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Behaviour/development

16mo DD does as she's told for DP but not for me!

4 replies

OhWhatAPalaver · 10/05/2013 11:36

Over the last week or so, dd has started ignoring me when I tell her 'no' or not to do something. Example, she keeps opening the drawer in the living room with all her nappies in it and pulling them all out. She used to move away when I caught her doing it, I'd say 'no' in a firm voice and tell her to move away and she would comply. However she now just carries on even if I tell her not to. I have to physically move her away. If I stand at the gate she just blatantly carries on when she knows she is doing something wrong! Yet if dp catches her doing it then she is quick to move away and will even put all the nappies back in the draw and close it if he tells her to! Why does she obey dp and not me? I feel like I have no authority, I don't know how to change this, I do not want a disobedient child who ignores me and walks all over me, help!

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Tinkerisdead · 10/05/2013 11:42

I dont know if this helps but i have a 4yr old who can be wilfully disobedient. I also have an almost 16m month old who empties the cupboards, throws food whilst staring me in the eye laughing, she pushes the dvd player to get the drawer to slide out, she bangs her body against the doors to make them rattle. All whilst laughing at me.

Dh says no and she stops and cries. Ive learned from the older one, she's being naughty. The little one really doesnt get it its all a game that gets a lovely reaction from mummy.

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Tinkerisdead · 10/05/2013 11:43

Sorry i mean the older one is deliberately naughty you can hear the cogs whirring.

But it shows up how the 16m old really just finds it all a game of cause and effect.

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MoonlightandRoses · 10/05/2013 12:08

Cold comfort I know, but it could be because she's going through a phase of being more secure with you, so therefore is less distressed/impressed when you ask her to stop.

I do also think having a deeper voice helps too - frequently sometimes if all else is failing I drop the pitch on my voice which seems to mean a bit more attention gets paid to what I'm asking.

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OhWhatAPalaver · 10/05/2013 14:36

Hmm thanks for the replies. Been having a think and I'm not sure if this is a coincidence but it seems to have started happening around the same time as she's started asking for things. Also she never goes in said drawer unless I go out of the room for a min...

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