im at my wits end please help.(5 Posts)
Ok so ive 22 week old twin boys who are in their own room.
They go down to bed at 7..and are usually asleep within 5 minutes.... they go down in their cots for naps every day...my problem is the one of them wakes FREQUENTLY through the night. I mean frequently.... last night it was 1am, 1,45am, 3.20..cried for 20 minutes...he was picked up and immediatly stopped (we try not to pick him up when he is crying, during the night, unless we know there is something wrong) then when I placed him back in his cot he woke immediatly and cried again.... my partner then came in a did the same thing.He slept until 5.... then screamed again, so we out him into the bed with us I know i know we arent meant too. And we really are trying to encourage healthy sleep, BUt its been like this for a month now! before the 4 month mark he slept from 7 - 5.30...
I have tried EVERYTHING. Except controlled crying, I dont know enough about it, and am thinking something has to give, Its affecting alal our days. The baby is shattered and grizzly throughout the day, Im exhausted, my DP cant function in work.... HIs brother ahs recently started to be woken by him.
I havent let him cry it out.....as in controlled crying, yet.... we are boht there when theys tir and I think that the problem is us. He doesnt know how to get himself back off to sleep..... as we always settle him , as we are desperate to go back to sleep.
He naps no problem, and knows the difference between night and day, and like I said goes to sleep no problem at all....its juts helping him stay asleep. Its not hunger, sickness, wet nappies etc... too hot or cold...trust me this is my obsession at the moment. Given him teething gel, incase he is teething. etc....
Has any one done the controlled crying... when you did it did your baby use a dummy and did u put it back in every time you went int to settle them... need to know.
An tips at all..... !! Thanks ...much appreciated.
Does he use a dummy at the moment? Our DD started wakening several times a night when she lost the dummy. Nothing else was wrong. In the end we had to go 'cold turkey' and remove it, because like yours she was so grumpy during the day and became a different child when it was gone. It was a tough few days but it worked!! Sorry, this is maybe absolutely no help if he doesn't take a dummy at the minute.
As for cc, people say not to do it until at least 6 months. Think that's roughly the age DD was when we used something like it for dummy removal purposes!!
You have my sympathy!! Good luck!!
If he doesn't have a dummy yet, don't give him one - you'll only have the nightmare of him losing it and wanting it replacing constantly!
you said he slept well til 4 months? I've heard a few on here mention a "4 month sleep regression" so maybe you could look further into that?
I can't really advise you on helping him get back to sleep as we never had an issue with DS, but DD doesn't sleep no matter what we do and she's 3.4!
Who has told you that you aren't meant to take your child into bed with you? Cosleeping is perfectly normal, entirely natural (which putting a child in their own room isn't) and, when done properly, entirely safe too. Ensure your sheets are tight fitting, get rid of the pillows, tuck the duvet into the foot of the bed so it can't go over baby's head, maybe put them on top of the duvet and under their own blanket.
This link may help Dr Sears Cosleeping Research and Advice
Do you have a local Children's Centre? If so, it's worth asking them if they are hosting any advice session on sleep problems/training. Or ask your Health Visitor for advice.
There are various methods of sleep training, not just controlled crying. I found Andrea Grace's advice to be helpful for my 13mo, but not sure if sleep training is right when they're as young as yours are. Maybe have a look at www.andreagrace.co.uk. I've just posted a long reply to another thread in the Behaviour/development section (called something like Daughter (16 month old) keeps waking through the night) about the advice she gave me in case that helps.
I hope things improve for you very soon.
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