Help! Very difficult baby!(10 Posts)
My son is a very difficult baby, he's 6.5 months old and while he sleeps very well (or so it seems - his fussing always makes me think he still needs more sleep), when awake he is always loudly protesting at whatever he is doing. As soon as I put him down, he will start to make a grunting sound, almost like he is extremely frustrated. I try and lie on the floor with him and play with toys including books, musical toys and building blocks but he will only be interested for 5 minutes max before the grunting/crying starts again. A lot of the time when I pick him up and walk round with him he will stop but sometimes he will continue grunting and protesting until I manage to distract him.
I thought this would ease when he gets mobile but although he can roll over, when he tries crawling but gets instantly upset and frustrated and will give up and cry until he is either picked up or passed whatever it is he was after. He has been a hard baby since he was born and I have taken him to the doctors numerous times convinced there was something wrong but have now come to the conclusion that this is just his temperament.
I have him in a relatively good routine, he sleeps every 2 hours and feeds every 3 hours and is now having solid meals twice a day.
Looking after my little guy is very intense, I am extremely patient and of course love him dearly but whilst I am managing at the moment I am due to go back to work and am getting very concerned about leaving him with the child minder.
Is there anybody else with a difficult baby who could please offer their advice or share their experience, I need some help!
I think 5 minutes of concentrating on one toy is more than normal for a 6 month old. also, the frustration of not being able to mobilise himself as he would like is normal at this age - once he learns to get about by himself, he will be far more content.
In the meantime, babies love to be carried around with an adult as much as possible. Do you use a sling?
Your Childminder will be experienced with babies of all temperaments and will find her/his own methods of calming your ds, so don't worry about that too much.
my ds got very frustrated at this age, wanting to move but not being able to. My ds was also a very difficult baby and a really poor sleeper.
try to go out to baby groups etc as much as possible for your own sanity - and you will see that many babies are the same!
I had post natal depression which i realised at about 7 months. i felt anxious all the time and was always taking him to the doctor thinking there was something wrong - could this be a possibility with you? it wasn't anything like depression , it was more worry. I had counselling which helped immensely
it will get better... DS1 was a real pain as a baby but now that he is approaching 3 he is much more agreeable to be around, less grumpy, less tantrums, more smiles etc... the hardest bit was 2 to 4 months for me and 12 to 20 months
sorry, i dont have any advice, just wanted to tell ou you are not alone, some babies are more difficult... i try to be extra cheerful and smiley when i am with him in the hope that it will rub off him...
nursery wise, DS1 still scream his heart out every morning but then 2 minutes after im gone, he plays happily with other children etc so be ready, it can be heartbreaking
one thing ive learned though is that if there are no tears then it is a tantrum, if there are tears then he is really sad/unhappy. so i adjust my behaviour based on those cues.
ie in the morning at nursery he screams and kind of cry but there are no tears: it is a tantrum. whereas i told him off a bit too much at dinner time today and tears started to roll so i knew i scared him and apologise straight away.
hope this help
Oh I can relate to this. My most common thought for 17 months (until he could walk) was "adoption is an option". You appear to be calm and patient - traits I can not lay claim to myself - so you will cope!
I do believe that it is temperament and, as soon as they are able to potter around and entertain themselves, life gets a whole lot easier. For them and us.
Don't get me wrong he still has massive tantrums and is hard work but is genuinely a pleasure to have around. I love the character of him - temper and all! So on a cheerful note you only have around 12 months to go!!
Oh I feel for you. I have a what seems to be a very easy baby. She's 8 months and seems quite happy most of the time. Yet, I am still exhausted at the end of the day. So, I can just imagine how hard things must be for you.
Do you think that your little one may be uncomfortable in any way? I'm asking as my friend's daughter was quite what she called: 'a difficult baby'. She took her for a check with a cranial osteopath and she now swears that the treatment she got helped. No words of wisdom here, just a thought.
Hope things get better for you soon!
I can also relate to your experience.
My dd was exactly the same (really difficult, loud, frustrations, screamed alot) until recently things got soooo much easier. She's 8 months and she can now roll over, sit and crawl and pull herself up and basically entertain herself. She can follow me around the flat as well.
Just recently I feel I'm enjoying being a mum, even though some days are still challenging, but I also feel I understand my own baby's needs better than before.
I'm still exhausted at the end of the day but nothing compared to how I was feeling a few months ago - I really felt I wasn't coping at all and needed help.
As others said hopefully once they get mobile things will improve, mine did!
Have you considered refux for his fussiness.my DS had it and the symptoms are obvious, my DS had no probs feeding at all but suffered after and grew out of it. You can get medication from GP , like gaviscon for babies .
Are not obvious that should say.I phones are soo annoying.
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