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Men v Women. Who has more traditional or unusual taste- you or your partner?(30 Posts)
Wondering who tends to be more traditional and who tends to prefer to be more daring - men or women? Sorry this is quite a hetero-centric question but am still interested in any couple really.
Do you tend to find men or women prefer more unusual names or more traditional names?
Just interested really.
I really like traditional, top 10 kind of names and dh likes very unusual names. We compromised with names which are in top 100 but not top 20.
Not sure if it’s related but dh has a very, very common surname so possibly likes more usual names because of this. I grew up with a very unusual, hard to spell, foreign surname so I possibly like very popular names you don’t have to spell out and explain to people.
We settled on a girls name, for a different type of name (my choice) in the 80’s. When she was born, she didn’t look like that type of name. DH didn’t have a clue what I was on about and said it looked like a baby girl
I think women are far more creative with names.
I suppose it’s just our individual life experience. His brother has a more unusual name, whereas my DH has a vey popular 1980s name. His brothers name isn’t obscure or wacky, it just wasnt very common at that time (along the lines of Laurence etc) anyway his brother got really bullied at school because of his weight and also because of his name. His brother has now given his children top 10 names. For him he obviously just wants a name that totally blends in so that even if that child gets bullied, the name will be the hardest thing to pick on as one of the bullies (or someone else in the class), is likely to be named something similar.
Orlando I would probably remember as i would make the connection with Bloom.
Buddy I also remember because of Buddy Holly. But many of the other underused names round here totally escape my brain 🤦♀️ Mike is really easy to remember for me x
Similar with our first born (boy). Both tended more towards traditional / classic names and naming DS was easy. We’re now expecting a girl in the next few weeks and have really struggled. His taste in girls names is traditional / currently popular, but I seem to be preferring slightly shorter / more unusual names this time. I’m sure we’ll get there in the end... 😬
He basically thinks your name should be the least interesting thing about you.
See, I think a name should identify you. And that has nothing to do with how 'interesting' or otherwise your name is.
I can definitely remember an Orlando much better than another Steve or Mike, of which I know so many!
@Lavenderblues I also agree a name should identify you. And I didn’t like having such a common name at school and always having my initial after it. But as I’ve got older I must say I personally find that is it the less common names that I always seem to find harder to remember. For instance i know a saskia (which is now a very rare name) but in my head I always am about to say “hello scarlet” as the name Scarlet is more popular and more familiar to me.
Another example, There’s 2 Isla’s local to me and I never forget their names. But I do forget the little girl called Elysa’s and Alecia. (I’ve probably spelt them wrong there). I actually do find popular names easier to remember 🙈
@Lavenderblues yes I see what you mean. My DH likes traditional AND popular names. His favourite is Oliver. He basically likes the top 10 names. He basically thinks your name should be the least interesting thing about you.
I don't think traditional is the opposite of unusual.
My favourite names are unusual (as in outside top 100) AND traditional (as in well known).
I dislike fashionable names as they tend to sound 'dated' as they inevitably fall out of fashion.
We both agreed on our DS name (a classical, timeless, just outside of top 10 name)
For DD1 my DP suggested things like Joanne / Shannon - names which to me are really dated. In the end he found the name we went with, an old lady name.
DD2 also has an old lady name, also found by DP!
I never became a Mum, to my regret, but if I had, I would have chosen a nice, normal, fairly familiar name for a child of either sex. Having grown up with a very old (biblical, old testament) but unusual name, I LOATHED my parents for saddling me with it. I hated having it mispronounced, I hated having to spell it and I hated having to explain it. I was the only one with my name in my entire 1800 student school. I'd never do that to a child of mine. As an adult, the best I can say is that I'm resigned to my weird name. I don't love it, I don't much like it, but I'm resigned to it, used to it (over 50 years) and others tell me THEY like it.....my inner ten year old despises the effect it had on me. So, I'd call a child something familiar, but not fashionable. A nice, classic name that they could live with.
