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Nursery - your advice please??

(4 Posts)
montymoocow Mon 26-Sep-11 13:16:41

My (only just) 3 yr old has just started a seemingly good, caring and well respected local nursery. He was upset to be left at first but after a week or two seemed to settle more easily.

Doubts - seem to be A LOT of children within fairly limited space. Many little ones walking around crying (most are comforted but some trying to do puzzles etc. whilst crying). Obviously it's early days and the staff all seem very caring. However, when I picked him up last week he was trying to tell me something which had happened whilst playing outside but not managing to explain things too well. So, I phoned up the nursery and spoke to a member of staff who had been outside with them and was told that they had been playing outside with a group of older ones (nearly 4's and just turned 4's I suppose), and that the boys had started playing rough, kicking and hitting each other. She said mine had been with them and had been told off.

I feel really upset as he's never displayed any tendency to play rough, and he seemed really upset by the whole thing as he's still mentioning it now. He even has older siblings and so is used to older kids around, but it's just not like him. I wonder if the little ones should even be playing with the older ones. I've explained that hitting and kicking isn't good, and when you play you must keep your hands and feet to yourself.

Fact is - I don't want him turning into a rough kid and I'm obviously not there to explain things and put him right - I just have to hope that they'll do this.

My other worry is that the nursery is a series of separate rooms and that sometimes there are kids playing in a room and there is no adult supervising (although I guess and hope that all rooms are properly staffed and perhaps they just popped out of the room).

I suppose what I'm saying is that, am I being picky and over sensitive, or are my doubts well founded?

Any advice please?

Wafflepuss Mon 26-Sep-11 14:34:40

I wouldn't be comfortable leaving my dc at a nursery where wee ones were left to cry, crying children seem to be comforted straight away at my nursery, if lots are upset at dropping off time the staff sit with them on their knees and at their feet until everyone is happy. Bit heartbreaking to think of little children sobbing whilst doing puzzles. And its definitely not ok for kids to be unsupervised in their rooms, should be one adult per 3 or 4 children at all times depending on how old they are.

Tgger Mon 26-Sep-11 21:57:31

Hmmmmm, you don't paint a very happy picture! If there are lots of new children then there may be more unsettled than normal, but you'd expect this to pass as they settle.

As for older ones/younger ones- at my daughter's nursery they do play together but it's quite small (although loads of space!) and there is plenty of supervision. I think you have to go by your instincts. As I said, you don't paint a great picture of the place! Lots of space is a priority in my book so I wouldn't be happy with anywhere with lots of children in a small space- likewise I wouldn't like my just 3 year old being told off and upset just because he happened to be playing with older ones.

It's a 1 to 8 ratio once they turn 3 but my daughter's nursery has more as they have children from 2 (1 to 4).

I would go on how your son is finding the nursery generally and your overall impressions- (which from what you say don't sound great, but perhaps there are positives that attracted you that are still there?) See if he is thriving- my daughter came bounding up to me today- running in from playing outside, clearly a very happy child. That's how it should be in my book.

montymoocow Tue 27-Sep-11 09:54:53

Thank you for your advice. He seemed happy to go today but I did have a chat with them there and they were very nice and kind about it.

I suppose I shall have to just wait and see how things go.

Thanks again to you!!

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