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What time does your 7YO go to bed/sleep??

(17 Posts)
angelPeacock Mon 04-Jul-11 10:05:43

Hi, im having an issue with my 7YO DS atm, he goes up to bed by 8pm (sometimes before but always told lights out by 8). but he isnt going to sleep.
Last night it was 12.30 and he was only just dozing off.
He will get back up and turn his light on and read or turn his radio on, or his dvd player, each time we turn them off again.
We have tried taking them away. Sitting with him for hours. Talking nicely, shouting, allowing him more time, sending him to bed without supper.....everything!!!!!!!!
im at a loss as to what to try next. so, what time is "normal" for a 7YO to be going to bed and or going to sleep.
My DD 4, goes up at 7 and sleeps!! (quite the opposite to what she was like as a baby! hahaha)
he hasnt always been like this, as a baby/toddler he was great for going to bed and sleeping, but from the age of about 3 its steadily got worse.
They are in seperate rooms now (since april) but doesnt seem to have changed anything.
HELP please confused sad

GooseyLoosey Mon 04-Jul-11 10:13:20

dd goes to bed at 8.00 but can read or draw for 30 mins if she wants to. The time is quite good for her to unwind. If she is tired she doesn't bother.

She did go through a phase of getting up in the middle of the night over and over again. I have to get up at 5.00am for work so this was not a welcome development. I have found with both my children that you have to work out what their "currency" is for effective discipline - the sanctions that work for ds do not work for dd because she simply does not care about the same things. The thing that dd loves the most is the routine things that she does with me - so I always say goodbye before I leave in the morning (at her request). I explained that if I had not had enough sleep, I would be too tired to say goodbye and would just have to run out of the house. She was very upset about this and the getting up stopped.

Both children know that if they cannot sleep, they can read. They can not get up and listen to music and if they did that, there would be no radios in their rooms!

balloonbump Mon 04-Jul-11 10:16:37

DS has always been like this, he would lie in bed awake until 1 or 2am sometimes. We removed all electrical appliances from his room (and I'd suggest trying that) - but DS would still manage to find something, a toy car or just gazing out the window.

Anyway, DS was diagnosed with high functioning autism later and it turns out he needed melatonin. Some children just don't produce it in their own bodies and it's very common in those on the spectrum. I don't know if it's used with children who aren't on the spectrum, but it's worth asking about - you can get it from the States without prescription.

angelPeacock Mon 04-Jul-11 12:06:51

thanks for the repies, we are in the process of trying to DX asd but i didnt want that to influence the replies iygwim. I wanted an idea of NS children and whats "normal" for the age. I had worried that it was part of the ASD and i dont know how i feel about the melatonin as i havnt researched it or talked about it at all. Having said that im not against it in cases where its needed....
We have a pead app on thursday so i think the sleep diary will be talked about then (havnt mentioned it before).

Thanks again for the replies, and if anyone else wants to coment on NS children and the sleep times, it would be welcome

Rubyx Mon 04-Jul-11 12:40:13

Is he generally active, doing well at school, coherent and chirpy. If so don't worry too much. If it is affecting his progress then continue doing all the bits you are doing. Does he get much activity after school? Maybe try getting him to take a long bike ride around the park or something like that.

LawrieMarlow Mon 04-Jul-11 12:45:51

DS is 7 and starts going to bed around 8pm. I read to him and leave him to it. He says he is normally awake at 9 but he's quiet and so it doesn't bother me. He generally needs waking at around 7:30 in the morning but is quite cheerful.

angelPeacock Mon 04-Jul-11 17:07:55

Rubyx I have been doing a sleep diary to show just those types of things, E.G. yesterday we walked round the local scarecrow festival (a good 2 hours), then the kids helped to make tea and played out, then he had his swimming lesson, certainly not a lazy day smile and he still didnt sleep till 12.30am.

we have tried taking away the electronics and even that doesnt work, he just gets up and comes downstairs or messes about in the bathroom etc.

