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How do you actually decide on a name? <lost>

(9 Posts)
NellyBluth Tue 28-Jun-16 16:45:51

With DD it seemed easy. We had a name in mind for a girl since before we even started TTC, and so once we knew she was a girl she was always going to be called that name. No debate, no worries, so very easy.

Now we're having a boy. I don't want DH's favourite name, he doesn't want mine. Fine, they are both off the list.

I get the theory of it. Write a list, look at it, come up with a name you both agree on. But none of the names are grabbing me. None! And the thing is, we both have a gut feeling we want a very 'normal', traditional names like James and Robert and William, so we can't even go scouring through baby name books for a name we've not thought of.

This baby is doomed to remain forever nameless. How on earth do you do it?

Snowberry86 Tue 28-Jun-16 16:47:03

I'm having the same trouble. My DH doesn't like anything I like but had offered nothing else as a solution and although I have a few I like I can't find anything I love.

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Tue 28-Jun-16 16:49:10

Well,I decided on a name then told my dh wink the angst on here is a constant source of amazement to me!

CourtJester Tue 28-Jun-16 16:52:47

Even though you know you like that sort of traditional names, there might be some that you have forgotten about. James, William, Thomas, Harry all seem very popular right now, but i personally always forget about Adam, Anthony, Simon, Samuel, Benjamin, Richard, Ryan, Daniel, Dominic, Declan, Christopher, Nicholas, Timothy until i hear them on TV or see them on one of these threads.

Maybe you can find something similar to your normal/traditional theme that you hadn't thought of before.

NellyBluth Tue 28-Jun-16 17:12:03

I tried that, Dame, but sadly he cottoned on to what I was doing grin

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Tue 28-Jun-16 17:24:41


septembersunshine Tue 28-Jun-16 18:50:05

We had 6 months of 'discussions' (which was basically DH and I disliking each others choice of names) until eventually we decided on a family name (previously ruled out by me due to the fact I hate using family members names - dead or alive - for new babies). Anyway we have a name we both love but it was a real task (it's our 4th and second ds). Having said that I will be bringing a back up list to hospital on the off chance we change our minds having met the boy.

I think the key is to try to form an attachment to a particular name so it stands out in your mind as 'the one' or at least as something other names don't. So think about favourite books/films/favourite place (we used Charlotte for our dd's second name because we met on Queen Charlotte street). Is there a particular letter that sounds good with your surname? Just anything!! Plus keep making lists and writing out the names and something might click - there is this site I love - google 'British Baby Names' and they have really good lists on there. Good luck!

septembersunshine Tue 28-Jun-16 18:51:45

WankersHacksandThieves Tue 28-Jun-16 19:00:06

With DS1 we went through books etc, came up with a shortlist - he was born and then none of the sames seemed right for an actual human being (they were all normal names btw) Anyway, it was graduation time in the newspapers so we just went through the lists there and came up with a choice of two and picked one.

With DS2 we didn't bother in advance. When he was born we already had to dismiss the alternative name we'd had for DS1 as while we still liked it, the two names didn't sound good together. We tried pins in a map....we then just went through the books again, came up with a total list of about 12 names and just passed the list back and forward scoring a name off each time. We ended up with two very similar names. I got to pick and DH got to choose the spelling.

How about:

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