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Worried dad- 3 week old baby, no weight gain.

(87 Posts)
AdamR Mon 24-Jan-11 11:40:46

Hello Everyone.
As a first post on here im sorry it has to be a 'help' but im hoping to be able to contribute more once we have her gaining weight.

Well, Chloe is now 3 weeks old.
when she was born she was 6lb 15oz, during the first week she lost 5oz which isnt all that bad especially since she had a tounge tie.

At 1 week old she had her tounge tie cut and between week 1 and 2 she put on her 5oz again (exclusivley on breast).

now at 3 weeks old she is still only 6lb 15oz.
she has around 3-5 really dirty nappies and same in wet ones.
She also feeds every 3-4 hours for about 40 minutes or so with a short gap for winding in the middle (again just on breast).
she also suffers from quite bad wind which is quite upseting for us at times.

Am i being ovely worried as she is my first baby. i thought she would have put on a few oz by now.
she seems a happy and content baby apart from the wind..

thanks for your help in advance.


freshmint Mon 24-Jan-11 11:43:06

Well she HAS put on weight - 5oz so that is great. If she is pooing and wetting nicely then she is clearly eating well. But possibly not enough.. at this stage they often need feeding more than once every 3 -4 hours. Could mum offer her food more often - every couple of hours or less? That might increase her milk, and therefore how much she eats, and help with weight gain.

DOes she fuss in between feeds?

AdamR Mon 24-Jan-11 12:30:57

mum unfortunately cant feed that often as her breasts / nipples are sore.
Im trying to find some BF support for her as somethings not quite right as i dont think she should be hurting.

chloe does sometimes fuss between feeds if she is woken, but generally feeds when she wakes up which is about every 3-4 hours.

pookamoo Mon 24-Jan-11 12:39:41

Hi Adam,
Congratulations on baby Chloe and becoming a dad! You are already doing a great job being so supportive to your partner and Chloe!

Don't worry about asking for help, mumsnetters love giving help!

Definitely go for some breastfeeding help. If you call the nct helpline on 0300 330 0771 (you don't have to be a member, it's free) they will be able to put you in touch with a local counsellor who may well be able to come out and see you. The line is open from 8am til 10pm, I think.

Also, there might be a group nearby that you can all go to. I say "all go to" because in the early days with my daughter we were really struggling with breastfeeding and my husband took us along to our local support group (who were really happy to have a dad there) and gave us all some great advice which helped me to feed my daughter for as long as we both wanted.

Sadly, some mums do find it difficult, but you are doing the right thing asking for help!

oh and re. the painful wind, we used infacol, and baby massage helped. As did the "tiger in the tree" carry which looks like this (not my photo, I just googled) it REALLY helped us!

Do let us know how you get on! smile

AdamR Mon 24-Jan-11 13:02:51

Thanks for the responces so far everyone

We have been using infacol for a few days and not sure if its really worked yet.

I will give the NCT a call (had not thought of them).
I think one of Chloe's problems is the fact she eats too quickly and gives herself hiccups and wind this way (shes always been a very hiccupy baby in the womb).

and will try the tiger in a tree this afternoon

pookamoo Mon 24-Jan-11 13:04:19

Do try the nct they are really helpful.

Tiger in the tree is a lovely cuddle anyway, and you can do it one handed and make yourself a cup of tea / answer the door once you are an expert!

GeekLove Mon 24-Jan-11 13:11:26

If this is any consolation my son didn't get his birth weight back until he was 4wks old and had lost 10% by 2 weeks. He had jaundice which does tend to blunt weight gain.
However, he was doing all the things expected of a healthy baby of that age, and was feeding and sleeping well with plenty of wet and dirty nappies, so with that in mind I didn't worry.

If you can call the NCT try and arrange for a BF councillor to come round - they could observe a feed and see what the problem could be - it could be something like poor positioning for example.

good luck and enjoy your baby!

Guacamole Mon 24-Jan-11 13:14:51

I think she's doing okay, however with regards to the breastfeeding, seek some help. I'm afraid it is painful at first IME especially if the latch isn't good. With me it took a good 5 weeks before my nipples stopped being so tender and Lansinoh was a Godsend as well as these things called breast shells (keeps bra and clothing away from the nipple). At around 9 weeks something just clicked for me and DS, and breastfeeding became very easy!
With regard to wind DS suffered badly until about 16 weeks, Infacol didn't work for us, he seemed to jut grow out of it.
Congratulations on the birth of your daughter!

