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7 month old doesn't have stranger anxiety

(11 Posts)
lurcherlover Wed 15-Jun-11 23:39:01

Is this normal? He is quite happy to be passed around to people who he's never met before and is smiley with everyone. He also doesn't seem particularly ecstatic to see me when I'm away from him - if I leave him with my mum for a few hours, when I come to get him I get a smile, but that's it - and he'd smile for anyone! I don't have a real feeling that he's missed me...I'm worried he should show a bit more of an attachment to me by now?? He also doesn't put his arms up to be picked up, should he be doing this yet?

Deliaskis Thu 16-Jun-11 08:20:52

My DD is much younger than yours (4 months), so I don't know the exact answer, but I do remember reading somewhere that at this age and for many babies, up until late in the second half of the first year, they don't really notice/care (!) that much who is providing their care, as long as their needs are being met. That sounds awful, I don't mean they don't know who Mum or Dad is, but more that when they're not there, they're not thinking about them. They will then hear or see you and know who you are, but won't yet be able to think 'Where's Mummy, I don't know these people I'm with now', or 'I'm glad Mummy's back because she was out of the room for a long time and I couldn't see her'.

From what I remember reading, separation anxiety late in the first year (I think) is really when they start to realise that 'the Mummy person' goes away sometimes, and it takes time for them to then learn that she comes back.

I know my DD is only 4 months but she absolutely couldn't care less who is looking after her a the mo, it makes it all a bit thankless in some ways, I want her to neeeeeeeeeed meeeeeeeeeee.


matana Thu 16-Jun-11 08:47:03

My DS is nearly 8 months and exactly the same. I have a theory that it actually shows they are very attached, so it bothers them less being away from you because they're confident you'll return. Some babies are naturally more content than others - i really wouldn't worry. At least you get a smile! All i get is a cursory glance, before he returns to what he was previously doing with someone infinitely more interesting than me! But i see the smiles he gives me at other times and how happy he is generally so i'm not worried.

By the way, it may be a little too early for separation anxiety which often doesn't start until closer to 8 months, but peaks even later than that.

I'm quite pleased to have escaped so far. It would break my heart to see my DS in floods of tears because he's missing me. I'd much rather he has a good time in the company of others!

RitaMorgan Thu 16-Jun-11 08:51:55

Mine is like this too, he's 10 months! Happy to go to anyone, happy to go to nursery and not that bothered about saying goodbye grin He had a very brief period of mild separation anxiety at about 9 months and that's been it so far - of course it might hit harder later.

I think separation anxiety tends to hit between 9-18 months - 7 months is maybe a bit early. And some babies experience it more strongly than others. All babies have different personalities.

MollysChamber Thu 16-Jun-11 09:00:20

Completely normal.

monkoray Thu 16-Jun-11 09:01:58

Yep mine didn't develop any stranger anxiety until he was about 14 months. Then your really friendly baby suddenly becomes shy, most odd.

Momo36 Thu 16-Jun-11 09:09:27

My 7 month old has just started to realise that there are strangers and that changed from one week to another. As if a swich went on. She cries a little when passed around and follows me with her eyes wanting to be handed back. So the exact opposite. However, this has just kicked in. I'm sure that it will happen with your little one as well so I would not worry. Enjoy free hands and the ability for others to hold your baby!

SarkyLady Thu 16-Jun-11 09:14:59


It is why it us often easier to go back to work after 6 month (ish) rather that at a year when they are usually a lot more clingy.

exoticfruits Thu 16-Jun-11 09:19:01

They are all different-don't worry about it.

SpotsMumSally Thu 16-Jun-11 09:58:26

My DS is nearly four, he's always been like this and still is.

notnowbernard Thu 16-Jun-11 10:00:55

I have 3 and none of them have ever shown stranger anxiety as babies

None of them ever unhappy to be left by me (as babies, anyway)

They have all been smiley, laid-back babies (wish I coulld say the same about their pre-school yearswink)

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