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Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Behaviour/development

How often does your 2 yr old cry in an average day?

18 replies

cfc · 08/09/2011 10:14

I know we are in the throes of the terrible twos, but I am reaching the end of my tether with him. It seems like he cries for 70% of the day. Moaning and whingeing, oh the constant whingeing....

Please give me your experiences of your 2 yr old. Save my sanity [hopeful emotion].

OP posts:

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Octaviapink · 08/09/2011 12:30

IME most of the 'terrible twos' can be avoided by making sure they get enough sleep, food and fresh air. Toddlers have very small reserves and need to resupply regularly! Do you find that it's worse around specific times of day?

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Earwiggy · 08/09/2011 13:26

Mine has gone through very whingey stages, I find all you can do is attend to the things mentioned in the post above and then be very clear and consistant about other things. In other words if you cave in to the whinging once they learn it works and whinge all the more.

I think all children are different though and whilst some might be angels at 2 they might be more difficult later. It's a bit simplistic to say it can all be avoided, might be the case for some kids but not all.

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trixie123 · 08/09/2011 14:54

I agree that keeping them busy is the key. DS is unbearable if he has to mooch around the house all day but if we have a day like today (swimming, playgroup, nap, seeing friends, dinner, bath, bed) it is minimal. I do find that little things can help to pre-empt and avoid a tantrum. Eg if he gets hold of the remote and it is taken off him cue huge meltdown so I put it where he can't get it in the first place. If he throws his plate on the floor when he finishes eating he has to be told off so I hold the edge of the plate when I can tell he is getting near finishing. I don't pander to the tantrums or whinging but if it doesn't inconvenience me to walk one way rather than another then I go with his choice. I figure its a difficult age and provided he doesn't always get what he wants we will come out the other side relatively unscathed!

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Galena · 08/09/2011 19:44

DD (2.4) doesn't cry often but does whine a bit - however, it's generally when she's tired or hungry. If it's been a while since she last ate I'll offer her a biscuit or some fruit and often that stops it. Also a change of scenery helps - going out to play in the garden or even popping to the supermarket just give her something else to do.

The whining I simply say 'Don't make that horrible noise please, speak properly' and then ignore until she speaks properly. And by dinner time, if I know she's shattered, I tend to try to avoid problems by pre-empting or distracting if I can. We have to do daily physio with her, and sometimes that upsets her - so we bribe her with Night Garden or Tom and Jerry!

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Iggly · 08/09/2011 20:24

Loads of crying if he's tired or hungry. If he's fed and well rested he's easy to please!

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Octaviapink · 08/09/2011 20:54

I agree with Galena about not tolerating the horrible noise. DD can switch it off if she wants, and I usually support her efforts with a snack or some distraction.

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Tgger · 08/09/2011 22:21

Try changing what you do.

Make sure he has enough food and sleep. If you haven't been doing many activiities do more, if you've been doing loads, do less. Try to have some really good quality time every day doing something you both enjoy- a swing/reading a book/playing with cars/doing play-doh- whatever floats your boat. Do it whatever mood you're both in.

Good luck! It too will pass! We tend to have the odd bad day which is horrendous but generally good days with the odd tantrum.

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EmmaRoyd · 08/09/2011 22:29

OP, I think you were hoping someone would tell you they were going through the same thing rather than people telling you to make sure DS isn't tired and hungry!

You are not alone, my DD is exactly the same at the moment, a crying, whinging, tantrumming hell cat. I too am at the end of my tether.

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EmmaRoyd · 08/09/2011 22:32

that should have been a question mark BTW not an exclamation mark.

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Tgger · 08/09/2011 22:35

Yes, actually you're right. And sometimes they do just cry all day because the world is not suiting them. It's tough being 2 you know!

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EmmaRoyd · 08/09/2011 22:37

and last week she was so filled with rage she ran at me and hit me in the face

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Tgger · 08/09/2011 22:45

Oh dear! Poor you. Luckily I have older brother to get the brunt of her fury!

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EmmaRoyd · 08/09/2011 22:56

Tiredness is an issue though. OP does your DS still have a nap? my DD refuses to nap even though she is tired. Anyone have any tips on this other than trying to have some quiet time?

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HoHoLaughingMonster · 08/09/2011 23:18

OP you have my sympathy. I hated 2, it was a miserable time. DD was like this. Permanently. Regardless of amount of sleep, food or fresh air. It got to the point where I stopped taking out to busy public places as she was sooo bad and it was just humiliating.

I think it was frustration, and a strong will. And not understanding much about the world and why she had to go in her car seat, wear her shoes to go to the park, hold my hand when crossing the road etc.

I couldn't reason with her as she didn't really understand, and once she got worked up a UFO landing on the front lawn wouldn't have distracted her.

She also had (has!) a very low boredom threshold and would whinge when bored. She is and has always been VERY vocal

She's still a little hot head at 4 but at least I she can understand my explanations and understands there are rules and social norms that must be followed, and lying on the floor in Ikea screaming because Mummy won't let you push the trolley down the escalator is not one of them.

So it does get better. Gradually. and then you have another

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EsmeWeatherwax · 08/09/2011 23:19

DD2 who is currently two, cries about once or twice a day. Angel.

DD1, otoh, started crying and whinging pretty much constantly on her second birthday. Now, at 4.5, she occasionally stops to draw breath. Tiredness and hunger definitely make her worse, but then so does not getting to go in the bath first, or the wrong spoon with her soup. Drives you mad, but distraction and lots of fresh air tend to be the best remedies, as well as lots of sleep and regular refuelling. (I am exaggerating slightly btw, she has gradually got better, but it's a slow process, I learned to appreciate the good days, and try and forget the bad ones. Wine helps)

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olibeansmummy · 09/09/2011 16:18

He's cried twice today so far and luckily hasn't been moany at all but it varies. He's another with a temper though and does hit :(

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MegBusset · 09/09/2011 16:23

God mine cries loads, I have found that developing cloth ears helps a lot. I don't pander to tantrums either, and find a regular change of scene helps.

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cfc · 10/09/2011 13:46

Thank you all for your replies, i am so sorry I've not been back before now! Useless.

I concur totally that hunger and boredom really affects him. Also, the other day we did loads. Art, sculpture, gardening, baking...and we laughed all day. Apart from the suicide hour, yanno, that time between 4.30 and bath!!

You are so right, activities, fresh air and not tolerating it is the key. We've just hung a swing off our tree and that is hours of entertainment for him, yippee!

Thank you. It is indeed nice knowing I am not the only one!