Parents hate baby name (Susie)(129 Posts)
After a week of um/ah OH and I finally decided to call DD2 Susie Florence.
On telling my folks my dad asked - where did that come from?!? Is it your final decision? My mum said straight out she doesn't like it and that she'll call the baby Flo (I only picked Florence after her constant pestering! I actually prefer Mia or Rose as a middle name)...
Anyway they both want me to change my mind and I'm really upset. Is it such an awful name?!? And what should I do now - OH is v annoyed at the thought of changing it, he loves it and thinks they're being mean to me! And we've found it hard to agree. Alice has been a contender and I know my parents would prefer it but I couldn't get the 'who the is Alice' song out of my head!
Am up feeding not just fretting, but this is really on my mind - any advice?!?
You need to give her the middle name you want. Fuck Florence if you're not into it.
Susie is cute. I like it.
I Iove it.... And with mia or rose....
I quite like Susie, but Susan is (to most people of around 50 or over) probably the most boring, run of the mill, over-used, unimaginative name they can think of and your mother probably had four in her class, or had an auntie of a next door neighbour called Sue. It has connotations of dullness and datedness to her.
Think of the most common boring name of your generation or of women 10-15 years older than you, and imagine calling a baby that. That's how she feels.
BUT. You like it and that's all that matters. Your mother is being unreasonable and rude, and she'll just have to get used to it. She had her turn to pick names when she named you. Tell her to grow up and shut up, and to have some respect for your choices. It's not like you called her anything ludicrous or outlandish, she should be grateful for that.
They are being ridiculous.
It's a beautiful name and even if it wasn't it's got fuck all to do with them.
I'd be putting my foot down about what your mother decides to call her too - her name is Susie, not Flo.
My niece is half Chinese and when she was born DB and his wife gave her a Chinese first name and a British middle name. My DM hated the Chinese name and said she would call her by her middle name. 7 years on she is called by her Chinese name and ii think my mum has forgotten she ever said she didn't like it. He name completely suits her. Give your parents time and they will probably come round.
It's lovely and it's your baby. She had her chance to name her baby when she named you. Now it's your and your DP's turn. I would tell her that you are now intending on taking out the Florence as you don't want her called that.
Let me tell you a story...
DS2 was born on a Sunday night. We had named DS1 quickly and were happy with the name so my DM expected the same with DS2. We weren't sure from our shortlist but DM wanted to be able to announce her new grandson's name at her hobby group on the Monday evening. She visited first thing Monday morning telling us that it was a shame he hadn't yet got a name (he was 7 hours old). She then phoned several times that day to check whether we had decided. I felt under pressure and we chose DH's favourite which I was quite happy with. I rang to tell her with minutes to go before her deadline as she went out to her hobby group.
DF answered the phone, heard the name and went quiet except to say, "You'd better tell your mother!" DM came to phone, heard the name and exploded with a 20 minute tirade on why it was inappropriate, and unacceptable, and she wouldn't be calling him that. The name was perfectly ordinary, if not often chosen at that time (more popular since).
I came off the phone in tears, with her saying that if she had to tell her hobby group that name she would be explaining how tired I must have been to come up with it. In my desperation I told her in that case to hold fire and I would talk more about it with DH.
DH was very unhappy, not only at the name debacle, but at how upset I was. However, we talked more and decided that although it wasn't for my DM to choose our son's name, it didn't feel fair on him that she would introduce him to people throughout his childhood with an apology for his name (and she would have). We changed the name which took us three days and said we would never tell DS2 about what happened.
DM was happy with the new name and we grew accustomed to it. We didn't get our wish of him never knowing though. As soon as he was old enough to understand she told him the story by telling a complete stranger (at a stately home - oh the irony) in front of him and me.
That is our story. Think very hard about changing Susie's name. It is beautiful. Think hard about whether you want a little Flo though. If not, change to Mia or Rose or anything else you love. Please don't take second best for your little one. You will remember every time you have to write her name on anything. You'll remember as you apply for a passport, and you'll remember as she makes her wedding vows. She is your daughter. Make your own choice for her; it is one of the first of many many more.
P.S. The little girl I never had would have been Susie. I absolutely love it.
And a big congratulations to you and your DH on your new DD
Agree with all the above! It's your baby, you're up feeding now, you've done the hard work, you get to choose the name. Your mum will come around.
