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3 and a half. Been there, done that? Help me get the t-shirt please.

(11 Posts)
Munzle Thu 25-Aug-11 20:25:44

So, is this "last half of the year before a birthday being awful" thing true? DD turned 3.5 this month and today I've had the grand total of 6 meltdowns over some pretty daft things. She seems to want to defy everything that I say, for no real reason, and the throwing/kicking things in frustration has reached new levels. Is this normal and how do I get through the next 6 months? I used to be a calm and patient mum, but that was when I had 1 child! Raging pmt the last few days has meant me shouting at her, which makes me feel bad, and no doubt makes her feel and behave worse sad

Pamplemoussse Thu 25-Aug-11 21:08:48

ach it sucks doesn't it

anyway, brisk and breezy is the way to go

crank down the shouting, it doesn't help and just gives you a sore throat

perfect the broken record technique

ignore what you can, praise where you spot it, walk away/turn off attention

don't get drawn into yeah but not buts

it will pass I promise

Besom Thu 25-Aug-11 21:19:32

I am, as I write, listening to a bedtime refusal tantrum and look at the time! I'm just making it worse so I've left her to it.

I think she might have just tired herself out, it's gone quiet, poor soul.

Makes you feel like shit though.

Munzle Thu 25-Aug-11 21:38:23

I already am a broken record. I must have said 'brush your teeth please' a gazillion times today easily. Looking forward to week after next when pre-school starts back, but hate myself for wishing away my time at home with them. She wants to wear the same dress every single flippin' day!

OliviaMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 25-Aug-11 21:44:48

Nodding in agreement here.
My 3.5 y/o DS has just out of nowhere started sucking his thumb in the daytime - and has regressed on potty training and having been amazing and v affectionate suddenly started to be envy of DS2 who is 9 m/o.
<adds "patience", "bright and breezy" to online grocery shop in hope>

HerMajestysSecretCervix Thu 25-Aug-11 21:47:55

I am trying bribery.

wompoopigeon Thu 25-Aug-11 21:51:55

I recommend a large gin and tonic. And starting the bedtime routine much earlier than normal if they kick off in the evening. DD is a million times easier to put to bed at 1830 than 2000. Overtiredness is not a good thing.

JoyceBarnaby Thu 25-Aug-11 21:58:04

Thank you for this thread. DS has been a little horror recently and I've been feeling like a really rubbish mummy. I do try not to be shouty but sometimes he's such a little git. Therefore, I'm afraid, I can't offer any help or advice - just some empathy!

HeiferLump Thu 25-Aug-11 21:59:05

Another one feeling that pain! DS turned 4 a wee while ago and I have to be honest and say that 3 was a million times harder than 2.

I don't think for a second I am qualified to offer any advice but hang on in there because it does pass smile

petisa Thu 25-Aug-11 23:28:31

Oh god it's so hard isn't it! So glad I found your post OP. 3.4 year old dd is v hard work at the moment, she's driving me mad. She's so jealous of her 1 year old today sister, who follows her around adoringly all day long trying to join in, bless her. Dd1 shouts NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! in her face alllll day long and hits, kicks and nips her, not hard admittedly, but just hard enough to make her cry. Then she smiles and looks satisfied. She loves her sister and they have great games together, but most of the day involves shouting and kicking and crying etc etc

She hits, kicks and nips me and her granny too, again, not hard but enough to hurt and laughs too and when I explain for the eleventy billionth time that I don't like it and that it hurts, and ask her why she does it she says because it's funny and laughs. She goes on the naughty step and hates it and says sorry, but she just goes on hitting and kicking. She knows it's wrong, but it's like she can't help herself...

She shouts at her grandparents and babysitter when they come in and tells them to go away. When they ask her what she's playing or doing she shouts "Nothing nothing!!" She's so rude it's embarrassing. When I ask her not to do something she does it just to wind me up over and over, like bang cupboard doors or throw toys. I can't have her on the naughty step all day can I? Roll on nursery school, ashamed as I am to say it!

petisa Thu 25-Aug-11 23:32:27

Sorry OP I just ranted there and offered no advice but it was very cathartic! I have no advice, I'm afraid. I think if I gave dd2 away to someone else and played with dd1 all day long and never did anything else, then she would never act up grin but as a mother who's doing everything on her own at the moment as dp is working abroad, I just don't have time to play all day. I think nursery will be great as she'll be having fun and playing there instead of watching tv in the mornings here while I feed dd1 to sleep for her morning nap/wash clothes/make lunch etc etc

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