Help- my 7 year old DD has become a teen during the school holidays!

(16 Posts)
Pendulum Sat 27-Aug-11 21:29:21

Well, thankfully she hasn't crashed my car or stayed out all night yet, but her behaviour towards the rest of the family has been remarkably teen-like for the last few weeks.

She has become obsessed with a certain series of books and has stayed in her room reading them for hours a day. When not reading them she is re-enacting the stories using her toys. I only know this because I have startled her a couple of times by going into her room. I am not allowed to observe the game or join in, and she won't tell me what she's doing because "it's private". Neither am I allowed to read these books to her as she wants to do it herself.

More generally she is being scowly and grumpy until teased or chided out of it. It is nothing serious and a good tickle usually sorts it out, but she seems to have a default mode of 'mumble and grunt'. The other day I accused her of treating the house like a hotel and thought- I knew those words would come out of my mouth at some stage, but not quite this early!

I've asked if anything is bothering her or making her unhappy and she says not at all, and i can still get a cuddle out of her if I ask nicely! I wondered if it is common for girls of this age to go through such phases? I know there is nothing 'wrong' but I feel a little put out at the lack of contact she seems to want with the rest of the family.

debivamp Sun 28-Aug-11 04:04:03

you are not alone - My DD is suffering the same thing - 6 going on 16.

rejectOfAllah Sun 28-Aug-11 04:12:22

I have a seven year old who I can lose for hours in Horrid Henry books. I generally can't even get a cuddle even when I ask nicely... she's always been Mummies girl in that respect, so it's no major surprise.

ripstheirthroatoutliveupstairs Sun 28-Aug-11 08:48:05

Mine is older, but a definite teen. Out of interest OP, what books are they? At that age I stopped DD reading HH and a ghastly American series whose name escapes me.
DD would take on the characteristics of the main person. She was horrible.

MillieMummy Sun 28-Aug-11 08:57:21

We are having the same issue with my DD who is 8. I put it down to the fact that she has bee spending time over with a friend the holidays who she doesn't see during term time - different schools. She has picked up some of the friends characteristics (sp?) - sorry to say they are not nice ones.

Bonsoir Sun 28-Aug-11 09:01:38

My DD too - she won't even be 7 until November. We went shopping for winter clothes and were not leaving the shop without winter shorts and knee high boots; she refuses to wear a one piece swimsuit, is obsessed with a pair of leopard skin sandals, and spends hours getting ready to go out, choosing her jewellery and handbag. She spends a lot of time listening to Katie Perry on her iPod.

What comes next?

peachsquash Sun 28-Aug-11 09:07:14

I remember DD acting like Tracey Beaker at around that age.

Girls do seem to take on the traits of characters on TV/in books or those around them at that age (shame its only the negative characteristics too hmm)

Pendulum Sun 28-Aug-11 09:28:47

Phew, not just mine then!

ripstheirthroatout it's the Harry Potter books. She is a very good reader and is undaunted by a 500 page novel. I'm actually relieved that she has moved on from Horrid Henry, I had to ration those in the end (and I don't let her watch or read Tracy Beaker because she visibly morphs into Tracy within 5 minutes!)

Thankfully we are not into the teen clothes/ music thing yet. DD would wear the same old pair of jeans every day if I let her and listens to her one JLS album on a loop.

I'm curious whether she is under the influence of some kind of hormone, or whether she is 'acting' the part of an older girl (trying an attitude on for size.)

Bonsoir Sun 28-Aug-11 09:31:45

Pendulum - I put it down to hormones! My DD doesn't watch TV (ever) and lives in an environment where children are very much treated as children in terms of dress, activities etc. But she has an internal radar that notices what "big girls" do, and she wants to do it too!

OhYouBadBadKitten Sun 28-Aug-11 09:32:34

When dd was that age her teacher wanted to talk to me as dd kept rubbing her back and muttering about it being sore. I had to explain that she had been reading 'What Katy Did' grin

ripstheirthroatoutliveupstairs Sun 28-Aug-11 10:32:52

Bloody HP, when DD read those a couple of years ago, any twig or piece of spaghetti became a wand and a bathroom towel could be a cloak of invisibility.
I caught her watching TB a couple of weeks ago. She isn't allowed to read the books and most JW is out too.
She told me a few hours later that she wanted to be taken into care because it's fun angry.
I did speak to her about how it isn't fun, but she isn't convinced.

cjbartlett Sun 28-Aug-11 10:42:04

My ds is the same
Tbh I'd rather he be engrossed in books and a make believe world than on his ds all day or watching tv actually he's watching boomerang right now

pugsandseals Sun 28-Aug-11 15:38:51

dd (9) is also obsessed with Harry Potter. She has tries the 1st 2 Percy Jackson & is still obsessed with all the Fairy books (although less so thank goodness!). Her behaviour is horrendous at the moment - same secret games you talk of, won't sleep until at least 10pm & is getting grumpier & less & less able to do anything that involves a brain (including crossing a road). Do you think it could really be HP? If so I will ban them now!

pugsandseals Sun 28-Aug-11 15:50:25

Actually, come to think of it, her obsession is just as directed at Narnia stories - maybe I should ban them as well?

madwomanintheattic Sun 28-Aug-11 16:05:20

oh, it gets better. when they go back to school, all this new-found teen-ism gets competed out amongst all the 7yo girls to see who's going to be queen bee for the year.

is she in an infant school? if so, in another yer she'll be the youngest in the junior school and will forget it all completely. grin

it isn't hp btw - dd1 read them all in the summer hols between yr1 and yr2 and wasn't affected at all. it's just a 7yo girl thing. not uncommon at all. grin

tracy beaker otoh...

TheChildThatGivesAdvice Wed 26-Aug-15 11:18:50

As a teenager, it sounds like she's doing what we call 'fangirling' ... it basically means that she's very into a certain series of books. It could be a phase, but it might not be. If you want to spend more time with her, maybe you can try reading them yourself and then talking with her about them.

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