Your mum had her chance, she named you.
A quick word of advice, if your mum is 'bossing' you around now 'giving in' to her will only make it worse. Is seriously consider changing her middle name to what YOU (and dh, of course), prefer.
It's a lovely name, and you and your OH are happy with it for your baby. I think, whilst it's also an emotional time for them, your parents have WAY overstepped the line here. It's more likely to push you to call her Susie Rose to get your mother to back off. Enjoy your baby girl - and Homebird tells a very sad and cautionary tale. Congratulations - I love newborn snuggles, enjoy her.
I think Susie is a lovely name and quite unusual these days. Susanna is gorgeous too with Susie for short. I love Susanna Rose.
It was rude of your family to be so vocal about your name choice especially as you were introducing your baby not asking for opinions.
Susie is lovely. I wouldn't change it.
Your parents had their time to name their babies. It's now your time to name yours; not theirs to have a second go.
Susie is beautiful and uncommon. Your mum got to name her children without pressure, so don't let her sideline you and DH. She might not like it now but it's not her choice, and I bet you anything that it will grow on her as your little one develops her personality.
Mia and rose are also gorgeous names to go with Susie. Good luck with your decision!
Susanna Rose sounds great. I would be inclined to ditch the Florence because your DM can't be trusted not to use it. I think that it also depends on how often you see your parents. If it is once week then that would be worse although they may accept the name quicker. Once a year on the other side of the world and you could grin and bare the odd Flo here and there.
Right ok , I assume this is your first baby,so everyone is very emotional BUT the number one fact is that this is YOUR baby , you are her mother .Your mother has had her turn , but she hasn't quite got used to the idea that her baby has grown up and is now a mother herself! Your Dh and you created this child , and she is your responsibility , if you change her name then everytime to have to write it etc you will remember , and how sad for your Dh that your parents got to name his precious first baby .
This is a line in the sand , you need to step up to the plate and calmly tell your parents that her name is Susie ( gorgeous and due a revival ) and frankly if they don't like it that's their problem .If you pander to them now where will it stop , will they choose her nursery , her school , her first shoes . This is your moment to stand up for your Dh and dd , you are grown up now , not a child and her name is up to you, not to them , shame on them by the way , you have produced a gorgeous granddaughter for them and all they can do is fuss about her name .
By the way I know so many people who have had the " well I'm going to call them X " line .It never happens , they soon realise how silly it sounds and as soon as your dd can talk she will start to correct them herself 😀
I'm in my 50s and I think Susie Rose is a wonderful name.
Frankly, your mother ought to realise that she has had her turn at naming children and now it's your turn.
Don't use Flowers if you don't 100 per cent want it.
She is rude and narcissistic to refuse to use the name you chose. Stick to your guns - your baby will force her to use and even like Susie eventually.
Hilda the OP says that this is DD2 in her first sentence.
Tho it does make me wonder what they ere like when you named DD1?
Wow that's mean of your parents. Stick with your decision and change the middle name too if that's what you want. Your baby, your choice.
ps it's a lovely name but that's irrelevant here really.
Good lord, she's your baby - tell your DM to go and fuck herself.
Why parents think they have any input into the naming of a grandchild I have no idea.
Great name, OP
Oh dear you are right , sorry didn't read properly, well I still think it's nothing to do with your parents and you shou,d stand your ground .And congratulations by the way !
We had a shortlist for ds2 and we ended up choosing mum's least favourite of the three names when he was born. Introducing him to my mum a few hours after I said "He's Ewan - sorry you don't like it much!" And my mum replied. "I do now!"
Susie is lovely - your mum is being selfish and as PP have said stand up for yourself and DH!
Ah this brings back memories!! My MIL did the exact same thing to me with DD1. I chose a perfectly normal, some would say mundane, name for her that DH & I were happy with and really didn't expect the ott reaction from her. She was furious she didn't get a say, and said that she would call DD1 by her chosen name.
I stayed firm, and so did she. She introduced the baby to all her friends by HER chosen name. It caused such friction and upset, I cannot begin to describe it.
Fast forward 10 years and DD1 thinks her grandmother is slightly odd for using a random name for her. MIL does other odd things too, but this name-issue has meant that DD1 has never warmed to her and they've drifted apart. I made it a point to never pass comment... This happened quite naturally.
Susie is a beautiful name. Don't give in now, it will be the first of many clashes.
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