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Help - my 3 year old can't / won't / doesn't stop!

(2 Posts)
vladthedisorganised Mon 08-Apr-13 11:08:54

This is a vent - and possibly a question on whether I'm alone in this?
3yo DD is (of course) delightful, intelligent, and generally well mannered. There are things that she's really good at that I wouldn't expect to be automatic (like saying 'Thank you for inviting me' if she's been round to someone's house, for example), so in many respects I shouldn't have a problem.

- She won't sit still, ever. If we sit down to dinner together, which we try to do regularly, she'll wriggle and squirm all the time and try to climb on to the table. Lots of zero-tolerance, firm 'no's, instructions to sit nicely all seem to have very little (if any) effect. Funnily, she seems OK if she eats on her own. Taking her to a restaurant is a nightmare as I don't want her running around, but she won't sit still to draw, read or colour if waiting/ bored- she just wants to be off. Church services, weddings (shudder) and any event where she might be 'bored' she sees as a track and field event. Often she'll use 'I need the loo' as a way out of sitting through anything at all. I know she can sit still, as she can sit through a whole film or concert without moving once, but for any other situation we get at best squirming and at worst running everywhere.

- She is getting increasingly defiant. If I tell her to do something, regardless of what it is, I'll get a shouted 'NO!' back. If I say we need to leave somewhere in 5 minutes (say), I get the shouted 'NO!' plus running off.

- She seems to need no sleep whatsoever. She's dropping her daytime nap, I try to give her plenty of outdoor exercise every day whatever the weather so she can let off steam, but sleep is not forthcoming. Generally she'll be up at 6, go through till 9pm without any sign of sleep, and be up repeatedly between 11pm and 3am with an 'I need the loo/ I need a drink/ my pyjamas are creased/ my blanket's crooked/ etc' Trying the rapid return technique but nothing seems to help.

She has had some disruption with her Grandma dying in January and the arrival of a new sibling later in the year, but I've tried really hard to do the 1-1 time, the talking about both events and how she feels about them - nothing appears to make any difference.

Thanks to anyone who has read the epic whinge - is this a 'this too shall pass' or a 'call the shrink' moment, do you think? Needless to say she sailed through the 'terrible 2s' with few scars for either of us.

Goldmandra Mon 08-Apr-13 11:39:06

Have a look at this video which might help with her difficulty sitting still.

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