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How does using a name "honour" anyone?

(19 Posts)
user1474926891 Mon 26-Sep-16 23:07:58

My friend is giving her DD two names, which she isn't particularly keen on, in order to "honour" her granny and her DH's gran.

I don't understand this. It's just a word. It isn't the person. They didn't even choose the names themselves originally.

Seems a shame to waste the opportunity to think of names you really, truly love.

JassyRadlett Mon 26-Sep-16 23:17:35

Because names have meaning, otherwise why would we bother? And for some people the meaning is in the euphony or the appearance of the name itself, for others it is the associations the name has that matter more, including linking a child to their heritage through the sharing of names.

Neither is wrong. Just different priorities in naming.

Both my kids have middle names with strong family links. I wouldn't have given either as a first name but they are fine and I like that the names link them to previous generations of their family.

My own middle name is totally random. No reason except that my mother liked it. For me, middle names are such an incidental thing and mine is a bit nothing and there for no reason except it 'goes with' my first name.

Cherryskypie Tue 27-Sep-16 02:08:20

In my case because I knew my grandfather would love the thought of a child being named after him. He had a very healthy ego grin

Threebedsemii Tue 27-Sep-16 02:10:05

Of course it does- how does it not honor someone to name then after them?

Dreamer100 Tue 27-Sep-16 02:10:13

You must be a bit dense not to understand this.

Cherryskypie Tue 27-Sep-16 02:12:53

I do understand what you mean as I really don't like my name and would never have used my mother's name (though I love her dearly) as it's bloody awful. I wouldn't use a name I actively disliked.

OlennasWimple Tue 27-Sep-16 02:45:46

I don't understand why you don't get this confused

But I agree with Cherry that I wouldn't want to use a name that I actively disliked, just for the association.

katemess12 Tue 27-Sep-16 04:13:09

I have a name that honours two people: my great grandmother and my mother. I "get" the great grandmother, kind of, because she was dead before I was born and my father adored her. I don't "get" being name after my still living mother, as much as I adore her.

I decided that my children will not share a name, knowingly, with anyone in the family. I am one of several katemess' in the family, and I don't like it, especially because I share a name with someone I don't like or have any respect for.

The only exception is that my first son will be indirectly named after my dad, who passed away when I was a baby. Indirectly because I will be using the nickname (vastly different from his real name) he was known by, not his proper name, because, again, his proper first name was a family one, and I don't like or respect the person he was named after.

When there are so many names I love, I'm not going to not use them just because I want to please someone in my family.

craicname Tue 27-Sep-16 08:18:21

I never met my dad's mum as she died young. I would have been her first grandchild so I have her name as a middle name. I love it. It gives me some connection to her, to history, to my dad.

I kind of think middle names are pointless if they're not to honour someone to be honest!!!

Scarydinosaurs Tue 27-Sep-16 08:21:17

Because sometimes you love the name because of the person.

I would be honoured if someone named their child after me! It's highly unlikely given my unusual name...but it could happen one day!

BWatchWatcher Tue 27-Sep-16 08:21:31

We use names in my family to remember people, where they came from and their good qualities. It gives the children a sense of connection with their past and the people who lived so that they can live.
That said, I'm glad my dh's father was not calle Derek or Ferdinand ;)

JasperDamerel Tue 27-Sep-16 08:27:35

I have two family middle names, and I am very glad. my surname has been passed down from father to the son, but my middle name was my maternal grandmother's name, and that of her childless aunt, and so on. It feels like having a link with women in my past who I have never met, but are still somehow part of me. DD has the middle name of her great grandmother who died just before she was born and likes hearing stories about her and also feels a special connection.

Stevefromstevenage Tue 27-Sep-16 08:35:42

Of course naming a child after someone honours them. Why would it not? A person means so much to you that you want to call your child after them. Seriously you don't think that? Names can be lovely for many reasons, they sound nice, they remind you of someone you loved etc etc

MrsJayy Tue 27-Sep-16 08:42:20

I don't understand how you don't understand it. a person in your life you loved and respected or a person that is no longer in your life but you want to carry on their name in your family if names had no meaning we would all be called grunt or car.or something.

MrsJayy Tue 27-Sep-16 08:46:31

I have a tonne of girls/women in my extended family most of them have the same middle name its a lovely family connection that goes through the generations same with the men/boys

TheDowagerCuntess Tue 27-Sep-16 08:52:31

What's not to get?

People, buildings, universities, road, towns, mountains, rivers, lakes, geographical features are all named after other people. To honour them.

It's not a tricky concept.

TheDowagerCuntess Tue 27-Sep-16 08:57:35

I'm named after both my grandmothers, both of whom died before I was born. Now that I'm an adult, I really appreciate that connection.

0pti0na1 Tue 27-Sep-16 09:57:26

It's not a phrase I heard until a few years ago, usually from Americans (I can visualise it with the "honor" spelling. It's a nice way of putting it. However I would say someone was "named after" someone and that would obviously imply that it was for good reasons.

MrsJayy Tue 27-Sep-16 10:00:28

Yes named after is what it really is

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