Name change?

(10 Posts)
SoapySnowflake Fri 19-Nov-21 12:07:37

Hi everyone,

Just wondering if anyone had changed their baby’s name and then regretted it?

To cut a long story short, I’ve been having trouble getting to grips with my daughter’s name and am considering changing it. I’ve spoken at length with my husband about this and he has agreed to ‘trial’ the new name for a few days.

However, what’s bothering me is that her birth name will always be on her bc (the new name will be in the amendment box at the bottom) and all her cards from family and friends will say her existing name.

Has anyone been through similar and wished they’d have stuck with the original name? I can’t work out what I’d feel happier doing.

OP’s posts: |
ILoveShula Fri 19-Nov-21 12:21:47

I haven't but there are threads on here quite regularly, so you could do an advanced search.

PND may be a factor in why a mother can't get to grips with the name. If you suspect that you might have PND, please speak to your GP or practice nurse

The cards and birth certificate don't matter so much.
I never saw my baby cards and haven't used my bc more than a few times in my life

IamnotwhouthinkIam Fri 19-Nov-21 22:24:57

I agree the baby cards and even the BC don't matter so much (I don't think my parents even kept my baby cards for more than a few weeks and I've only looked at my BC a couple of times in my life!).

Keep trialling the new name for a few weeks to see if it feels more "natural" - if it doesn't, as pp suggested do consider whether you feel low in any other way and if so, contact your GP for help.

If it is just an issue with the original name, then change it and try not to have regrets. Remember there is no such thing as a "perfect name" - if it's trendy/popular then there might be several in their class/group, unusual and it might get commented on, it could have spelling or pronunciation issues, hidden teasing potential... naming is always a minefield and parents just have to do the best they can since baby unfortunately can't tell us whether they'd prefer a popular, uncommon or classic style etc name!

BTW If he/she only has one or two middle names at the moment, you could always add the old first name as an extra middle name for a Birth Certificate link - it might even be a nice, quirky story to tell your child when they are older!

Onlinedilema Sat 20-Nov-21 06:04:39

Yes there are plenty of threads on this so the feeling is quite common amongst new mothers.
Remember we all change.
Not many people use the same name they liked at age 10 for their child just as in 20 years time you would probably pick a different name from the one you have chosen now.
I would not rush into changing it. You don't sound certain at all. Your child's original name will always show on their birth certificate so be careful. If they prefer the original name they will ask why did you do this?
You can't predict what your child will like.
Whatever you do, don't rush into it.

BlanketGirl Wed 24-Nov-21 09:43:23

@SoapySnowflake how do you feel after trialling the new name?
I believe the original BC will show both names but any copy BC won’t but it’s also not a document that’s needed very often once you have other ID documents.

wingsofabird Wed 24-Nov-21 10:03:01

have you got another name in mind? I wouldnt change it unless youre 100% set on something else

AuntDympna Wed 24-Nov-21 11:06:58

Hi Soapy, congratulations on your little one!
I got a new short birth certificate which has the new name in big letters and doesn't mention the old name. I also got a passport, which only has the new name.
However, I couldn't get family to use the new name. They just didn't. Specially DH, which is pretty fundamental.
When it came to registering her for school, I changed the name back on a deed poll, and got a new passport.
The faffing around made me feel terrible, but I couldn't stop obsessing over it. Years later it's obvious to me that both names were fine.
Hope this helps, whatever you decide. Big hugs!


Santaischeckinglists Wed 24-Nov-21 11:11:16

Just change it. Think of it as a funny story to retell! I was told ds was a dd at the scans! He is nearly 18 and still laughs at when he was a girl with a girly name!! It really won't matter op.

SoapySnowflake Wed 24-Nov-21 16:59:55

Well I liked the new but DH really not keen so we are no further along. I do wonder whether there may be an element of PPD involved which is why I’m hesitant to change it in case a year down the line I look back and think ‘what on Earth was I worried about’ as @AuntDympna has mentioned. @IamnotwhouthinkIam’s message was helpful - there is no ‘perfect’ name. I think i worry a lot about making mistakes in every day life so this may be an extension of that. Perhaps I’m just massively overthinking it….

OP’s posts: |
IamnotwhouthinkIam Wed 24-Nov-21 17:34:48

I think it's completely normal to overthink it @SoapySnowflake - I'm exactly the same and I like to believe it just shows how much we care, but as parents we can only do our best. I'm having the same issue for my DS due in a few months - and most of my shortlist are top 50 timeless/classic names so in theory I shouldn't be able to go wrong grin but nothing is that impossible "perfect"!

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