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Balance when encouraging/supporting talents/skills

(9 Posts)
KatyMac Mon 06-Jun-11 22:30:51

DD dances

I walk a fairly tight path between encouraging/supporting & being realistic

Yesterday I was slated by another mum for allowing DD to do so much dancing & have so many classes

In a conversation a few minutes later with a different mum I was again slated for not supporting her more and failing to make the most of her talent & provide her with better opportunities

Both are probably a realistic view of our 'family' but it demonstrated that path I tread is precarious and open to interpretation

How do people balance it?

KatyMac Mon 06-Jun-11 23:06:39


EBDteacher Tue 07-Jun-11 06:24:10

I used to do a competitive sport as a child (think ice-skating, it wasn't but similar pressures). I know my mum was sometimes looked on as pushy just for providing me with the opportunities to do what I needed and wanted to do- for example taking me to train before school and letting me have days off school to go to competitions.

I have never, ever regreted that I only did that one sport and wasn't an 'all-rounder'. Tbh, when the time came I also think it got me into Oxford because they were as interested in my sporting achievements as they were my A Level grades.

I wouldn't limit your daughter's chance to achieve what she wants to because of other people's opinions- just make sure the impetus to dance is coming from her and let her do it at the level she wants to.

Is it ballet? You could just get her into the Royal Ballet School and let them tell her how many classes she needs to do?? wink

MoonFaceMamaaaaargh Tue 07-Jun-11 06:40:51

If you know you are doing the right thing by your daughter ignore what randoms have to say. I doubt their parenting would hold up to public scrutiny.

I'm not saying ignoring is easy, just wanting to remind you that what they think doesn't matter. smile

KatyMac Tue 07-Jun-11 11:48:28

EBDteacher that's the level DD wants to be at, practising all time but I am less sure; not ballet - ballroom so the career paths are not defined.

I know I have to ignore I just wondered how others balance it

KatyMac Tue 07-Jun-11 16:37:57

Trouble from DD now; she is poorly & must go to school tomorrow apparently - so she can go dancing after sad

UniS Wed 08-Jun-11 19:00:48

not sure yet, still figuring it out. CURRENTLY I take the view that DS can do more of his chosen sport in holidays but on school nights I limit it and don't let him do anything that will result in a very late bedtime. BUT DS is rather younger than your DD.

KatyMac Wed 08-Jun-11 19:42:33

I guess, DD goes t 8:30 on non-going out nights but much later at weekends

There isn't much available in the hols but that is a good idea

KatyMac Wed 08-Jun-11 20:48:11

It looks like we are doing the worng things for her future

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