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At the end of my tether, does DS have ADHD or similar?

(9 Posts)
sunnysss Thu 07-Feb-13 22:15:28

Hi, My DS is driving me crackers! He is age 6 in year2, but has a July birthday so is young for the class. (I also have DS age 10 and DD age 9). He is meant to read for 10 minutes and do some spellings once a week. That is about it, which is just about right for his age, BUT, in those 10 minutes of reading he wriggles and looks around and talks about anything else, and, coughs, clears his throat and sniffs-constantly. I have started to record this, anything from 40 - 65 times, now that is a lot! He has gone to the dr and there is nothing wrong with him.
His teacher says he is capable but has problems concentrating!!!! His spellings are a max of 8, e.g. first, girl, hurt, circle - so not too taxing, but he will not practice them and when he eventually puts pen to paper I can hardly read them. It has taken an hour to write 8 words before now! His writing compared to the others in his year is right at the bottom, he is right handed but does still wet the bed, aprox 2-3 x week) The coughing etc continues. He does this in the day too, but not so often. (He went through an eye rolling and excessive blinking phase which I took no notice of and this stopped after about 3 -4 months!!!)I have now put a limit of 10 minutes of an evening, if we get them written all good and a game of snakes and ladders or something. If not, I read to him for 10 mins and to bed, no games. The teacher thinks he may benefit from tinted glasses to reduce the glare??
He sleeps, eats, runs about and gets on with his siblings.
What should I do with him???

plugplant Thu 07-Feb-13 22:44:09

Sounds like he has developed several tics which is his way of coping with stress. Could you not move the 10 minute reading time to another time when he's not so tired? Is it fun for him if not, could you find a way to make it fun?

Some young boys in particular find an academic setting difficult. Is there a Forest school you could send him to instead? I knew of a mum who had the same issues as you, including the bed wetting. She changed to a state Forest primary school and the transformation in her son was dramatic.

He sounds a dear little boy unable to cope with all that pressure. If you are unable or unwilling to change schools then you could get him assessed but if I were you I'd ditch the reading and spellings and just concentrate on doing fun things at home where he can truly unwind and de stress.

Six is terribly young. In some European countries they don't start formal education until 7. My instinct would be to give him love and fun at home and make no academic demands on him whatsoever.

Carmelcrackle Thu 07-Feb-13 22:49:37

Get a check for diabetes. Similar symptoms to my neice. Google childhood diabeties for more info and see your gp.

sunnysss Thu 07-Feb-13 22:58:00

Thank you. I'll scrap all school stuff over half term and see if the coughing etc stops. Lots of fun, games, arty stuff and will monitor. If it continues, who would you see for an assessment? I have no idea? Perhaps he is worried that he can't read like his siblings? Will have a little talk and see what he says. At the mo, he says he can't help it. Ticks - you are right! Will look at diabetes too, he does say he is thirsty all the time at night, I try to limit drinking water after tea time, but when he is begging for water I have to give him a sip! or a Zip as he says!!!xx

thewhistler Thu 07-Feb-13 23:00:06

He's a bit too young for any testing to be definite, but when he is a little older check dyslexia. Tinted glasses might help this anyway.

Does he say the letters wriggle around?

Do his bs and ds, gs ps and qs get muddled? What about his 5s and 3s?

But does he like being read to? If so, read lots and lots, and get him to learn easy poetry, and start him liking books , with pictures and knowing you can find things out from books.

V important not to put him off books. Learn from me. I failed.

sunnysss Thu 07-Feb-13 23:27:19

He loves it if I read to him and seems to prefer much younger books eg 1 sentence per page with loads of pictures- so he reads them to me if here is no school stuff. My brother has dyslexia as do his children, but teacher insists he hasn't and can do it. Concentration and application were the words she used to describe him smile

plugplant Thu 07-Feb-13 23:51:06

Your little boy sounds gorgeous. How much outside play does he get? How much unstructured play (ie without you or anyone else organising his activities) does he get?

I really hope you give him the down time he needs; and even if it is tempting to compare him unfavourably academically with his sibling please don't, especially if the teacher has no cause for concern.

I am a Beaver leader and the attention span of 6 year olds is markedly different. Please don't seek to label your child or push him, the tics are something I would want to address and get to the bottom of more than any thing else.

Msbluebozooka Thu 07-Feb-13 23:59:17

Hi sunny my 6 yr old used to throw himself on the floor if I mentioned spelling and reading. He hated anything to do with school at home. So eventually I did the fun approach, reading to him,ignoring the outbursts and pretended I was the pupil and he was my teacher. It seemed to work, but don't get too cut up about it they all come on at different paces. I think the coughing is a way of getting out of doing the spelling and reading. And they can sense when we're wound up. Good luck, I'm sure he'll be fine , don't understand what the teacher was saying about tinted glasses? Also my Ds would pretend he couldn't breathe? Just before reading and spelling practise. He is doing a lot better now but only because I've relaxed.

anonymosity Fri 08-Feb-13 02:01:56

I think sometimes its just the pressure. I read recently about the physicality of learning for some boys - its better if they stand up while reading and are allowed to jiggle their feet, hop about etc if it helps them concentrating. Nothing to worry about though.

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