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What do you do when you love a name but dh hates it?

(30 Posts)
mosschops30 Fri 11-Sep-09 14:27:49

Its a name Id always loved if we ahd another boy and initially dh liked it.
He's now changed his mind and says 'no way'.

But I love it, I like the meaning, I like that it goes with the middle name weve chosen (dh's middle name), i like that it goes with our other childrens names and that
its biblical like ds's name.

I have jokingly told dh that after giving birth for the 3rd time I will call baby what I want, and that I'll be registering anyway, but I know it should be a joint decision.

The other names I liked, one just doesnt seem right for this baby and havent mentioned the other to dh yet in case he loves it and it finally overules my 1st choice hmm

Loujalou Fri 11-Sep-09 14:32:18

I loved Ben but DH hated it so we had to find one we both liked. Going off Ben a bit now but think you both have to like it otherwise its not fair. Unless you have some kind of rota but even then you both have to agree IMO. Its upsetting though.

Also, couldn't use other name I liked as it so doesn't go with our surname.

blametheparents Fri 11-Sep-09 14:34:41

I think that you just have to not use that name.

I love the name Imogen, and have done for many years, but DH was completely against it.

I toyed with the idea of emotional blackmail to get my own way after giving birth, but thought that was probably a bit mean!

I think you have to oth like the name.

pagwatch Fri 11-Sep-09 14:35:11

your children are both yours and his. It doesn't matter how right you think it is.
You know you have to chose a name you both like don't you?
Just keep looking.

PuppyMonkey Fri 11-Sep-09 14:37:18

What is the name?

cat64 Fri 11-Sep-09 14:39:55

Message withdrawn

mosschops30 Fri 11-Sep-09 14:45:18

dh likes lots of chavvy names wink

I like Noah James, but he likes James, which I find a bit bland.
My second choice would be Owen
I did like Isaac but gone of that now, doesnt suit baby if that makes sense

blametheparents Fri 11-Sep-09 14:57:01

Mmm, now Noah is a lovely name.
Perhaps that emotional blackmail after giving birth might be in order after all!

mosschops30 Fri 11-Sep-09 14:59:34

lol @ btp grin

MovingOutOfBlighty Fri 11-Sep-09 15:00:03

For DD, I loved Margot. DH hated it.

For DS, He loved Matthew, I thought it was so dull it made me want to weep.

So we founds something else we were both happy with.

Firawla Fri 11-Sep-09 15:37:38

unfortunately if dh hates it you just have to not use it, should be a name you both atleast can tolerate

PuppyMonkey Fri 11-Sep-09 15:40:37

Imagine if he was insisting on a name YOU hate....

scattercushion Fri 11-Sep-09 16:10:16

nearly die giving birth and he'll come round, like my DH did wink
Bit drastic though...

AtheneNoctua Fri 11-Sep-09 16:17:51

Obviously, you have to find a name you both like. Even if it one that neither of you loves.

Scorps Fri 11-Sep-09 16:19:04

My ExDP didn't like the name i wanted for our son. So i write his name on post it notes, and stuck them in his shoes, car, lunch box, bed, clothes drawer, bath things... it took about 2 days grin

DH & I are disagreeing on dd2 name - well I'm having what i want, cos he owes me big time.

bronze Fri 11-Sep-09 16:22:25

We had the same problem but for me it was Elijah. We settled on Isaac. I still feel sad about it but now used to it hes 5 months

janeite Fri 11-Sep-09 16:34:29

I agree - you have to find a compromise. Neither of my children have names that dp or I loved because we compromised with names we both liked, even if not passionately.

MamaLazarou Fri 11-Sep-09 18:43:00

You both have to love the name, unfortunately.

DH loves Ivy for a girl and Dashiell for a boy - YUCK

I like Oak and Ladybird, but he doesn't.

So we are not having Ivy, Dashiell, Oak or Ladybird!

shootfromthehip Fri 11-Sep-09 18:48:49

Another one that thinks that you both have to love a name or it's the wrong one. Why don't you have a shortlist of 4 name (2 each) and then when the LO arrives, have a look at him and then decide. DH and I were both certain on one name each and both took one look at DS and called him a name we'd rejected. Still a bit sad that he isn't a Tobias but more pleased that we called him a name tha suited him and that we both liked.

Everyone else hated it right enough wink grin

Wonderstuff Fri 11-Sep-09 18:49:09

We could only find one girls name we both like, don't know what will happen if we have another!
I sulked and stropped, but to no avail. I wasn't sure about the first/middle name comb, he (unwittingly I'm sure) had me agree just post birth when I was a bit spacey on the old pethidine and general post birth, everything is fab kinda thing. Then told everyone. hmm Shes nearly 2 still not convinced they go..

WhingeBobShitPants Fri 11-Sep-09 18:50:21

discard it and keep trawling until you find one you both fall in love with

it's a pain, but I couldn't live with knowing he didn't like the name as much as I did - it had to be perfect [OCD]grin

FiveGoMadInDorset Fri 11-Sep-09 18:52:57

Find something that both of you love.

HarrietTheSpy Fri 11-Sep-09 19:49:49

I wanted Clementine. He wanted Phoebe. We have a Verity.

HarrietTheSpy Fri 11-Sep-09 19:53:08

Zelma Ines was another possibility. Sought advice on here too. DH's grandmother and great grandmother's names. But DH LOATHED it.

This was before I became passionate about Clementine. I do understand really loving a name, it's hard, but if DH had forced Phoebe on me...would have been super sad and cross.

simplesusan Fri 11-Sep-09 19:57:09

I don't think you can use a name that your dh hates.
You will have to find a name that you both like rather than a name that only one of you loves.

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