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toddler with a short fuse

(3 Posts)
madeit Mon 13-May-13 21:15:02

My son is 3 and a half. He is keen to be with other children and generally mixes well. He tends to become aggressive and very angry when there are disputes over sharing. Today at playgroup he spent a long time putting together a magnetic array of vehicles then pulling them along. Inevitably a smaller child came along several times (different children) and walked straight through them. On each occasion my son was furious and ready to throttle the unsuspecting toddler. I was watching like a hawk and fortunately got there just in time. I have explained to him that no matter how angry he is he cannot hit. I have agreed with him in that it is tough (this situation) but hitting is not the response. I have told him to come to me. I do not want to stop taking him to playgroups or having friends ove r to play but it is stressful.
He gets really angry with me too. When he disagrees with what I say or when I help him to get dressed or ........the list is endless he is livid.
I am not a particularly aggressive person. My son is not hit or physically hurt as a punishment. Friends sometimes say children learn by example and I agree with this sometimes but my child isn't getting this from me. I am not perfect I do get angry with him and occasionally shout but not in an extraordinary manner.
How to I teach my child to control his temper? he is an only child and I am a single parent.

mumtolilh Mon 13-May-13 22:02:13

One thing I will say is forget the terrible twos!!! I think 3 is the worst age for jealousy,anger,temper all sorts of things!!! I bet by the time he is 4 he will be just fine & learn how to control himself a bit more!!! He is still learning so does his 'testing'
I'm sure you are doing just fine so hang in there!!!
Oh these kids are hard work lol but so worth it ;-) xxx

madeit Tue 14-May-13 20:00:28

Thanks I appreciate your comments. I don't want to leave it to chance that he will be less reactive as he grows older I would like to know if there is anything I can actually do or read which might give me ideas or help my son cope with frustration more constructively. He spends a lot of time with me and other adults so is reasonably articulate.

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