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anxious 8yr old

(8 Posts)
popsocks Tue 19-Jul-11 20:52:11

My dd is 8 and im not sure how to help her. Recently she has become really clingy to me, wont go to her grandparents house or to play with her friends, except if they play in our garden. She is also terrified of animals, especially dogs and cats. She runs in screaming from the garden if a cat appears, a cat only has to walk along the path and she screams. When out walking she takes a wide berth from dogs walking past, even if they on a lead, sometimes she trys to jump into my arms. She has always been frightened of animals, so this is not new, but it seems to be getting worse. Its like she is extemely anxious all the time and im not sure what to do. I think im going to speak to our gp and see what he says because it is impacting on her life daily. An example i can give you is she had an opticians appointment 2 days ago, and she cried all the way there, screamed once inside and tried to run out the door. Once the optician sat down and talked to her she calmed down and let her do the test. My dd wears glasses and has since she was 3yrs old so an eye test is something she has regularly. I cant think of anything that has happened to make her worse and her teachers say she is fine at school and nothing has happened there. I have tried talking to her, getting her to explain how she feels. Im finding this really frustrating and maybe she senses this. I guess i want to know has anyone else experienced this with there child and how did you help them. Sorry this a very long post and thankyou in advance for any replys.

BarkingHarriet Tue 19-Jul-11 20:59:33

First this is not unusual - my dd1 went through this at about 7.5, and dd2's showing tendencies now at 8.1.

After doing what you've done and asking on MN I was recommended a book called "what to do when you worry too much". It's like a workbook - there's a bit to read then either a picture to draw or something like that. Dd1 found it very helpfull and I'll use it again with dd2 if it starts to be a problem.

Hth

BarkingHarriet Tue 19-Jul-11 21:01:36

what to do if you worry too much

twofalls Tue 19-Jul-11 21:04:42

Nothing to add but will watch as my lovely niece is going through a similar thing. She is terrified her mum is going to go away and leave her, sobs at school to the point of being sent home, won't visit grandparents, etc. My brother and sil are really worried. She is 7.5.

Hope you get some help. I will go and look up the book.

Carrotsandcelery Tue 19-Jul-11 21:10:34

My ds has anxiety problems and the "What do do..." series has been very helpful.

A fellow mumsnetter has just tonight recommended helping him with the right combination of Bach's Rescue Remedy drops so that may also be worth looking into.

We have also noticed a significant difference using high doses of Omega 3 oils (also recommended by a mumsnetter).

The book teaches tactics to put in place when anxiety is taking over though and is therefore very useful.

popsocks Tue 19-Jul-11 21:21:13

Thanks, ive had a look and read the reviews, each one of them have said how helpful the book has been. Ive just ordered it. Thankyou.

BarkingHarriet Tue 19-Jul-11 22:32:59

Just also wanted to say I understand entirely how you're feeling, how powerless you feel about it all, no matter how much you reassure them they still seem to be overly worried.

My dd1 would lie awake at night crying for hours, she would sleep on a mattress next to her sister as her own bed was too scary (and too high up for me to join her when she was really upset). She'd scream hysterically when i left her at school, cry when she came home, and just worried about everything.

I know it's easy for me to say now with it in the past, but it is another phase, they will get through it, my dd1 is now 10.7 and although she does still worry about things more than other kids, she knows how to express those worries and who to talk to to get the reassurance that she needs. She also now recognises when she's worrying unreasonably about something.

Thinking of you all, i know it's horrible.

festiemum Wed 20-Jul-11 10:11:50

Thank you, thank you, thank you! I came looking for advice. My 7.5 year old is such a worrier, and recently I have been concerned that she might be suffering from depression. She has dreadful insomnia; tearfulness; anxiety. It is a real comfort to see that we're not alone.
I notice that the What to do... series has one about insomnia particularly, so we're going to give that one a go, since I think tiredness is one of her main problems at the moment....
Thank you very much guys. I hope all your LO's anxiety issues are resolved; unfortunately this is all something she's inherited from me, so I know too well how debilitating and unpleasant it can be.

xx

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