Hats off to Moonfacemamaaaaaaaaagh et. al who are being very gentle and not at all arsey and biased in their recommendations. It's very late, and I can't be bothered to be so careful...
Seconding (thirding/ fourthing) 'Why Love Matters'; please read before anything else. Stick with its rather dry style; it contextualises other recommendations: Attachment Parenting (Dr Sears) and Unconditional Parenting (Alfie Kohn)
I also have and enjoy The Wonder Weeks (for preparedness for unsettling moments) and Playful Parenting, though my baby is a bit young to really have tested this one properly. I also liked 3 in a Bed; we are thus.
Have got the Baby Whisperer ones, but don't really like them, they interfered with me just looking at the baby and working out what was wrong with him plus made me worry that soothing him would interfere with his ability to become independent. (My baby is 23 weeks.) As per her instructions in the first 6 weeks I did not let the baby feed-to-sleep, or suckle to sooth rather than feed and my DS went from 75th to 12th centile. (Centiles - a form of tyranny unleashed against new mums by midwives and health visitors) Having chucked them, baby and I are happier, I often don't know in hours/ minutes how long it is since he fed for x mins before his x min nap AND he just made it back onto the 75th centile.
Have got the Gina Ford ones, found them way too proscriptive (8.15: you must eat toast and drink tea) plus can't bring myself to trust someone who pushes controlled crying (I know it 'works' insofar as it teaches the baby to not bother crying in certain situations, I just don't buy the idea that this is a good thing).
Right, off to buy Penelope Leach. Must just repeat - Why Love Matters