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More than separation anxiety ?

(4 Posts)
samsmother Wed 27-Jul-11 23:08:50

hi my ds 11m has suddenly become very very clingy day and night. I thought he went through a bit of separation anxiety at about 9m but it didn't last for long and was nowhere near as distraught as he is now. I went back to work 7 weeks ago and there have been no problems with him settling into his new daily routine without me. However since Saturday he needs me to be with him at all times. I work in a school and now on summer hols thank goodness otherwise I dread to think how things would be. He doesn't want to stay with my dh (and they usually have such a great relationship) I'm not trying to go out and leave him but can't even go to the kitchen or have a quick bath as he doesn't settle and spends the whole time getting into an awful state. Night times are also v hard he won't settle unless on the boob and wakes up after 20 mins back in his cot screaming if I'm lucky enough to have even got him back in there. He's spent the last few nights in my arms in my bed as that's where he seems to settle. Could this be more than just separation anxiety?

thisisyesterday Wed 27-Jul-11 23:11:09

is he doing anything developmentally? they sometimes get upset and more wakeful/unsettled when they do something big like learning to walk and stuff..

otherwise i would wonder if he is coming down with something?

AngelDog Wed 27-Jul-11 23:14:41

He'll be working on the 46 week developmental spurt when there are huge changes going on in babies' brains. The weeks preceding developmental leaps are characterised by being 'clingy, cranky & crying' and sleep goes down the pan too.

I'd do whatever you can to get through it with as much sleep as you can for as many people as you can, and I bet it'll all improve once the leap is past. (It's usually at around 46 weeks from the LO's due date.) My DS always becomes grumpy, clingy & stops sleeping / will only sleep with feeding when working on these leaps. (There was another spurt at 9 months so that was probably the cause of the behaviour before. The next one is at 12/13 months - before the 55 week leap.)

You can read about the effect of developmental leaps on behaviour / sleep in The Wonder Weeks.

samsmother Thu 28-Jul-11 21:54:59

thanks thisis and angel, today has been another clingy day. ds sobbed when i went to the bathroom earlier and was so distraught he couldnt even finish crawling towards me it seemed it was just too much for him. it upset me so much to see his so apparently distressed. last week he did take 4 steps so maybe things are happening because he's about to walk? i thought maybe he was becoming ill but when he has me he is absolutely fine so dont think thats the reason. Angel thanks for the link am going to have a look now

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