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Behaviour/development

15 month old biting and grabbing

3 replies

sprinkles77 · 13/06/2011 13:19

DS is otherwise a lovely person, sleeps brilliantly and is thoroughly charming. However he bites and often grabs at my face. He has scratched me many many times. He does this with a smile on his face, and I think he sees it as a game, rather than being aggressive. He does it only to people he knows very well, so me, DH and my mother. Up till now I've avoided reacting, feeling any reaction at all would encourage him. I've just taken evasive action. Occasionally I have told him to "stop it", and today he bit me and drew blood. I smacked him immediately. I actually don't have a problem with the odd smack, but still feel a bit bad about it, he is just a baby! The irritating thing is, that he can do as he's told on other occasions (he shuts doors and hands me things when asked). The biting is manageable, but the grabbing at my face makes it hard to carry him, and he can't walk yet! Any suggestions on how to stop this?

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monkoray · 13/06/2011 13:46

I'm afraid its very normal at that age. My ds went through it. I think the biting is a show of affection. They are exploring you - a bit like a blind person would.
We just said ' no biting' and moved him away from us if he bit. The grabbing while carrying is trickier because you often aren't in a position to just put them down and say no grabbing. But you should at least consistently say no grabbing and try and move his hands away even if you can't put him down immediately.
Also make sure you explain every time biting and grabbing hurts.
I'd caution against using a smack because when he starts his hitting phase - and he will- it will be hard you reinforce no hitting if thats the method you have used to stop the biting and grabbing

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Mummyloveskisses · 13/06/2011 14:19

I agree with monkoray I have a DS2 (15 months) and the pulling, biting, grabbing is all part of him exploring me.... none done with aggression.... and TBH even if it was in a tantrum he is only a baby a firm no and moving him away would be enough for him to 'eventually' understand it wasn't acceptable. I think you lost it today and because it was harder than usual you struck out IMO.
I don't agree with smacking ever and think it is appauling behaviour for an adult to strike a baby. All your teaching your child is smacking is ok

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RalphGnu · 16/06/2011 18:55

I came on this thread with the same problem, my 18 month old kicks, bites, smacks and even headbutts me when he's cross or sometimes just for fun. He knows I find it unpleasant because he waits to see my reaction. He's normally very loving but the constant assault for want of a better word is really getting me down. Will he grow out of it? I do the firm 'no' and move him away from me, but then he starts hitting himself! I'm presuming it's frustration as he's not yet articulate enough to express his wants and needs but my word, it's a pain (pardon the pun).

Please let me know if you find anything that works, sprinkles.

Re the smacking, I think at the age your DS is he won't make the connection between him smacking you and you smacking him back. But otherwise, your child, your rules IMO. I don't think it's appalling for a parent to smack their child, but that's a whole other point which this thread isn't about.

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