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Lola? Help with potential family feud!

(39 Posts)
CarryOnDancing Fri 06-Nov-09 13:30:00

Difficult one. At the beginning of the pregnancy we had a shortlist of Matilda and Lola, I liked both but DP prefered Lola. To avoid calling bump she/it/baby we began to call her Lola, this then spread to use by DP's parents. We now have embroidered towels with Lola on and still 10 weeks to go...and I'm having doubts.
Not sure if I'm just bored of having a decision or whether I really would prefer a more traditional name through fear Lola may become dated?

MY new shortlist is Rowan, Matilda and Eliza.
DP is currently refusing to reconsider as he now sees her as Lola. I understand this and guess I may just be being hormonal?

Opinions greatly appreciated!

Pinkjenny Fri 06-Nov-09 13:31:48

I love Eliza. Lola is a little 'wannabe' for my taste, and reminds me of Barry Manilow. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing. smile

randomimposter Fri 06-Nov-09 13:35:36

ouch... tricky one. This is why I never told anyone my thoughts on DS1 before he was born...

FWIW I think Matilda is more flexible - Mattie/Tilly as NN.
Lola IS pretty, but I can't help thinking of Barry Manilow - sorry. (I also always think of the nurse/actress/Prime Minister game - could we have a PM Lola?)

LOVE Eliza - on my list. Great NN, Betsy, Lizzy.

Have never considered Rowan - thought it was a boy's name... Atkinson...?

randomimposter Fri 06-Nov-09 13:36:49

agree pink, I love Barry grinblush

thatsnotmymonster Fri 06-Nov-09 13:40:31

My 4mo neice is Lola.

I like it but it causes a lot of raised eyebrows with the older generation.

I had to explain to all my aunts/uncles etc that younger people are more familiar with Charlie and Lola than the showgirl!

Matilda is very popular atm.

Not much to say if your dh is adamant!

thatsnotmymonster Fri 06-Nov-09 13:41:02

Unless you get a surprise boy- that will solve the matter grin

Caro79 Fri 06-Nov-09 14:03:30

I have a four year old Lola. I fear it may become dated too. I still love it though.
They will have to unpick the embroidery on the towels if you're not keen on the name.smile

Eliza is very nice.

CarryOnDancing Fri 06-Nov-09 14:17:02

Fingers crossed for a lovely surprise boy then, think I would rather sell all the beautiful dresses than continue the dispute!

I know its my own fault for going along with Lola for so long. I wish it was as easy as unpicking towels but they too have expressed their desire for sticking with Lola, I don't want a black mark against my own name!

BUT DP has agreed to let her have Maggie as her middle name (after my nana, great nana and great-great nana) despite the fact he doesn't like that, so does he get first choice on first name?

I just can't get 'she is a showgirl' out of my head! On one hand I think it's cute and pos a bit 'hippy' and on the other I fear it's 'common'.

Argh-what to do?!!

MaggieMonday Fri 06-Nov-09 15:03:14

I must be in the older generation. I find the name Lola really inappropriate and a bizarre choice. It makes me think of lolita. It just basically reminds me of sexual predators grooming young girls. Awful name, or, the kind of name a woman in the sex industry would assume.

Eliza is lovely. Matilda is OK. Rowan is a bit different. All better than Lola.

Maggie is nice grin Margaret with Greta for short nice too!

CarryOnDancing Fri 06-Nov-09 15:18:59

Can I get you to call DP please MaggieMonday? You may have the passion to persuade him to at least consider other options!

claraquack Fri 06-Nov-09 15:24:18

Don't decide until the baby is born, only then will you know what she is! Having a shortlist is a good start but you may be suprised by how strongly you feel about what her name should be when she is here.

Fwiw I like Lola but actually prefer Maggie. I also love Greta though. Eliza is nice, I think of Rowan as a boy's name and Matilda is lovely but there are a lot of them.

Fillyjonk Fri 06-Nov-09 15:34:09

I think

1. Don't give your daughter a name you don't like. I think the name should be a compromise, so perhaps neither you nor dp get a name you love, but you should both at least like them.

2. Yes, Lola will date. So will Matilda and Eliza. Rowan might not, as it is a little moreu unusual. Don't think fact of name dating is that much of a big deal-it is more weird IMO when you get a name (like mine, actually) that is way out of sync. A 20 year old Mabel, (as opposed to either a 90 year old or a 1 year old Mabel)

diddl Fri 06-Nov-09 15:35:27

I would leave it until the baby is born, tbh.

You might decide it really suits& you do want to use it.

PyrotechnicToadstool Fri 06-Nov-09 15:37:22

Relatives have bought you embroidered towels when you don't even know if it's a boy or girl?

