Baby Names - why are some people so rude?(152 Posts)
OK a bit of a rant here. My ds was nameless when he was born, but now 3 weeks on dh and I finally compromised on a name - Isaac.
Now I know whatever name you pick there will always be people who like it, and other people who don't. However, I am really surprised by some people's reactions to the name we chose. I've had some that have laughed, someone who asked if I was serious, someone who said 'oh dear', MIL who decided she's going to call him Ben (one of our considered alternatives) regardless, and my family who keep coming up with alternatives.
It just makes me fume - especially as I don't think the name we chose is that unusual. If people don't like the name why can't they keep their opinions to themselves? Or am I odd in that I would never dream of telling anyone that their baby's name was not nice?
I think I could do with one of Twinkie's famous put down lines ...
Metrobaby - your MIL's reaction is a bit mad isn't it! It really made me laugh - reminds me of a monty pyton sketch.
DS2's name is really unusual and we were nervous about using it - but as we both loved it we went ahead - I can't believe how rude some people have been about it though it's none of their bloody business!
I love the idea of calling your MIL a random different name everytime she call's your DS Ben (noeleen / fennella / concepta / agnes / etc you could work through the alphabet)
Also reminded me of Wilkl and Grace when Will's friend Clare wanted him to father her baby. Jack didn't like Clare as a name so called her Bettina.
Well the Puritans would open the Bible point to a phrase, and that would be the poor kids name. One poor sod was called Job Raked Out The Ashes.
All the boys names I liked when I was pregnant - one of which was Isaac, were rejected by my dp as too Jewish.
I didn't really understand - I mean they were biblical but so is John and Paul but he liked them.
I liked Ezra, Elijah, Jacob and Isaac.
Anyway we had a girl, and we did call her Cabbage.
How rude of people, at least there won't be 3 or 4 Isaac's in his class at school - I think it is nice to have an unusual name, both my kids have unusal names - all you have to say to adverse comments is "well we like it"
gyscrym we had a cleaner called Bettina. WE called her Bettina the cleaner (of course) and to make it even better she was Polish (as in mr sheen)
Haven't read this thread, just the original post.
Metrobaby, i LOVE that name
Why too, do men not understand the importance of finding out a new babies name.
Dp went to the chippie the other day and said to me 'that lady from nursery was in there and she's had her baby, a girl so and so weight e.t.c e.t.c.'
BUT he never asked the babies name. That was all i really wanted to know.
Aren't you in Sheen CD?
Davros - we had a Sister Mary Benignus at our school - got called SM Big Knickers of course.
I don't think Isaac is very unusual - know of 2.
I remember when my mum was in hospital about 4 weeks after my daughter was born. She told someone there the name of her new granddaughter and she (the stranger) went "Urgh". I have to laugh at such open rudeness.
Oh yes Tinker I am! But at the time was in Putney, or was it Chiswick. So long ago I can't remember!
I like Isaac- it has just been added to my boys list....
I lvoe the name Issac. if dd2 had been a boy she would have been Issac.
I know an Isaac too and think it is a lovely name. His parents are shortening it to Zac but obviously when he's older he can go for the full effect if he likes.
Ds has a Welsh name (both grandfathers are Welsh). Mixed response. Thought we'd gone easy on him by giving him the English spelling (is fairly common as a surname) but you would not believe the number of people who can't get their heads round it and insist on calling him by a similar Irish name. Does the letter 'v' really sound like 'u'? I think not!
Am so sick of explaining that Welsh names are reflexive so originally you would be (English translation) David son of Owen; your son would be Owen son of David; so we get David and Owen as first names and Davies and Owens as surnames, etc. etc....
My DS is Izaak, and it is IMHO a wonderful name. Most people can spell it right, but MIL refuses to learn how to spell it right, although she absolutely adores him. He is funny about people's names though, if he doesn't like someones name he will call them something else, for example my sisters DH is called Jon, but DS calls him George and refuses to acknowledge he's called anything else. And he calls one of DH's friends 'That Burglar' for some reason best known to himself. DD would have been Reuben if she had been a boy.
Since when did Isaac become unacceptable? It is a good solid name(IYKWIM) My ds twin2 is Adam (another old name), ds twin1 is Niall (old but more unheard of outside Ireland.)
On hearing the names a couple of times I have heard the comment "why did you pick such a boring name like Adam." Just because it is popular now but it has personal meaning to me.
MIL is just being an MIL, like others have said call her by another name, see how she likes it.
After telling everyone what we were calling ds I have decided to keep quiet with the new baby name! My father was such a pain and everything we came up with he had a problem with. People are SO rude and it is nothing to do with anyone else. Ds is Max and our surname begins with 'N' and so my father said everyone would call him Mac Sn.......!! Fool!! I was really cross and have will not tell him the names we have for this one! FWIW I think Isaac is lovely.
when some people found out i was calling ds james i got the its a very traditional name (as in old fashion) couldnt you think of anything else so i always say the same thing its my fathers middle name and if its good enough for him its good enough for my son people need to think beefore they speak but in one aspect some people got to realise that there name is the first thing they learn to spell so some of the realy weired names can make it harder for the child in later life but isaac and nice traditional name easy to spell and sounds cute aswell oh and congrats on the birth
I wanted Isaac for ds and I actually think it would suit him more than Bob. But dh didn't like it and that's fine, he is the only other person with a say.
My MIL calls Bob anything except Bob (even tried Berty a couple of times, which has drawn horrified looks). Her reasoning is that she can't bear it, it reminds her of old men, dogs and builders. Tremendous, that could explain why she can go weeks without seeing him even though she lives in the same town.
She won't call my dh by his prefered shortening of his name either. I on the other hand am super good at correcting people who call her Grandma (she chose Gran.)Maybe you need to call her whichever version of Grandma most annoys her, or call her Grandad or Auntie.
She absolutely can't call him Ben, it's not his name!
Metrobaby ... I haven't read all the other replies but my blood is boiling for you ... especially about your MIL - how rude!!!!
I had a similarish experience when DS was born ... I wonder how I can explain without giving away his name?
We named him ... and with his name there are a few shortened versions so we stated which 'version' he was to be. Then a couple of friends of ours diminutised it to a version I didn't like and they kept calling him that. Even when I asked them not to. I was really upset by it as I felt that they had no respect for my choice of name for my own son ... it still makes me mad when I think about it today ...
I know we have all joked about 'Apple' but really whatever anyone chooses to call their child is their call and THAT is THAT!!!
I would never dream of telling someone that I didn't like their choice of name either ...
PS FWIW ... I think Isaac is a wonderful name
when i was having dd i didnt tell anyone the name i was thinking of as i didnt want their negative input influencing me....as it happened she was a week old anyway before she had her unusual name. I have heard it before but only in books etc. when people ask they either beam at me straight away and say "oh that is SUCH a beautiful name" or they look a bit shocked & go "er, ohh, er, well thats er very unusual isnt it?" (roughly translates as "ewwweee, dont like it" sod them though, i like it and it suits her.
I had a favorite Aunt name Lavinia and I really wanted one of my girls to have that name, everyone was totally opposed to it. The deciding factor for me was when I told a good friend's sister that I wanted to name my baby Lavinia and she said(I kid you not) "Lavinia that sounds just like Chlamydia" and that sort of put me off the name forever! People can be so rude!
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