DS who is 5, in Year 1 managed a 2 hour tantrum yesterday afternoon after school. He was screaming, punching, kicking, trying to break things - completely out of control.
As far as I can tell he behaves really well in school, he seems to be doing well and talks about his friends. There is nothing much different at home. I think he is tired and he was probably in need of something to eat - but I don't know what triggered the tantrum, and I have no idea how to deal with it once he's in full on tantrum mode. He has had 3 big tantrums this week now.
I am losing confidence with how to deal with him which obviously doesn't help because that must make him feel worse. I find his anger which is directed towards me, and his violence quite upsetting. I also am very scared of him doing damage to something (door/car etc) that will cost a lot of money to fix as money is quite tight at the moment, so I know I get cross when he is attempting to break something. Clearly me getting cross is equally unhelpful.
I really need some strategies to deal with him and some ways to help him deal with his anger before he gets to the epic stage. Also is there always some underlying problem I need to sort out that is causing this uncontrollable rage, or is it just normal 5 year old behaviour and he just needs ways to try to control it?
Are there any issues at school - has the work level changed as he's gone up a year? My other suggestion was going to be an earlier bedtime - and you've said that he's tired.
Also, when did the tantrum start? could you give him a snack at school to eat on the way home and to boost his blood sugar levels so tantrums are less likely.
Ultimately though, i think 5 is old enough to know not to do things because he's damaging stuff. I would be taking sanctions - removal of privileges etc - if he breaks anything. Talk to him after he next does this - ask him how he felt and did he realise what he was doing?