DS1 is 3 in March, DS2 is 15m so there's a 19m gap. I really wanted a small age gap as I hoped this would help my children have a good relationship - I know it's probably as much down to personality though.
DS1 has been unimpressed with DS2 since his arrival - he was defrosting slightly just around the time that DS2 started crawling and grabbing and now DS1 spends most of his time wailing and shouting when DS2 comes near him or touches him. To be fair I can see that DS2 is quite annoying as he seems to make a beeline for DS1 and whatever DS1 is playing with, he'll then crawl all over him, try and take the toy and bite him on occasions. DS1 will try and push DS2 over though as yet, hasn't been too aggressive towards him, it's more just the constant moaning I find so hard. DS2 on the other hand squeals in delight when he sees his big brother but that can't last for ever as he works out that his brother is not similarly well disposed towards him!
We try and give them both 1 to 1 time with each of us as well as try and encourage simple games all together but I just find it all so dispiriting when DS1 seems to lack any positive feelings about his brother. Very occasionally DS1 will show a bit of affection towards DS2, eg; give him a hug when he's crying but those times are few and far between.
All my friends seem to have older siblings that have adjusted beautifully to little brothers and sisters within about a week of birth and love the little brother or sister dearly, kiss them goodnight, sing to them etc. I feel quite sad and jealous when I see these relationships so I suppose I'm hoping for some reassurance that things might get better as they get older. I bought Siblings without Rivalry but most of it seems to apply to older children. Anyone got any tips on improving their relationship? We live in the middle of bloody nowhere so if they don't get on they'll have a long walk to find someone else to play with!
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DS2 is 15m old and DS1 still doesn't like him - will they ever get on?
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apricot72 · 18/01/2013 20:10
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