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it is her name but no one else likes it

(24 Posts)
SevernTrentWater Fri 11-Sep-09 20:11:57

Phoenix is my daughters name! It is, i dreamt about it before she was born, i looked at her and saw it when she was born, but my partner liked willow, we chose willow, phoenix is a middle name, but i don't like willow, he hates phoenix and no one else likes it, but it's actually making me angry, phoenix is her name, it suits her, it's the name she should grow into. argg!! don't know what to do, i feel very frustrated.

Pielight Fri 11-Sep-09 20:15:41

What does your partner think? Does he feel as strongly about Willow as you do about Phoenix?

Pielight Fri 11-Sep-09 20:21:00

Oh I see he hates Phoenix.

This is a muddle.

I have a friend whose parents always call her by her middle name. I did once ask her why they didn't use that as her first name, and she said it was because the first name was their compromise name but her mum had actually liked the middle name.

So you may win out yet.

pinkthechaffinch Fri 11-Sep-09 20:21:25

Well, I like Phoenix!

Ignore everyone else, they'll get used to it in the end.

Littlefish Fri 11-Sep-09 20:22:05

Has your dd's name been registered?

You need to find a name on which you both agree. You can't call her a name which he hates, any more than you can call her a name which you hate.

HigherThanAWombat Fri 11-Sep-09 20:23:05

What Littlefish said. Even though I think that Willow is much nicer than Phoenix.

TeamEdward Fri 11-Sep-09 20:23:13

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MsHighwater Fri 11-Sep-09 20:24:22

You both have to like the name you choose for her.

warthog Fri 11-Sep-09 20:25:19

i think you should agree on a name you both like. why should she have a name your partner doesn't like?!?!

and i don't like either <pthhthtt>

allaboutme Fri 11-Sep-09 20:27:18

could you use a bit of each to make new name?

Wi-Fi? grin

SingingBear Fri 11-Sep-09 20:29:00

Message withdrawn

simplesusan Fri 11-Sep-09 20:29:14

I prefer Phoenix but both names are quite "strong" names that people will either love or hate, not like say the name laura which people may love or be indifferent to (no offence meant!)
Either way I don't see how you can use either name if neither of you likes both names iyswim.

TeamEdward Fri 11-Sep-09 20:30:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lilyloo Fri 11-Sep-09 20:34:03

Why didn't you find another name if you both didn't like eithers choice ?

seeker Fri 11-Sep-09 20:34:23

I don't think you can use such a "statement" name as Phoenix if you don't both LOVE it - it's going to be a topic of conversation and questions all her life, and you need to present a united front over something which may turn out to be controversial.

Why not scrap both names and go back to the drawing board.


Fimbo Fri 11-Sep-09 20:37:33

I knew someone years ago who was called one name by her dad and another by her mum. Her name was registered as Julie Gayle Bloggs but her dad liked Gayle and her mum liked Julie! She just answered to them both, although was always Julie at school.

MaggieVirgoOn Fri 11-Sep-09 20:40:08

Not a fan of either, but I prefer Phoenix. I'll be slated for saying this, but she has his sur name, you carried her for 9 months, gave birth to her, maybe breastfed her..... sorry guys, flame away, when the chips are down and there's and impasse... I think the mother should get her name of choice.

MaggieVirgoOn Fri 11-Sep-09 20:41:05

What about Phoebe Beatrix, nn Phoenix, that's less of an omg name. He might agree to that/??

Pielight Fri 11-Sep-09 20:42:26

Honestly, Julie and Gayle. You'd think with the two of them at loggerheads like that, one of them would have come up with something a bit more exciting. Like Julie and Constansia or Gayle and Tallulah

Julie and Gayle. I feel for her.

I think we need to find a new name OP. Let's try. You might need to move on from the Phoenix fixation.

Pielight Fri 11-Sep-09 20:43:23

OMG MaggieVirgo has come up with the most brilliant solution. What do you think to that OP?

HigherThanAWombat Fri 11-Sep-09 20:45:37

They both have to live with it and use it though so I don't see why the mother should get the final say.

I think a new name is needed. One you both like as Littlefish suggested.

lumnag Fri 11-Sep-09 20:46:26

Please go back to the drawing board. Scrap both names and start again.
There are millions of beautiful names.

Don't start your babies life the with such animosity.

Be united at least on this first parental duty.

Pielight Fri 11-Sep-09 20:47:35

Where' the water authority gone?

MaggieVirgoOn Fri 11-Sep-09 20:51:57


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