8yo facts of life / covering up(3 Posts)
My DD has recently turned 8 and I strongly suspect it is time to have a facts of life chat with her. Questions have been coming up that I can't easily sidestep any more so I think it needs a proper sit down and explanation. Probably more about her body, with just a bit about the practicalities at this stage.
I've seen others have left the chat to much later but just wondered if others thought this was appropriate?
Secondly, I am wondering how to handle the issue of nudity with her. We're not naturists or anything, but our children regularly see us naked - in the shower or something - and I think it's important that they're not ashamed of their bodies. However she is largely very body un-conscious. So she will regularly sit with a skirt on and legs wide apart just flashing her knickers at everyone. The other day she was in her nighty and playing noughts and crosses with a friend of ours and I realised because she won't sit still for a second she had hitched her nighty right up and was in danger of flashing everything to him. She can sometimes be shy when changing around kids at school or at dancing, but at home she won't think twice about just stripping off. Which is fine. I like that she has the open-ness and confidence. But as she is getting older I am torn about how to handle this because I think that some family members will find her nakedness inappropriate and be uncomfortable. I have started gently directing her to another room to change and have mentioned the need for privacy sometimes, but how best to convey to her that she needs to be more body aware of what is appropriate, without making her self conscious?
I've always found it easier to just open the lines of communication rather than 'have the chat' which seems a bit loaded and heavy duty for all concerned. She's going to have lots of questions soon but go at her pace and let her steer it.
There are some great books around which might be good starting points for conversations. One of the books my dds have is this one but there are lots to choose from, we have a couple of others too.
Regarding the stripping off - just chat to her and mention it from time to time as and when required. She'll get what you mean regarding appropriate times and places etc.
The Babette Cole book where Babies come from or whatever is age suitable, might help you Birds & Bees.
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