She wanted to eat it in the living room but I don't allow this as we have cream carpet and we live in a rented house. I even tried putting a huge shower curtain down in there once but she still managed to get stains in the carpet. Kitchen is tiled so easily cleaned up after.

MerryMarigold Wed 22-May-13 13:34:30

If she is anything like my dd, anything can set her off when she is in the right mood. 99 times out of a 100 she would happily sit at the table and eat her dinner, but for whatever reason if she decided she wanted to eat it on the floor and I said no, then that would be the 'reason' for the tantrum.

LousThighBurn Wed 22-May-13 13:37:28

I'd just go and ask if she wanted a hug, if she says yes then I'd hold her and explain why she cannot eat in the living room because you do not want the carpet to get dirty. Maybe try siting her at the table again in a few minutes.

awwwwmannnn Wed 22-May-13 13:37:40

i generally leave my DD for as long as it takes tbh- she does't tantrum very often anymore (shes 2.6) but when she has one she goes for it big style! i leave her in a safe place and go sit down somewhere away from her and tell her mummy;s here for a cuddle when you've finished....

i found the more i tried to distract her or pacify her, the worse it made it - by ignoring her its over and done with in a minute or two at the most. it is hard and its bloody well horrible, but you have to be consistent and not "reward" the tantrum with attention grin xx

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