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Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Behaviour/development

"Stranger danger" at 3 months??

12 replies

LittleWaveyLines · 05/10/2011 08:48

My DD is no longer pass-around-able! She will only tolerate being held by me, my DP, DM and DFIL. Someone has suggested that she may have been roughly held by a stranger - I can only think of her vaccinations as an example!

Could this be stranger danger at 3 months? I thought it was an 8month thing? Is it normal?

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TheProvincialLady · 05/10/2011 08:54

She is now old enough to show a preference for people she knows. That is all.

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welliesandpyjamas · 05/10/2011 08:55

Who told you that?! :) Maddest thing I've seen on here for a while (and it's getting madder every day!). Sometimes babies cry when other people hold them. At any age. For any number of reasons. Just take them back politely and reassure them with a mum hug.

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LittleWaveyLines · 05/10/2011 09:00

Phew! Thank you... (Although it's not so good that she wont let MIL hold her! )

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ForYourDreamsAreChina · 05/10/2011 09:00

Of course it's not stranger danger. It's separation anxiety and peaks around 6-12 months (unfortunately the time when most mothers go back to work!)

Please don't start giving your child complexes already.

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ForYourDreamsAreChina · 05/10/2011 09:01

Mine wouldn't let MIL either!

(not daft these babies )

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LittleWaveyLines · 05/10/2011 09:01

Ha hA!!

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violetbubbles · 05/10/2011 10:48

Sounds like she's just making her feelings known :) My DD was exactly the same and I was getting lectures from EVERYONE (including, my mum, MIL, checkout assistants etc) about how I don't want to raise a clingy baby, I used to smile and nod to their faces but think "oh eff off" in my head. I honestly think it was just her personality starting to shine through. Now, at 15 months she's is fiercely independent and i think it's hilarious when she puts her hand up and shakes her head when people try to pick her up like a little baby. Sounds like yours is going to be a strong, independent little lady too - enjoy! :)

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booyhoo · 05/10/2011 10:50

yes it is stranger danger, your baby is a genius and is aware that paedophiles exist on every corner. congratulations.

FFS.

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LittleWaveyLines · 05/10/2011 11:23

booyhoo yes I knew it sounded ridiculous, but it was a paediatrician who said it so..... no need to be quite so sarky. Stranger danger is also used as a separation anxiety type term apparently, as well as being a "taught" thing.

violetbubbles hmm yes she is already quite headstrong about certain things! Oh dear....

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booyhoo · 05/10/2011 11:35

my mum is a midwife, she told me to stop BFing ds1 at 6 weeks because clearly i was running out of milk. HCPs can say idiotic things and still be HCPs, it doesn't make what they say any less idiotic.

i felt the sarkyness was necessary FWIW.

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welliesandpyjamas · 05/10/2011 11:41

I wonder sometimes whether medical professionals get taught so much that they sometimes mix stuff up. I have heard the term stranger danger used by a GP but in reference to the way children from age 1 ish upwards have a healthy temporary wariness of new people. Maybe the doctor who said that to you was referring to the same thing but in the wrong age group?

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LittleWaveyLines · 05/10/2011 11:43

welliesandpyjamas yes I think that was what she was meaning - wariness of new people.