MoonUnitAlpha Mon 24-Jan-11 13:16:03

Definitely agree about calling the NCT or La Leche League to get a bf counsellor to see you.

As others have said, 3-4 hourly isn't often enough for a newborn. You should be aiming for 8-12 feeds in 24 hours. Also make sure you're offering both sides at every feed, and even swapping back to the first side again to get as much milk into the baby as possible.

swanriver Mon 24-Jan-11 13:30:26

Best thing is to suggest your wife goes to bed with the baby for a BabyMoon for at least four days, and feeds during the day every two hours, and at night when baby wakes(not more than 3-4 hours). Just make feeding your priority during the next few weeks, let your wife just relax, have lots of skin to skin, respond to baby etc, bring her meals cups of tea etc...It worked for me (even when my husband went back to work) Your help will be invaluable to help her feed, even when positioning is perfect.

AdamR Mon 24-Jan-11 18:10:43

Well, Thanks again for all the input
I phoned up NCT and we where advised to get baby to have more skin to skin with mum.

Only problem is mum just cant comfy with baby laying on her.

Im hoping to take her to a BF class on wednesday eve, so lets hope for the best.

Still dont understand why she has not put on any weight this past week, but the week before she put on nearly 5oz

BlueberryPancake Mon 24-Jan-11 18:18:37

I'm no expert but what position is your wife in when BF? Does she have very big breasts - that can be a problem as it's hard to get comfortable. A Breasfeeding or V shaped pillow can help. rm=v+shaped+pillow

Has she tried feeding lying down? It did the trick for me as DS was very very fidgety.

It would be best to get a expert to visit you if that's possible.

mathanxiety Mon 24-Jan-11 21:01:09

She needs to get her latch sorted out. Sore nipples can be helped by air drying them.

I recommend she catch her boob with her hand shaped like a letter C, and squeeze the boob flat, then poke as much of the nipple as possible into the baby's mouth - it should go in quite far, with only a bit of areola showing. The soreness comes from the sandpapering the nipples get from the baby's tongue if the nipple isn't in far enough.

Try different positions and holds, air drying (close your curtains if you're overlooked...)

The baby needs to feed more frequently than every 3-4 hours so fixing the soreness is important.

thisisyesterday Mon 24-Jan-11 21:16:22

hiya Adam,

i don't know if any of the people you have spoken to (NCT etc) have mentioned this, but it is recommended, in the red book no less, that a healthy, term baby does not need to be weighed more frequently than once a month

and this is part of the reason why!

that isn't to say that everything is fine, because obviously I am not qualified to say that, and there could be any number of issues that are affecting her being able to transfer milk effectively

from what you have said I would say that
1) you need to see a qualified breastfeeding counsellor face to face.
2) sore nipples are generally a sign that all is not well with latch or positioning. Either/both of these could mean that baby is not transferring milk effectively, which could affect her weight gain
3) the way to get her to gain more is to fee dher more. It's relatively unusual for a baby this young to be going 3-4 hours between feeds, and if you're looking to up milk supply/increase weight gain then you would want to be feeding at least every 2 hours- waking her if necessary

where in the country are you? perhaps one of us could put you in touch with a good breastfeeding counsellor?

pookamoo Mon 24-Jan-11 21:29:04

Hi Adam,
Maybe mum could take a bath with Chloe? If you run her a nice warm bath (not too hot, and no bubbles) and she can get in and relax for a little while while you give the baby a cuddle and get her undressed. Then when she's ready you can pass the baby over, and she can lie between her mum's breasts (obviously with her head out of the water).

This helps the baby to make the reflexive, instinctive actions she makes when she's seeking out the breast. It's good for stimulating milk production, and can be an easier way for mum to be comfy whilst undressed.

You'd need to be on standby with a nice fluffy towel for Chloe though, when they are done!

If nothing else, mum will probably appreciate 5 minutes in a relaxing bath! smile

Oh yes, whereabouts (roughly) in the country are you, in case one of us can recommend a counsellor?

Sossiges Mon 24-Jan-11 21:36:06

Try has great BF advice & best of all, videos which really helped me to sort out problems with latch in early days. Lansinoh for sore nipples. Congrats & all the best smile

allyfe Mon 24-Jan-11 22:16:14

With my first I found it so hard to feed comfortably. I was anxious and so my body was tense which made it all so much harder. My saviour was a breast feeding cushion called my breast friend. It put the baby in the right position which made it much easier. Because my daughters latch needed help, it was not till about 4 months we were able to feed in bed, for example.

BUt also to say, weight gain can be really slow in breast fed babies, so keep telling your wife how well she Is doing (I'm sure you are). Also, if she fancies trying the class then great. But if she doesn't then the Oct should have a breast feeding expert who can come to the house. If your wife is feeling emotional about it all, like I was, that might be better than a group at this stage. That way she can cry if she needs to. ALso, tell the health visitors you need breast feeding help and they should also be able to send someone to visit. AND keep asking for help until your wife feels confident, happy and is not in pain when she feeds. Everyone will have slightly different ideas so tell her to get as many as she can and to cry to as many people as she needs to. I certainly did and it worked for us.

One other thing, I am a strong advocate of breast feeding because we managed to make it work and I loved it. You sound like you are doing amazingly supporting your wife, but if she chooses to give up, then she will probably feel terrible guilt and will need as much but different support. YOU probably know that but I just wanted km mention it.

Let us know how it all goes.

allyfe Mon 24-Jan-11 22:19:25

Sorry - the nct not Oct !

allyfe Mon 24-Jan-11 22:23:01

Last extra bit - but just to say my breast friend worked wonders for me and another slimish friend but not for a friend of mine who is a lot larger. For her, a v shaped cushion worked better.

allyfe Mon 24-Jan-11 22:24:29

Last extra bit - but just to say my breast friend worked wonders for me and another slimish friend but not for a friend of mine who is a lot larger. For her, a v shaped cushion worked better.

AdamR Tue 25-Jan-11 21:58:36

Hello Everyone.

Been a busy day so far!
First off, thank you all for your time in responding to this thread and giving advice and support.

Unfortunately GF breasts are now sore and cracked . I have done the 'good' thing and purchased some nipple shells from amazon (2 with holes and 2 without) to try and help her a little.

she is also using the Lansinoh cream but its not working that well at the moment.

I live in Gosport which is on the South coast, Unfortunately the BF supporter here is IMHO useless.
We are in our early 20's and she talks to us like we are 15, also refering to breasts as Quote "Boody Woobies", she also has no children which does not inspire us all that much as to be honest..

NCT where ok but they where not that usefull unfortunately and they said our local contact doesnt normally visit people and only answers phone calls... but will give her a try at some point tomorrow.

Baby is now wanting to feed more often around every 90 minutes to 2 hrs, but due to this we are unfortunately having to dig in to the frozen Breast milk we had as 'back up' and are running out as the GF just cant get enough milk out now her breasts are sore.

we really dont want to give her formula but its getting harder and harder by the day now.

sounds sad but im hoping for some sort of saving grace!

MoonUnitAlpha Tue 25-Jan-11 22:01:10

Maybe try La Leche League as well to see if they have someone local who can see you?

The sore cracked nipples are definitely because of poor latch, she really needs someone to see her in real life as soon as possible. Sorry to hear you've had such crap support so far

Shallishanti Tue 25-Jan-11 22:17:04

you could try these people l
as far as I know, their peer supporters have all bf their own babies
shame about the supporter you came across, that would put me off too.
I'd second what others have said if your GF's nipples are that sore it suggests a problem with positioning/latching on, and really someone needs to watch them to assess that. You are probably not seeing a midwife any more, but your local maternity service should have a lactation adviser you may be able to speak to. Some health visitors can be good at supporting BF, unfortunately some are not.

AdamR Tue 25-Jan-11 22:37:32

Well Unfortunately i spoke too soon about the formula.....

Chloe has managed to eat through over 8oz of our frozen breast milk this afternoon as well as being on mums breasts for 20 minutes each time.

And as an update as im writing this Chloe has just been fed (20 minutes on 1 breast), then had 2oz of the last frozen breast milk.... She is still rooting and wanting food.
unfortunately we have nothing else to give her, and have had to give her formula just to satisfy her appetite

the GF really does want to BF but her breasts just havent had enough time to produce more milk.

allyfe Tue 25-Jan-11 22:38:58

I agree with the others, try every source/person possible. Your breast feeding woman sounds awful - do try midwives. Tell them and the nct and la leche league you urgently need help. Is your oh managing to express during the feeds you are doing expressed breast milk? It really is worth it to keep her supply up.

I really hope you find someone who will come and help.

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