I hate weird and wonderful names, i hate weird spelling even more! But when it came to name choosing i preferred less common names for girls but more traditional boys names and my husband had similar taste. The name that we chose for DD1 (an uncommon name i had loved for years even before i met DH) suddenly became really popular when i got pregnant which annoyed me but we still called her it! DH gave DD2 her first name and its in the top 100 but was in the 80s when we had her.
My dh is definitely the more 'adventurous' when it comes to choosing names.
I'm surprised that anyone would actually want a name that they have to share with others... imo a name should identify you!
I remember an interview with Liam Payne when he said he wanted a normal traditional popular name but Cheryl wanted a name that was a bit different so that “when you leave a room you remember it”.
Thought this conversation was very similar to the ones my friends have with their husbands (who all wanted top 10 style popular names for their sons)
@poppydaisys interesting. I suppose everyone is different. My DH loves having a common name. He said he’d have hated anything remotely different. His middle name is Martin (which I fully appreciate is not weird at all!) but my DH found it too unusual and often just said he doesn’t have a middle name because he found it embarrassing. But largely he’s indifferent to names. He can’t understand why I’d give it a second thought. He’d be happy just to look at the UK list of top 10 names and pick one. His favourite girls name is Emily (I love it too)
It is backed up by the statistical data though @Flymetothestars - a larger percentage of baby boys are given a top 10 and top 100 name when compared to girls.
@Grufallosfriends I got fed up of being known by my first name plus initial but my DH (also with popular 80s name) says he couldn’t have cared less. Actually the opposite. He liked having others with the same name as him in his class and said it made for an automatic friend and also competitor!
He loves traditional but common top 10 names. His fav is Oliver
My dh was very keen that our dc don't have a common top 100 name. We both love underused classic names.
I agree that most kids, whether boys or girls, prefer to have their 'own' name and not be known as Jack A or Jack B etc.
Also, I don't think that the alternative to 'traditional' is 'unusual'. Lots of popular top 100 names are 'modern' rather than 'traditional'. And lots of lovely underused classics outside the top 100 are very traditional (just not trendy right now).
I think it's more to do with a lot of men not being as creative with names and not too bothered about thinking outside the top 50.
Makes me wonder if men themselves tend to prefer having common names whereas women themselves tend to prefer to have more unique names-
I don't think that's true and know quite a lot boys who dislike sharing their common name and having to add their surname initial.
I think most people prefer to have a name that identifies them easily, that belongs to 'them'.
Nobody, however, wants to have a silly or teasable name.
Like DramaAlpaca it's a long while since we were naming babies, but fortunately dh and I like similar type of names. Relatively traditional with criteria like being fairly obvious how to spell them and how to pronounce them.
I know my dsis and dbil really struggled to find names for each of their dc, but it was him that liked
weird less common names and my dsis that had to reign him in.
I know, plural of data doesn't = anecdote, but I presume you are just asking for our personal experiences.
There may be something in that for adults, but I think it's fairly homogenous for kids in that both boys and girls overwhelmingly prefer to have ordinary names, and to fit in rather than stand out. Children are v much pack animals!
DH and I are both pretty traditional in our naming preferences, but his "out there" wild card choices are of a totally different "brand" to mine! I also noticed when we were compiling initial lists for DC1 pre gender scan that - while my list had inspiration from all sorts of sources - his list for boys' names consisted of the names of his three male cousins, the names of his two best friends and the name of his grandfather. His father's name (also the name of a maternal uncle) would definitely also have featured had it not been politically impossible (various family feud type reasons).
His girl list was just the names of his female friends and a lady he worked with that used to bring him cups of tea.
My DH much more traditional and loves “top 10” type names
Makes me wonder if men themselves tend to prefer having common names whereas women themselves tend to prefer to have more unique names- and they both apply that logic to their kids. Obviously there’ll be loads of exceptions to this of course.
As women we’re sort of encouraged by society to stand out a bit (dress up, wear make up etc), whereas men are encouraged to wear suits and look similar? Am I getting ahead of myself 😆
It's a while since we were naming babies, but we had similar taste and both like quite traditional and classic names.
We're both traditional, but since we're of different nationalities we try to choose names that work in both languages and aren't weird in either country.
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