Reward charts and stickers - any tips?(8 Posts)
DD is 2 and we're thinking of using a reward chart to help encourage good behaviour patterns - and also to help DP and I be consistent in our parenting.
At the moment I'm thinking of using it for simple things like trying/eating new foods, sitting at the table for meals, going to bed nicely and tidying up. She's generally a well behaved child but tests boundaries sometimes.
I have to admit that with DP and I both working full time, there are a lot of occasions when we give in for an easy life so I'm also this will help to keep us on the straight and narrow too!
So, has anyone found reward charts unhelpful? Can you give me any tips on getting the most out of a chart?
I have found them very useful as long as you only have 2/3 targets and nothing else factors into it so it remains clear. Also they need a reward quickly so they can see the purpose, the first 1/2 times anyway. So start very very achieveable. I have tried two or three ways. We did, a coin chosen from mummys purse to go in her "penny pig" and then a toy shop trip (funnily enough though she always chose 2p despite better ones to choose from - big and shiny I guess!). We did the traditional sticker chart - chose a sticker and stick it on and when you have a line or whatever, get a magazine or similar. We are currently (she is now 3) doing a grid (just a piece of A4 split into squares) where she can draw on a smiley face and when the grid is full she trades it in for a toy shop trip. She loves choosing which square to colour in and who to draw (not that they look overly face like!). Our three targets currently are: - dressing self as much as can, sleeping all night and staying in bed until sun comes up (linked to gro-clock) and eating meals nicely. If other good behaviour or bad happens it is not part of the chart at all (although it is dealt with) so that those three are the focus for us all. Depending on how much '2' she is will be a factor I think as before 2.6 I found my DD not overly interesting and she would say "dont want a sticker anyway!" Good luck!
Interested rather than interesting!
Also - I found choice is key - choose their own sticker, own place to stick it on the chart etc (initially I am a bit ocd so I kept telling her to stick the sticker in the next available spot and we fell out and just got stressed with each other..toddlers love control don't they! - just me being a bit mad but you might be similar (she says hopefully!)
You don't want to reward everything. Also if she's well behaved generally why not just be firm in setting boundaries instead? Also will a sticker chart deal with inconsistent parenting?
We've found that stickers are enough of a reward in themselves, I don't think a 2 yr old will get the idea of saving them for a bigger reward. currently using a Peppa pig sticker book for DS2 (2) toilet training. 1 wee on the potty = 1 sticker of his choice.
Used a star chart for DS1 (then 4) to be dry at night, made a big night sky picture then he got to choose a sparkly star sticker - he seemed pretty pleased just to be filling up his sky.
you are probably right, thinking about it Bakingtins. I dont think she minds overly about the bigger prize, the sticker/coin/chance to draw a face seems to make her happy in itself...she doesn't mention the bigger reward, I do! - Maybe I will stop!
For my 2 year old getting 5 stars on the reward chart got a sticker for her and she has responded really well to that. At the minute we are working on putting toys away, helping mummy with her chores (loading the washing machine and dishwasher) and sitting nicely at the table for meals. She can also get random rewards for kindness, sharing and general good behaviour.
Bakingtins, I am stealing the star idea for DD
She is only just 2 so I think the sticker in itself is enough of a reward and she would respond well to that.
Good points about keeping it simple and achievable, we'll pick 2 or 3 targets only.
I'm hoping it will help us too as if DD demands a sticker and wants to do the task, then we'll make sure it's done rather than opting out because we're tired or something. I think that might only kick in once DD gets the hang of the rewards though and we really need to kick ourselves into line!
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