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Dear God, someone tell me how to stop DS2 headbutting me before something dreadful happens.....

(12 Posts)
WhatFreshHellIsThis Wed 13-Jul-11 20:02:54

DS2 is two and a bit. Not terribly verbal, although coming on. Tends to express himself physically, fair amount of bopping his older brother on the head etc

His most charming habit though, is if you're holding him and something is not to his taste, is to just lean back and clock you with a great fat Glasgow kiss. So far he's brained me on the forehead, the chin, the cheekbone/eye socket (OUCH!) and today, right on the top lip, resulting in tears (mine), a fat lip (also mine) and some despair (yep, mine too). He is mostly unperturbed.

So far we're saying No very firmly and removing him from the scene, either to his cot or putting him down and walking away. He almost always comes and kisses it better, sometimes says Sorry as well, although words aren't really his thing.

Any tips? Should we be punishing him more actively? He doesn't seem like he's reached the age where he connects cause and effect that much. Any ideas? Anyone had this and can reassure me that he'll grow out of it rather than becoming a junior brawler before he's even in school?

p.s. he NEVER does this at nursery. They call him an Angel. angry

WhatFreshHellIsThis Wed 13-Jul-11 20:23:14

Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?

Lexiejack Wed 13-Jul-11 21:09:18

My DS is 2 and did this. Now he headbutts the floor sad I pick him up and sling him on a bed/cushion/sofa and leave him to get it out of his system now!! They learn eventually!! DS is very verbal but when he gets frustrated he forgets how to verbalise how he's feeling and lashes out

WhatFreshHellIsThis Wed 13-Jul-11 21:15:51

I wouldn't mind the anger if it wasn't my face taking the battering! My teeth hurt from today's onslaught. Is your DS growing out of it at all?

Lexiejack Wed 13-Jul-11 22:26:19

Yup but now he bites sometimes grin usually sofa cushions although some of his nursery friends and his sister have been on the receiving end of it. He gets time outs and chance to cool down and it is getting better

Rillyrillygoodlooking Thu 14-Jul-11 10:24:36

Love the Bueller ref.

DS used to headbutt the floor, the wall, anything in fact, when he was upset. He also was slow to express himself verbally. I used to ignore it, or tell him no, or cuddle him when he caused bruising. He grew out of that.

He does try and headbutt me and DH, but he kind of runs at it, so you know he is coming. We put out our hands so he lands on the palms of our hands.

I get hard headbutts to the stomach a few times.

I am not sure how to stop it, but we say no and try to protect ourselves!

theDudesmummy Thu 14-Jul-11 11:35:50

My DS (2.1) does this too, I have come close to losing my temper when he has suddenly thrown his head back and caught me very painfully on the nose (more than once). He also headbutts the floor or high chair (only when you tell him not to do something, as a protest). He once did it to the wall but that hurt him and he didn't do it again! (He generally very obviously checks it is a soft surface before he starts). I have tried pretty much ignoring it and that seems to help, if he starts on the floor I sometimes leave the room for a minute or two, without an audince he stops. (He is speech delayed, has some hearing loss, and due to have grommets soon, so I supppose he is probably rather frustrated). It is harder to ignore when you are bashed in the face though! I do sympathise!

theDudesmummy Thu 14-Jul-11 11:41:20

PS apart from trying to ignore the floor butting, am afraid don't really have any useful suggestions, but would welcome some!

Ambergambler Thu 14-Jul-11 12:01:29

Hi all, newbie to mumsnet, but so not new to this problem! DS2 has just turned 17months and has been inflicting this on us for a few months. He just flings himself, particularly if you are holding him and he wants to get down. Very, very painful. Have also been telling him no, and he does try to kiss you better if he thinks he hurt you. (If you happen to hurt yourself however, he thinks it hilarious hmm )
With regard to butting floor /wall / cabinets etc, y younger sister used to do this all the time. The thing that stopped her was a tantrum on the beach! She butted the sand and it went all over her face, in her mouth etc and she never did it again. (She really loves to be reminded of now that she is in her twenties too!)

WhatFreshHellIsThis Thu 14-Jul-11 14:05:46

Thank you! Haven't been back because no Threads I'm On is really playing havoc with my MNetting!

Interestingly theDudesMummy, have just taken DS2 to the doctor about his ears and he has glue ear in both ears, so can't hear very well, so maybe this is a common reaction to that sort of frustration?

The doctor said he'd rather watch and wait before resorting to grommets, esp as his speech seems to be improving (DS2's, not the doctor's - his speech is fine!) but he did mention behavioural issues as being another reason to do something about the ear problems, so it sounds like it must be common.

Ah well. Might buy a crash helmet....

WhatFreshHellIsThis Thu 14-Jul-11 14:06:24

AmberGambler - I laughed a lot about the sand story! Am about to go on holiday, shall see if we can engineer it.....

Ambergambler Fri 15-Jul-11 14:51:02

@WhatFreshHellIsThis
lol always worth a try! wink

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