Lola is awful - sorry! Matilda and Rowan are lovely. Eliza, not so much.

diddl Fri 06-Nov-09 15:45:33

Is husband being stubborn as it´s his parents whobought the towels?

I assume you do at least know it´s a girl?

CarryOnDancing Fri 06-Nov-09 16:16:07

Yes we know its a girl.

Well family politics, he is being stubborn because he is just stubborn, but also because he thinks I've only changed my mind due to my family being less keen on the name and their preference to Matilda as it appears in our family tree. (which offends me I am not so weak minded but thats a whole dif debate!)
However this is not the source of my doubts, these arise from my general indecisiveness and fear of giving our daughter a name people will associate with a showgirl. I like the name but I don't like my own name and for that I hold my folks fully responsible, I don't want that my own head.

I love his parents, and especially wouldn't want to offend his mum by giving her extra embroidery but I sense DP feels I'm just being awkward and this may have filtered through to them.

I would like to highlight the fact that me and DP are extremely happy btw, we just have fun with our differences in opinion now and then, keeps things entertaining grin.

I swear never to discuss the name of child 2 until they are born and we have signed the birth certificate!

pranma Fri 06-Nov-09 16:19:22

But Lola in Charlie and Lola is lovely-I am 65 and that was my first thought,the showgirl thing didnt occur to me.

ScummyMummy Fri 06-Nov-09 16:23:30

Quite like Lola but Eliza is really fab, imo. But I also think you should ignore me and everyone else as I think you have to be v v v v careful not to be too much of a people pleaser here! Naming your baby is your and dp's decision alone, not the in-laws's or court of mumsbet's or anyone else's. And you and dp both have the licence to change your minds right till the last minute as well as having the power of veto over each other. You both need to be absolutely satisfied that you love the chosen name at the point you go to register it.

diddl Fri 06-Nov-09 16:29:22

Well, FWIW, I like Lola.

From others, perhaps Matilda.
Happen to prefer Elise to Eliza.

But if you really don´t like the name, you can´t use it.

Would your partner settle for it as a middle name?

I´m so glad we never told anyone what we were thinking of & when baby was born just said meet xxxxx!

Just as well, my Mum hated it & I couldn´t have taken months of her telling me that!

birdofthenorth Fri 06-Nov-09 18:01:58

I love Lola but I like all your other choices too, esp Rowan.

People are wrong to but you personlised towels etc before the birth, you have the right to change your mind at any point!

A friend of mine who gave birth recently told everyone her baby's name when 5 months pregant having just found out the sex, and stuck to this all the way through, then changed her mind once she'd given birth and met him. People (including me) had ordered personalised prezzies (but not given them yet) but none of us minded changing them, it was wholly their perogative to change their mind, we knew this was arisk when ordering stuff, everything could be replaced easily, the new name was lovely too, and at that stage the main event is the beautiful new human that has arrived, not the name!

birdofthenorth Fri 06-Nov-09 18:04:19

PS Jollster -entirely here what you're saying about Lola passing the Prime Minister test (or maybe lawyer/ doctor etc)... however I do feel the need to point out the President of Brazil is called Lula and it hasn't held him back on the world arena!!

TwentiethCenturyHeffa Fri 06-Nov-09 18:11:42

I wouldn't want to use a name I wasn't sure about - it's quite a personal choice, and people will judge you on the name you pick (whatever you choose) so I would feel uncomfortable if it wasn't a name I loved.

Personally, I'd associate Lola with Charlie and Lola, not Barry Manilow. It seems to be a reasonably popular choice these days as well, so I doubt the showgirl thing will be too much of a problem.

JesusChristOtterStar Fri 06-Nov-09 18:16:15

sorry but LOVE the other 3 of your names and feel iffy about lola

lolita - a couple of awful songs....

I have a child whose name conjures up images but i dont mind the connotations - people do comment ..

Teapot13 Fri 06-Nov-09 19:11:50

I kind of like the sound of Lola, but I agree that it will date. Maybe you should consider a more classic name (if you can think of one you like) for which Lola could be used as a nickname. That would also solve the "prime minister" problem. In the novel, "Lolita" was a nickname for Dolores, and Madonna's daughter is Lourdes but goes by Lola. I'm not necessarily suggesting either of these -- they're just examples.

In any case, the child's full name should be something you really like -- don't bow to pressure from family. Lots of parents pick names and then change their minds when a child is born.

KERALA1 Fri 06-Nov-09 19:29:34

Agree with Maggie about Lola. Sounds kinky and inappropriate for a little girl. I always think of the transvestite sone "walks like a woman and talks like man" one. Baffled by its popularity. All your other names lovely IMO.

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