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3 year old tantrums getting worse- is this normal?

(7 Posts)
yummymummy345 Fri 19-Aug-11 13:08:49

ds- 3 yrs, always been a challenging child imo but seems to be getting worse. Yesterday ended up hysterical over tidying up before bed, tried to make into a game who could do the quickest tidying etc. today, ended up hysterical as had beef sandwiches for lunch (gave him option - he chose beef). have now put him to bed to nap.

Whats best way you have dealt with difficult child?
I have praisd him for the good, ignored the bad behaviour- but what to do when they start throwing their toys at you and hitting you- find that difficukt to ignore (but I do), I walk out of the room so he doesnt get a reaction.

He knows how to be good, if I say we ar going to a particular place he wants to go , he will behave as he know we wont go if hes naughty, Even seen hin pick up a toy to throw then thought better of it.

He has tantrums some days about putting shoes on, cleaning his teeth, washing his hands and on and on and on tbh the calmness I am expected to show is irritating as underneath he makes me v angry.

Anyone been through this also and any advice? cant see what im doing wrong/differently

Choufleur Fri 19-Aug-11 13:13:42

Think it's just normal. He will grow out of it. I would just keep ignoring the tantrums.

nenevomito Fri 19-Aug-11 14:37:00

The best way I have found when in the house and I don't have to get anywhere / do anything is to ignore it. Its particularly effective at 3+ years as it drives them bonkers.

If there are certain things that happen every day - e.g. get up, brush teeth, get dressed, put on shoes - then it may help to have a time table that your DS can see and follow. Then you can refer to it and he can see what he needs to do. The ubiquitous reward chart and the promise of a reward is also very effective.

If you have serious concerns about him having tantrums, or you think they are above and beyond the norm, then could you talk to your health visitor and see if she has any suggestions as I found mine quite useful (although I know not everyone is as good.)

2ddornot2dd Fri 19-Aug-11 23:15:38

Sounds as if you have a very normal son, and a very good parenting technique to me. Keep at it. Is he just getting fed up in the school holidays? Can you think of more things to keep him too busy to tantrum?

yummymummy345 Sat 20-Aug-11 10:37:10

Thanks, was just having a bad day i think- he was sick so think it was down to him feeling a bit poorly.

pictish Sat 20-Aug-11 11:23:07

I think it's pretty normal. For example, ds1 had the worst tantrums at 4.

My ds2 is 3.8 now, and is only just starting to grow out of having tantrums over everything. he still has them though - just with not quite so much frequency. He's quite controlling and likes things his way and just so....which is tough titty, as we will not be dictated to by a three year old.

I find the naughty step works well when he kicks off. I say 'stop screaming and crying, or you will have to go to the bottom of the stairs for three minutes'
Inevitably, he will keep going, so off he goes to sit on his own for three minutes.
9 times out of 10 it does the trick nicely.
If it's a full on hooly, another three minute stint will finish it off for good.

Try it.

yummymummy345 Mon 22-Aug-11 08:00:28

Thanks Pictish bet your pleased that phase is almost over with! will try the naughty step, with consequences....

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