Lawrie, I dont mind that hes up and he usually does keep himself quiet in his room, but its the fact that its so late hmm that bothers me.

I think now that its not uncommon for kids his age to be up till say 9/10 and still be functioning, but i will still mention it to the pead on thursday.

thanks everyone xx

Chundle Mon 04-Jul-11 19:25:48

Ok my dd has ADHD and awakens around 5.30am no matter what time we put her to bed as a result we need adult time so she goes to her room at 7pm and reads and listens to music to wind down until 8pm then it's lights out - but I'm fairly sure she's still awake around 9pm!

angelPeacock Tue 05-Jul-11 12:04:31

once hes asleep he does sleep through, its just getting him to sleep in the first place hahaha xx
i cant imagine having to wake at 5.30 every morning, its bad enough that hubby wakes me at 4.30 to go to work, but at least i can go back to sleep hahaha.
how do you function chundle? xxx smile

munstersmum Tue 05-Jul-11 12:11:34

DS 7 next month goes to bed at 7.30 but can often be heard talking/singing to self 30 mins later. No electronics in his room. He sleeps through & tends to get up with DP just after 6am. I rise a little later grin

gramercy Tue 05-Jul-11 12:42:42

My dd can be carousing round till 11pm. Her friends apparently bed down at 7pm.

It's exasperating as often we're asleep and get woken up by dd trotting off to the loo, or rustling a book etc.

She never seems to be tired the next day; I guess some children/people need less sleep than others.

Dd's cousin has always been a Margaret Thatcher 4-hours a night person - it drove her parents mad but now she is applying to Cambridge so lack of sleep hasn't really been a problem for her!

ProfYaffle Tue 05-Jul-11 12:53:04

dd1 goes to bed at 8pm ish, reads for half an hour or so before sleep, is up at 6am. I always thought she needed an unusually small amount of sleep but maybe that's not the case.

I was going to suggest exercise too but I see you've covered that.

angelPeacock Tue 05-Jul-11 20:28:15

thanks, will see what the pead says on thursday. I know all kids are different, SN or not, but when its affecting 'us' i think it needs to be addressed somehow confused
i realy dont see the difference if we take the electronics out or not, and trust we have tried that several times. sad
again thanks for the replies xxx

InLimboAgain Tue 05-Jul-11 20:51:06

Good to read my dd's not the only one!! She too reads to herself for what seems like ages after bedtime. However, her windows have no blinds so she's been going to bed in blaring sunshine some evenings, we're moving in a couple of weeks and I can't wait for her to have proper curtains and a proper calm darkened bedtime routine! grin

Something like this worth a try?? It takes you on an imaginary journey with calming music, it works for me if not for dd! grin She loves it when she's had a bad dream or comes to me in the middle of the night whining that she can't sleep though.

post Tue 05-Jul-11 21:01:50

Second the melatonin suggestion if there's a possibility hes on the spectrum. Ds2 didn't sleep through the night once in his life until we discovered it when he was 11, and it's not only been life changing for us but more importantly he talks about how awful it was for him when he used to not sleep and ho much he loves sleeping and dreaming now. And I used to get cross with him for not going to sleep (sad). I've hears that if lack of melatonin isn't the reason for insomnia, it just won't work, it's not like sleepingvtablets or anything. But def worth investigating, talking to your gp/ paediatrician first.

Chundle Tue 05-Jul-11 21:44:56

Angel I barely function! Dd2 is even worse and wakes 5-12 times a night! For my birthday this year I'm booking myself into a hotel just so I get a lie in the next day smile

angelPeacock Tue 05-Jul-11 23:34:20

inlimbo, thanks for the sugestion, but DS does struggle with imagination so not too sure it would work but great idea for the future maybee smile

post, thanks for the positive info about melatonin, i will see what the pead says xx smile

chindle, how olds DD2? you do sound like superwoman for being able to function at all, i hope you do get your full nights sleep for your birthday smile xx

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