The terrible twos...kicking and hitting

[mumwithbumandtum]

Any and all advice will be much welcome...I've got a 30 month old (2.5 years) and a 14 month old and of course there are jealousy issues. My growing problem however is that the 2.5 year old repeatedly hits and kicks, knocks over, pinches and pushes the little one, whether I'm there and watching or not. He will also do this to me & my husband and other children. He used to be so gentle!! If I'm there, I take him aside by the elbow / arm and ask him what he's doing and why, that it's not acceptable and I put him in the naughty corner for a while, he then is asked to apologise to the little one and is then allowed to play again. The problem is that this is no skin off his nose and he does all the "punishment" without a fuss. So, I've taken it further, I've put him outside in a seperate room, I've closed the door, I've left him there alone for 2 or 3 minutes, and still he is unfazed, he says sorry, gives everyone a hug but two seconds later will knock over the baby again. I've tried ignoring him, so not punishing him but picking up the baby and giving him lots of attention. This only seems to make the older one more determined to do something naughty, and of course I've tried a smack on the bottom, but he just smacks me back. I can't abide smacking but at this point I had no idea what else to do, how to get through to him. What is the solution? How do you get through to a toddler baby that he has to behave nicely? What is THE most effective method of discipline? I've also tried confiscating loved items btw and whilst that definitely gets a reaction, the item is forgotten about within 2 minutes so I'm not sure it really works. Thanks in advance!!

[AKMD]

I didn't want to read and run but I am a bit stuck for advice.

Is the reaction the same if it's your DH doing the talk/removal?

DS is an only so far but he was very into pinchign so we've been working hard on getting him to stroke instead. It's very funny when he runs up to me, bursting with excitement, and relieves his feelings by stroking my arm :o