Advanced search

mummy's boy (toddler)

(4 Posts)
cheeseycharlie Mon 29-Apr-13 15:56:56

20mo DS is a bit of a mummy?s boy. When he was under 1yo he basically cried all year unless I picked him up, and with my nerves on the edge I took the ?easy? way out, picked him up, and basically went through life doing everything one-handed with a baby on the hip. So DH helpfully likes to remind me that now I only have myself to blame! Whatever.
Now DS is a bit older he?s not totally clingy but he always wants me. He LOSES IT if I pick up another child younger than him, in response I try to introduce him to the other child and get him to say hello, but DS just tries to attack them and is inconsolable until I leave the other child alone and spend a long time reassuring him. If DS is being told off by DH he comes running to me as though I'm going to go easy on him (I don?t).
I think DS sees himself as the only baby in my world and that I will always allow him to be a baby. But that is reading an awful lot into the mind of a toddler, isn?t it?!
He has a big sister, they get along fine, zero jealousy incidents between them.
I know it?s not the most serious problem in the world but I feel like my own behaviour to date has probably made things worse, so right now I don?t trust my own instincts. Any thoughts? Or good books on the issue?

WaitingForPancakeDay Mon 29-Apr-13 19:27:53

I think all toddlers are jealous when their mummy picks up another baby. It's not like you've prepped him for 9 months about the birth of a new brother or sister, you are randomly cuddling a strange baby. Of course he is jealous. It's normal. My DD is 24 months, adores babies, but wouldn't tolerate me picking up someone else's at the same age.

It's not a rod for your back that you've picked him up. He's attached to you and you are his default source of comfort. You sound like you've done a fab job and he is secure with his mummy. I don't think you need a book. You sound like you're doing just fine. Give him time and you will become deeply uncool and his dad will be flavour of the month!

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Mon 29-Apr-13 20:07:29

Well he's practically still a baby himself! My 5 year old DD gets all hmm if I carry on with another child too much. He's normal!

cheeseycharlie Mon 29-Apr-13 20:18:50

Ladies, thanks for giving me a bit of perspective! I can't help fretting because DD was never like this, she couldn't give a hoot if I hang out with other babies and was fine settling into nursery and never ever hung around my ankles to be picked up for no reason other than a cuddle - so in contrast it looks to me like he is very emotionally needy, but as you say he is probably just being a normal baby/toddler. On the needy end of the normal spectrum perhaps, as I don't see other kids behaving the same way when I'm out...

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: