I have 2ds one is 5 and other 2 years 8 months. When DS2 was 9 months I became very ill and he was looked after for 3 months by loving au pair and dad, at same time he had major feeding and sleeping problems due to Adenoids blocking his nose. This took a while to sort out during which he found it very hard to breathe and sleep at night.
Since then he is very attached to his dad, and if in room he will only go to him. It is also causing him to wake nearly every hour to check dad is around. Have tried controlled crying, but just makes daytimes worse. Now hardly going out at night as can't leave him with anyone, plus very wearing on mum as only wants his dad. Anyone experienced this and has advice, on getting him to stop being so worried.
I have to tell you that many toddlers do this without the seperation which you expreienced. I'm not minimizing your ilness...must have been AWFUL. But my own DD is 2.9 and she isvery similar.
She wakes in the night and checks up on me...she's had a stable life so far. Many kids prefer one parent over the other for a while.
Perhaps you're being worried because you feel guilt? Or frutration? I would say that at this young age it is very unlikely that it is due to yourbeing away. But that it's normal and ou and DHs anxiety is causing some stress which he could pick up on?
my 2,5 yr old dd does the same,i have been a sahm,always. shes had barely 2 days without me.she still prefers daddy,and only wants him when she wakes (often) in the night.not to belittle what you have been through,just to let you know youre not alone with this,and that it may not have a thing to do with your time of seperation.
My soon to be 3 yr old DD was very focused on daddy for a very long time. She would ask for him all day, cry in the night for him, only go to him for cuddles, now she splits between us about 50/50. They focus on one parent sometimes, then the other, then both. It will pass.
Lol I'm not Nariv! I wish I had the energy to take control of it but I haven't. I work from home so am very tired a lot of the time.
I have been letting her sleep with us! My elder DD did this too and she got herself out of it by the time she got to three and a half.....not the best advice I know. But hopefully you now know it's not because of your illness.