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Biting. Help!

(17 Posts)
phantomhairpuller Wed 17-Oct-12 18:20:28

DS, 18mo, just bit me sad it actually really bloody hurt and took me completely by surprise and I reacted by smacking him albeit gently I know I know, totally the wrong thing to do but as I said, it really shocked me. I followed the smack with a huge hug so if that's not mixed signals I don't know what is!
Assuming this is the start of a phase, how do I best react in future?

alpinefresh Wed 17-Oct-12 18:21:16

i am eagerly waiting the answer to this too......

phantomhairpuller Wed 17-Oct-12 20:33:17

Anyone?!

33goingon64 Wed 17-Oct-12 20:51:45

DS bit me a few times - he has now moved on to pinching. I have read that the best reaction is to say 'stop, we don't bite' and make you eyes really big - then quickly distract them with something 'ooh what's that outside the window?' etc.

plipplops Wed 17-Oct-12 21:55:57

OP the same thing happened with DD. She bit my shoulder so I smacked her on the back, I felt terrible but it wasn't hard, just a reflex the same as if an insect had bitten me when I wasn't expecting it. She's done it maybe one more time (in another 18 months) so it's not a habitual thing, so don't panic yet. I agree with what 33's saying though.

CrackerSnacker Thu 18-Oct-12 21:49:45

My 2.4 DD was biting me up to 10 times a day over the summer. Would make me sooo angry. Then bought Teeth Are Not for Biting on Amazon and read it every time she bit. Totally worked. She's probably bitten me twice in the last month. Good luck!

Annie456 Fri 19-Oct-12 07:53:19

My 13 mo DS bites me all the time. I can't seem to escape it and I try to be really aware of when he's bitey but there's no much room to move away when I'm carrying him up the stairs in one hand and something else in another. Or just giving a bed time cuddle, or ruff-playing 9on the floor. He bites me 4-5 times a day and I'm covered in bruises. I know he's teething and I try to offer him alternatives to bite. Sometimes I react instinctively and shout - which makes me feel terrible. I usually point my finger and say "no biting" very firmly. He usually understands but I think he thinks its a game. I have tried everything and am at my wits end with it (I even once tried biting back as suggested by MiL and a few people on here.
He doesn't bite other kids, my friends, or DH-just me. Sorry for the hijack, just know how you feel!

FamiliesShareGerms Fri 19-Oct-12 08:02:59

Not for very little ones, but biting is the one misdemeanour that means an instant spell on the naughty step (rather than getting a warning first)

Interestingly, both DS and DD have gone through biting phases that were entirely limited to me and DH. I wonder why this is

phantomhairpuller Fri 19-Oct-12 09:26:23

Thanks for the replies. I'm starting to think it might be something he does in excitement. We visited family yesterday and he had a great day, but there were occasions where he got over excited, ran up to someone (in this case my dad and my nephew) and bit them!
Have taken to telling him in a very firm voice, that biting is naughty. Will watch this space I guess blush

Fifimoo Fri 19-Oct-12 10:08:55

My DS went through a stage of biting and it was only me (thankfully), I largely tried not to react but saying that we don't bite etc, until one day he bit so hard that blood was drawn and i cried a lot in pain, rather extreme way to go about it but he hasn't done it since, I am thinking that I should have cried in the first instance, he was devastated that he had hurt mummy.

Annie456 Fri 19-Oct-12 18:44:35

Hi fifimoo, how old was your DS when he hurt you? I quite often cry when he bites as it is so so so so painful (sometimes I just can't get him off!) but he doesn't seem to care!!! He's only 13mo so maybe too young?

Fifimoo Mon 22-Oct-12 13:36:45

Hi Annie456
He was approaching his 3rd birthday and should know better, it was a problem that we had a lot when he was much younger which i thought had resolved itself, then he started again, i think that it all originated from nursery, I think for him it is all about frustration (he was trying to write his name at the time) he hasn't done it for a couple of weeks now so I am hoping the major crying (on my part) has stopped it, also he was really worried that I would have to go to hospital and mama in hospital means no mama. Probably not much help, but a lot of it is age related, I was always kind of thankful that it was just me and not other children or carers.

Emsmaman Tue 23-Oct-12 21:21:30

Bumping thread as I've been told today that DD is trying to bite others at nursery. So far they've managed to intervene but I guess it's only a matter of time until she bites someone. I know it's normal as she's been bitten a couple of times but I'm still upset to think of her doing it to someone else's DC!

Sargesaweyes Tue 23-Oct-12 21:28:58

Ds has just started biting (14 month). My bloody mum started it really by letting him gnaw on her fingers!!

I tell him very sternly 'no biting'. He then laughs at me and try's again. I think distract is probably the only way.
Will keep watching this for ideas.

Halfcups Wed 24-Oct-12 14:54:07

All three of mine have had short phases of biting me and others. Horrible and upsetting but does stop. I found it to be when they were either; teething, non verbal, frustrated, angry,playful, excited. Biting back is cruel and gives mixed messages to a child. Firm 'no' and put down if carrying them helped. Giving the child whose been bitten attention helps the biter see the impact of their bite. Parents do tend to get a little hysterical about biting but it is for almost all a normal developmental phase. If it does not pass and is coupled by other destructive and challenging behaviours which are not age appropriate it may be time to talk to health visitor/GP/ SENCO. Bless these little angels and their high spirited ways! X

cassiopia12 Wed 24-Oct-12 14:59:09

its normal. just scream or say ouch and say 'no biting'. they grow out of it by about 3

k2togm1 Wed 24-Oct-12 21:24:34

I'm not saying that ds doesn't ever bite, but I tried saying 'no biting' and it didn't seem to work, what has worked though is saying 'no biting, give kiss!' Followed by me wriggling out of his biting range and kissing him.
His biting was always related to teething, and he's now cutting his four canines and so far we've had not a single bite. (Now I've said it he'll bite tonight).

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