i am going out of my mind!!!(6 Posts)
DD has just turned 19 months and is driving me mad. She has always been a good sleeper, doing minimum 12 hours at night and 2-3 in the day.
However, for 5 weeks now she has been terrible. She refuses naps and bedtime. She either screams like she's being killed and runs out of her room, or she throws herself out of bed, or she throws her teddy (which she can't live without!) out of bed to get me to come in. She often runs in and out of her room to try and get into my bed to sleep.
She was teething for the first 2 weeks but doesn't seem to be teething now. If I think she is, I always give her pain meds before bed.
It takes anywhere from 15-45 mins to get her to have her nap (which means less nap time overall) and anything from 15 mins - 2 hours to get her to bed.
Hubby is unsupportive and tells me to leave her to it, because we both know that within 5 mins she'll give in and stop crying. BUT only because a) she's snuck into our bed or b) she's asleep on the landing or in her doorway. We tried a gate on her door but she just sleeps in the doorway, and if she hears us come upstairs she wakes and it starts all over again. We tried letting her cry it out, but she ends up asleep on the landing behind the gate, and it starts all over again if she hears us make any noise. So now we dont have a gate on her door as there's no point.
Atm I am going out of my mind. I've been doing the supernanny approach where u just put them back in bed with no eye contact etc. It works, but takes minimum 15-20 mins. Most nights its more.
I am so tired, she doesn't wake in the night which is good, but because she is overtired, she has bags under her eyes and spends all day being grumpy, having tantrums and shouting at me lol. It's driving me mad.
Also - once she finally does settle, I have to stay upstairs in my bedroom silently for 15 mins or so, because if she hears me click the gate shut and go downstairs, it starts all over again.
I get no time to myself and I've tried everything - cutting her naps shorter, stopping naps, longer naps, nothing works. Ive moved bedtime from 6.20pm to 6.45, (aiming for 7pm asleep) no difference.
Oh poor you! this sounds dreadful. I had a similar experience with my daughter when she was three and half and found out after very gentle questioning that she had got frightened by nightmares that she suffered when she had a few stitches in her arm where she fell and cut it a few months earlier. Although the pain had gone, she still associated bed with the nightmares which had been caused by this traumatic event. I addressed the nightmares with her and the bedtime trantrums stopped. It could be that your little one is still associating bed time with painful episodes when she was teething a while back. I'm sure it will pass, so be patient with her and 'keep on, keeping on' as they say....
You sound exhausted - I really feel for you. Just as we think we've got things right - it all changes!
The only thing I can think of is to whether anything had changed to set it off (other than the teething) - milk, something new in her room, creche/nursery, anything new at home? My little one is 16 months, and she reacts to any change, no matter how little. Even a different cuddly toy on her chest of drawers (which she can see from her cot) made bedtimes tricky for a bit. I guess tho even if you can find the cause, shes got into a habit now of 'playing up'. I think the only thing you can do is persevere with the super nanny approach, but its something hubby (or someone else) needs to help you with to make it bearable. Good luck, and as clearaschrystal said, it will pass - it is only a phase. Try and get some 'time out' for you if you can so you can deal with it a bit better.
I have heard that some toddlers go through a rough patch with sleeping at about 18 months, and that in most cases it resolves itself after a couple of months. Google 18 month sleep regression.
Hopefully that's what it is and you will just have to ride it out for a little longer. Sounds awful though.
I've heard the same as fruitsalad and think the book "the wonder weeks" has info re this (or the mner angeldog who knows a lot about these things)
thanks for the replies
there's no changes or anything new. She's at home with me all day (no nursery) and always has been, can't think of anything that's changed at all.
For the last 3 nights she hasn't settled until 8.15pm, regardless of how long or what time her nap was...
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